Please Help Me

Icanandwillsavemoney

madmalteaser wrote: »

What a fantastic letter, and it's great that you now have some support with this situation. I'm really glad you spoke to your boss as well, it sounds like his support has given you the strength to fight back against your ex. Good luck with this and let us know what happens! x

I can't believe I have spent 3 days crying and worrying about telling my boss. When I left worked he joked... 'let us know when you are on Jeremy Kyle'!!! How good is he, he really did make me feel better and safe work.

Icanandwillsavemoney

Can I just say a massive thank you to you all. Thanks to you and a couple of close friends, I STOOD UP FOR MYSELF today. Ok I have been sick a few times and have cried a lot but I still did it. Thank you.

Letter has been sent recorded delivery - OMG. I am now going to remove it from here as per RAS's suggestion.

Also, thank you to all those with the phone downloads suggestions... turns out number 2 son had pinched my cable so I typed the text log. He is bringing the cable round from his home so I will download them properly then.

Now on to my debts.... I can get rid of those too... might take a few years but hey... I'm only 39 so lots of life left to enjoy after they are gone.

I stood up for myself.... can't quite get my head round that!!!

Icanandwillsavemoney

theunknownstuntman wrote: »

What a nasty little git. Not all men are controlling bullys like this. The above info really interested me as I'm a serving copper. I would hazard a guess that he was booted out and failed his probationary period as he was found out to be a bully and not a nice chap. -This would not suprise me in the least.

I can only offer hugs (i've got big arms!) and agree with the excellent advice you have already received on here. 400 texts IS harassment. Excellent thinking keeping the emails and texts and logs of both. I'd recommend taking them to the police and getting a restraining order on him.

Stunty.

Now that the letter has gone to his solicitor, if she is any good she will warn him that his actions will result in a restraining order. If I can do what I have today then I can go through with that too. Thank you

Burlesque_Babe

Icanandwillsavemoney wrote: »

Can I just say a massive thank you to you all. Thanks to you and a couple of close friends, I STOOD UP FOR MYSELF today. Ok I have been sick a few times and have cried a lot but I still did it. Thank you.
I stood up for myself.... can't quite get my head round that!!!

:T :T :T

It's a wonderful feeling, isn't it. I too used to be like this - no confidence, appalling low self-esteem, walked over for fear of saying 'no'. However, I had a big 'event' which made me change and I ended up standing up to a very nasty bully who caused me to leave my job through going through a grievance and threat of a tribunal. You know what........doing that - something I remember saying I could never do when it first started - in a weird way triggered me to start standing up for myself in other areas of my life. It takes time, but once you've done something 'big' everything else feels a hell of a lot easier to do and the more times you do it, the easier it becomes

RAS

Icanandwillsavemoney wrote: »

Thanks to you and a couple of close friends, I STOOD UP FOR MYSELF today. Ok I have been sick a few times and have cried a lot but I still did it. Thank you.

I stood up for myself.... can't quite get my head round that!!!

Well done.

Now if we can help you organise the debts, boost your income, pare a bit of the spends, we are still here.

In_Search_Of_Me

yet another example of the power of dfw and fight against the bullies! Thanks stunty for coming on to confirm that the texts were harassment...most of all icanandwillsavemoney WELL DONE!!!!!!!!!!!! Fab that you have spoken to the boss and he's been supportive (or she) and given advice. Are you still speaking to the union re the situation? Would be a good idea, esp how tight things are, to investigate whether a dmp is a good idea? As for the X I personally would have no qualms not paying him until you are in a better position financially - not out of malace but because you dont really have the money and would be best to pay ones with interest being added on...
Very proud of you for tackling this though!!

MyLastFiver

Go girl!!!!!!!!

theunknownstuntman

Icanandwillsavemoney - you're more than welcome to receive my 2p worth of advice! We're not all horrible like this idiot, comsider yourself well shut of him and move on., The right guy is out there for you.

ISOM - where you been??? lol, missed you on the sealed pot thread, I've been a bit busy! And you know me, always willing to help a damsel in distress.

This place really gives me a warm feeling of family sometimes. The way people support and help each other via this odd medium of t'internet. I'm proud to be a member of this forum.

In_Search_Of_Me

I's here stunty!! Aint been nowhere but only post occ on sealed pot and struggle just to keep up with my subscribed threads!! Also have a diary which ou are more than welcome to pop into!!
Know how you love to help them damsels...!!
Sorry for hijack - how you doing ICAWSM?

Icanandwillsavemoney

Quick update - no reply from solicitors!

Next part of my plan to become debt free....

I have read loads and loads and have done a budget planner and also a snowball calculator so really happy with that.

Have a debt free date of December 2011 so not that far off.

My next question is how do I increase my income? I need to raise enough to pay for birthdays and Xmas. I have explained to my daughter and 2 'grown up' sons that it will be a more personal gift giving time as opposed to cost giving!! They were fine about it. DD always loves what she gets and is never greedy but lads are the designer types so for them to ok it was a great outcome... maybe I worry far too much about disappointing them!

I am doing daily clicks on Quidco and also Pigsback. I don't have much for eBay or Amazon.

So any guidance would be great.

Thanks in advance.