Black Dog of Depression - can we help each other?

happymumto2

whitevanwoman wrote: »

The most important thing though is that after you have been on ESA for 13 weeks, you become eligible to claim mortgage benefit. They will only pay the interest on your mortgage and not cover any repayment of the loan so you will have to arrange to convert your mortgage to interest only but your mortgage provider should allow you to do that because of your circumstances. I don't know much info yet about mortgage benefit but it has been a huge relief to me to know that even if I get a month or two behind with my payments, it won't get any worse than that before I become eligible for mortgage benefit.

So you need to claim ESA - I don't know the telephone number off hand but you should be able to find it online if you google Employment and Support Allowance new claim. If your SSP has run out (even though you are still getting sick pay from your employer) you should be eligible. You might need to contact your employer to get them to confirm when your SSP runs out although they should write to you to inform you but its worth chasing as you can backdate an ESA claim to the date that your SSP ran out. My employer took 3 weeks to inform me that my SSP ran out but my ESA was backdated.

I was signed off at the beginning of Feb and my SSP ran out in mid August so it sounds like your SSP has probably run out by now, or you are very close to the 26 weeks.

Good luck, get an ESA claim in, I've heard alot of bad stuff about ESA but so far my claim has been straightforward and the main thing is that it is a qualifying benefit for mortgage benefit. Once you know you only have to wait 13 weeks to get some help with your mortgage, alot of the financial pressure and worry will be relieved.

If this is true then that is brilliant! I did the 45 minute telephone application for ESA on Wednesday as that is the day my SSP ran out. However the woman told me that while I am entitled to ESA I cannot get the mortgage help as I am still classed as employed, even though my half pay wont cover the mortgage payment. She then rang the tax credits when I was on phone and said they now class me as unemployed (even though I am still employed!) and I can no longer claim childcare element of tax credits even though my children still attend incase I do get well enough to go back to work. My youngest has been off school all week as I just cannot walk him to school.

whitevanwoman

happymumto2 wrote: »

If this is true then that is brilliant! I did the 45 minute telephone application for ESA on Wednesday as that is the day my SSP ran out. However the woman told me that while I am entitled to ESA I cannot get the mortgage help as I am still classed as employed, even though my half pay wont cover the mortgage payment. She then rang the tax credits when I was on phone and said they now class me as unemployed (even though I am still employed!) and I can no longer claim childcare element of tax credits even though my children still attend incase I do get well enough to go back to work. My youngest has been off school all week as I just cannot walk him to school.

Uh-oh! I'm worried now! No-one has said anything to me about not qualifying for mortgage benefit because I am still employed but long term sick. By the time I qualify for mortgage benefit, my half pay from work will have run out so the only income I will be getting is ESA. If I don't qualify because I am technically employed, my only option will be to resign from my job and I can't believe that in order to claim benefits whilst off sick, I would be forced to resign from a job which isn't paying me anything. The benefits system is a nightmare, different rules for different agencies. I am still trying to track down my payslips which I sent in over a month ago and which haven't been returned and which I need for Council Tax benefit. It's more stressful being signed off and on benefit than it is being at work.

I'm going to see what I can find online about mortgage benefit and ESA etc and will let you know. I suggest that if possible you try to go to Citizens Advice and ask them to clarify as usually they are very good about benefits etc. I would go but I live in a rural area and it is a 40 mile round trip to my nearest CAB. Let me know if you find out any more info and if I find out any useful info online I will post some links here. I struggle using the telephone and live on my own so there is no-one who can ring ESA for me to find out more info.

I'm trying to wade through the medical questionnaire which is about a 30 page booklet asking for info about the illness and how it affects you. I have been advised to send supporting letters from my CPN in with the medical questionnaire too. I've also been given a copy of "The big book of mental health benefits" which is an absolute godsend. It gives loads of help on how to answer the questions as sometimes I don't even realise that some of the things I do/don't do are symptoms of anxiety and depression. You can buy the book online http://www.benefitsinmind.org.uk/big_book_2008.htm

It costs £15 but I would say that is money well spent as it is an excellent book and up to date. CAB should be able to help you when you have to fill in the medical form and might have a copy of the book which you can have a look at. Let me know if you can't get hold or afford a copy of it, and I could photocopy and post the relevant pages to you.

Hope the ESA claim goes through ok. Let me know how you get on, sounds like we are both in the same situation.

Pauper_Princess

Hi all, I've never read this thread before - never normally venture this far down the list of forums so I didn't know it existed!

Haven't read the whole thread yet but something here on this page caught my eye, about SAD - thriftyscotslass have you tried the light boxes? I got mine from Outside In, they're a bit pricy but so far it seems to be working. You can get ones to use for longer periods during the day for about £115 I think, I had to get a more powerful one to use in the morning before I go to work and it was a bit more than that!! But so far (only been using it 3 weeks or so - I get up early!) it's making it a little easier to actually face the day, am not feeling so resentful of the fact that I won't see daylight for a few months before long!

My depression kicked back in last year but have put off going to the docs so far, the AD's I went on last time did nothing at all to be honest so Plus the GP I liked has left and only one reamining now who is horrible, really unsympathetic and difficult to talk to at the best of times!!!

Hope I might be able to talk to you all again soon

PP x

System

welcome to the thread Pauper_Princess

Re: GP would it be worth trying to find a new doctors surgery if there is another near by?

Not much to update myself...had a bit of a weird week mood has been up and down like nobody's business and to add to that there's definitely some PMT too *must...not...break...things*

But its my birthday tomorrow (23) so i'll be putting on a brave face and trying to enjoy the day

thriftyscotslass

Hi Pauper Princess and welcome :wave:

I haven't tried a lightbox - unfortunately £115 is a bit out of my league at the moment but I'll keep a look out at car boots, etc, maybe try and pick one up second-hand.

Well it's a new week folks and a good start, managed to get up at 7 this morning :T. This week is going to be better, in the end I slept in till noon twice last week and 11 once - not good :eek:.

This morning's plans are a housework, followed by a visit to post office and bank. Will pop back in later to catch up.

Luv Thriftyxxx

LameWolf

Hello Pauper Princess; welcome!

xXMessedUpXx wrote: »

Re: GP would it be worth trying to find a new doctors surgery if there is another near by?

PP, I'd agree with this; I changed surgeries because I didn't get along with my GP (she was extremely judgemental because I was sterilised without ever having children) and I now have a reasonably good GP. You don't have to put up with a GP you can't stand - vote with your feet!

thriftyscotslass wrote: »

Well it's a new week folks and a good start, managed to get up at 7 this morning :T. This week is going to be better.

:T:T:T Well done!

MessdUp as I'm quite literally old enough to be your mother, I am telling you to enjoy your day today. And tomorrow. And the day after that.......:o

Folks, I didn't reply on any of the ESA posts because I know nothing about it; been on IB for the last decade:( I wasn't ignoring you all, I just didn't feel it appropriate to stick my oar in when I didn't have anything really to contribute.:o

crazy_girl

hey, been crying/sleeping/throwing up all weekend. gonna go docs with my hubby friday, need something to get me over this bad period. i need to get out and make some money or we are gonna end up in debt not being able to pay the rent and stuff! i reckon after this week i might be able to manage 2-3 days of work a week if my doc prescribes me anti pyschotics to get over this like he did last time.

Pauper_Princess

Thanks all for your welcomes everyone

Re the changing GPs, yes I need to look into this again, I started looking into it a few months ago but didn't get far :rolleyes:

Today was a bad day, real c***py day at work so was straight on the wine when I got in and it's only Monday!!! Am struggling to cope with everyday stuff right now and its beginning to show at work - you'd think a good bawling down by a manager would work but really couldn't care less.

messedup - hope you manage to enjoy at least a little of your day - I hate birthdays - mine was week before last, sadly not 23 :rotfl:

Hope everyone manages to have a half-decent week, or at least day. Really need to sort out my GP and do something about this.

PP x

thriftyscotslass

crazy_girl - good idea to take hubby with you to docs, sometimes the moral support of another person is really helpful.

pauper princess - sorry about your cr*p day at work. I'll lift a glass of red to you tonight.

I have also had a stressful evening. Went to see the mother tonight after about 6 weeks of no contact. Brother is an alcoholic and mother is his codependent enabler. Father died of alcoholism 21 years ago. Things came to a head 6 weeks ago and I decided I had had enough of the chaotic alcoholic drama and left them to get on with it.

Well I spent the evening hammering in my boundaries - no, I would not be helping out my brother any more, he was on his own; no - I would no longer be available for hours of pointless discussions on how to fix him; no - I would no longer be family social events co-ordinator - in future people would be getting cards (with money in if I could afford it) and that would be it for Xmas and birthdays. Yipee, I can do bacon butties on Xmas day if that's what I want.

It doesn't leave us with much - saying hello in the street, talking about the weather on the phone but that suits me just fine - I've got quite enough to be going on with in my own family, thank you very much.

Funnily enough, my anxiety has lifted tonight - I'll let you know if it filters through to tomorrow.

Keep well guys, see you tomorrow, Thriftyxxx

crazy_girl

thrifty- thats a pretty difficult situation to be in but i think youve done the right thing, your brother wont get better while people are helping him to not hit rock bottom. i have a family member whose partner enables their alcoholism. ive had to cut off contact unfortunately.