MSE Pregnancy Club V

shellsuit

feelinggood wrote: »

Hehe, I'm not going to be a mad lady and just run out with my baby, but I'm going to be pretty insistant that I not go to the ward unless absolutely nessercary. Hopefully they'll be alright with it, I know it can be done (thats what my Mum did). Sort of a compromise - as I'm not allowed a home birth, I'll deliver in hospital, but unless there is any real reason, I won't stay - if you know what I mean.

You might have been able to do it then, but that was over 20 years ago and a lot of things have changed since then, so don't get your hopes up!

feelinggood_2

shellsuit wrote: »

You might have been able to do it then, but that was over 20 years ago and a lot of things have changed since then, so don't get your hopes up!

I shall ask the MW next time I see her (although she doesn't work at the hospital, so would I be better asking someone actually at the hospital?).

Its mainly just a reassurance thing - they can't make me stay there, I can leave if I want to. The thought of being 'locked up' somewhere doesn't make me feel very good about giving birth! I need to know that I can leave whenever I want. Chances are I won't, and I'll be happy to stay, but a lot of my anxiety is to do with loss of power, being violated and controlled, and I can't imagine that panic attacks are good things to have in labour!

angelfairy

feelinggood wrote: »

I'm jotting down some notes for my birth plan, can anyone remember what else I want to put on it?

Main things are:
No-one to touch me without asking me (each and every time)
No injections or procedures without explaining what they are
My word on pain relief is final

Thats all that is really important to me, and all related to being voilated. Because I've got PTSD and this is the first time I've ever done anything medically, I really don't want to be extra traumatised by having people doing things to me. Is there anything else I should write down to be safe? Does that make sense?

hi feely,

forgive me for being quick but about to dash to my MW appt

the MW at my parentcraft class on the weekend said that under NO circumstances can they give you any type of needle without your permission and explaining the need for it beforehand. It is your body and for them to !!!!! your skin without your consent is assault.

all procedures and the reasons they are required should be explained to you also.

the hopsital where you are going is one of the ones i could have chosen and a colleauge has given birth there with with no complaints.

HTH

tarajayne

feelinggood wrote: »

Hehe, I'm not going to be a mad lady and just run out with my baby, but I'm going to be pretty insistant that I not go to the ward unless absolutely nessercary. Hopefully they'll be alright with it, I know it can be done (thats what my Mum did). Sort of a compromise - as I'm not allowed a home birth, I'll deliver in hospital, but unless there is any real reason, I won't stay - if you know what I mean.

I'm sure you've posted it somewhere that I've missed but why can't you have a HB?

astonsmummy

Anyone applying for the SSMG apparently the backlog is 4 weeks ATM.
Just spoke to a very rude and abrupt lady on the phone and she said anyone who reckons they have received it within a week or 2 is a liar! :rotfl: why would someone lie about that?
I asked her to check the system and she huffed then done it with such an attitiude! thing is I was told the same about the MA and I'm getting my payments this week so I aint gonna really rely on what she says, (and no I didnt tell her that)
God people like that really pi$$ me off! why be so rude, if you dont like your job, get another one :rolleyes:

shellsuit

feelinggood wrote: »

I shall ask the MW next time I see her (although she doesn't work at the hospital, so would I be better asking someone actually at the hospital?).

Its mainly just a reassurance thing - they can't make me stay there, I can leave if I want to. The thought of being 'locked up' somewhere doesn't make me feel very good about giving birth! I need to know that I can leave whenever I want. Chances are I won't, and I'll be happy to stay, but a lot of my anxiety is to do with loss of power, being violated and controlled, and I can't imagine that panic attacks are good things to have in labour!

I'd ask at the hospital AND the midwife, just to see if you get the same answer (and neither of them are just pandering to your question)

They can't make you stay there, but if there is a problem with the baby, they can make the baby stay there.

Would you really get your stuff and go and leave the baby at the hospital??

It's not that you're locked up, it's other people who are locked out.

Have a word with your midwife - ask her to jot it all down in your notes so that whoever you get on the day can get the jist of what it is you want and are afraid of x

Sami_Bee

Feelie I imagine you migh be a bit like one of the women that came onto the ward I was on, she walked on pushing bubs (they make you do it as only you are allowed to take ur baby anywhere) closed the curtains around her bed and about 10 mins later opened them to reveal her and baby dressed ready to go. If she ask one MW if they knew how much longer the paediatrician was going to be she must of asked 50!!
The paediatrician arrived after about an hour to do his checks and discharged her and she was off!
I'd got chatty to the woman next to me and we were chuckling away about it saying she must have left the iron on or something :rotfl:
I was in for 2 nights and my friend 4 or 5 coz she'd had a section.

feelinggood_2

tarajayne wrote: »

I'm sure you've posted it somewhere that I've missed but why can't you have a HB?

Well, technically they couldn't stop me having a home birth, but I'm so incredibly fat that the consultant would, under no circumstances, recommend it - it would be very, very dangerous because I'd bleed too much, I'd likely need a C-Section, the baby might get stuck because of fat on my hips etc.

I know it seems strange, but I just have to know that I can leave. Like I said, I'd be very unlikely to, I just need to know I can. It is all totally irrational, but these things tend to be. Silly PTSD!

astonsmummy

I'd speak to the actual hospital, and maybe ask a few different people there.
I;m amazed at thw conflicting advice I ahve received throughout this pregnancy.

tarajayne

feelinggood wrote: »

Well, technically they couldn't stop me having a home birth, but I'm so incredibly fat that the consultant would, under no circumstances, recommend it - it would be very, very dangerous because I'd bleed too much, I'd likely need a C-Section, the baby might get stuck because of fat on my hips etc.

I know it seems strange, but I just have to know that I can leave. Like I said, I'd be very unlikely to, I just need to know I can. It is all totally irrational, but these things tend to be. Silly PTSD!

And neither would my consultant recommend it as its no.6 so I am at risk of bleeding. Don't get the fat on hips thing as I thought the fat was outside your hips? And why does being fat give you a higher risk of bleeding, mine is 'cos they say the womb may not contract in the same way so I just overdose on raspberry leaf to tone it up. Sorry, lots of questions but I'm just curious.