Fibromyalgia (part 2)

purplecatlover

and having just seen carefuls reply... my friends, then7 and 8 year olds called the police the first ti me they actually saw their father hit their mother. she kicked him out after that.

bigzippy

Kass I am quite frankly in shock :shocked: That's unreal. And completely out of order. I can't believe he told a 5yr old to eff off! :shocked: And no I don't think you did mention the damage he'd done to you...more than likely cos you know what we'd say! :rolleyes: I'm with pcl (and Cwta) on the violence thing. My dad was far too volatile and violent - more than he likely realises - and my mother recently said that she didn't realise it had had/would have this much of an affect on us. It does. Get them out.

Cwta I'm either really hungry or I feel sick and can't touch food for at least an hour after I wake up. And no, the "friend" really doesn't understand the concept. :cool:

kassandra

I just wanted everything to work out this time. I wanted my kids to have a proper family. The older two grew up without a father in the house and I just wanted to do things right this time. I just sat the younger two down and talked to them about it (it advises you to do that on the refuge website) DD2 said she feels that she is to blame and that she must have done something wrong.

My cousin rang the police the night it happened (she works for them) cos I ran round to her house. They came and took a statement and photo's. They arrested him, kept him overnight then released him without charge. Apparently cps didn't think it was worth pursuing as I admitted in my statement that I wasn't exactly sure of the event's as it happened so fast and he said that I attacked him. He then started gloating saying that they didn't believe me.

The house is in his name and he said he would leave once he had saved enough money and let me take it over but he's getting funny about that now and started shouting yesterday that he wanted me to leave. I can't wait for him to save enough money anyway cos I just can't cope with his level of aggression anymore.

Thanks guys. It helps hearing from people who have experienced it from a childs point of view. I think I may contact refuge to talk about my options. I really don't want to go in a hostel/refuge if I have other options cos they are usually in carppy area's and you may have to share with other families. I think that might be too much for the kids. Plus most don't allow you to bring pets and I can't let Charlie go.

LameWolf

I was just going to stick my head round the door and wave as I'm not feeling at all well today.

Can't just read'n'run without offering a ((((HUG)))) to Kass though..... Been there, done that, got the T-shirt. Only difference was there weren't littl'uns involved. Hope you can get away from the bar-steward soon, mate, for your sake and the kids.

purplecatlover

do ring the refuge kass. also ring the council housing. point out that you dont feel safe there anymore, that he is hasling you to move out, and that the kids are getting affected by it and see if they can get you somewhere fast, hopefully in a not terrible area if they wont help come up with first months rent etc.

(hit post too soon) and good luck, and well done on talking to the little uns about it too, thats hard to do.

bigzippy

I've just been out to sit in my garden for 5 mins and actually said "Ha!" outloud at the dandelions lying forlorn and dying on the patio after I pulled em out yesterday

I also like the sight of birds and such....but must they be so noisy with their mating calls etc?

bigzippy

P.s. I'm going for my free lawnmower soon! Yay!! :j

kassandra

You like the sight of birds lying forlorn and dying on your patio! :eek:
:D:D:D:D

Rang the womens aid place cos it said they have houses where you can take pets. They don't have any available atm but she said I can go on waiting list and if I did need to leave before then, they have fosterers for pets. She also told me that credit union do loans specifically for deposits on private rentals so I'm gonna go check that out tomorrow. All in all a very productive call

bigzippy

kassandra wrote: »

You like the sight of birds lying forlorn and dying on your patio! :eek:

Well there is that too...




P.s. That really was a joke!!

Careful_with_that_Axe

kass, that sounds like very hopeful and good progress. Like lw, my 1st XOH was violent and, unfortunately, I got not support from the Police as he was a police officer himself.
You can always go back to the police and cite the time they were called, say he is still being threatening and agressive to and in front of the children as well as you.

Otherwise, the woman's refuge will be able to advise how you can keep safe until you can get out of the situation.

Do please stay in touch on here - you're not alone, you do not deserve to be treated like this and none of what is happening is your fault. We're all behind you as sounding boards/moral support or whatever you need.

And I'll keep my Axe handy *g*