Black Dog of Depression - can we help each other?

So_Sad_Angel

Hi All...can I just sit here & ramble on for a bit? I think that just typing might help.

This is my worst time of the day anyway but tonight I have felt that feeling of misery creeping all over me...its been getting progressively worse since this morning. I`ve got severe depression & usually try to post lighthearted posts that hide how I really feel, but I am sat here in tears...difficult to type when you`ve got a tissue in one hand & tears dripping on the keyboard...maybe I`ll get an electric shock & that`ll finish me off. I dare`nt sleep as I wake with panic attacks in the night & cant breathe.

I thought I was doing so well holding it all together & had been having a few `good` days. I dread when these bad lows start & knowing Im in for a rough few days/weeks makes it all too much.

I`m on meds /sleeping pills that clearly dont work & been referred to Mental Health Team...I`m just so very tired of feeling this way.

A previous poster wrote ..`when you hit rock bottom its hard to see the light`...thats just where I feel I am !

Sorry to go on...I ache all over & spent ages putting this down...I hope that by trying to get how I feel on here it may be like `self therapy`.

Cx

flossy_splodge

Hey, so sad angel, here's hugs for you :grouphug:
Try keeping some music playing quietly or the TV in the background - I find it helps. At least you might drift off for a bit.
God Bless.

So_Sad_Angel

Thanks Flossy...somehow it helps to know that there are others about at this hour.

I do have dvd/radio on as recently I am convinced I hear noises when I know there are none....if there were my real dogs would disturb very easily & so if I have dvd then it stops me getting more upset.

I`m rambling on...sorry

Going to take another pill to help me sleep....I know I`ll feel rotten in the morning but I feel that most days anyway. Nite

LameWolf

Hi, So Sad Angel.

I hope you finally managed to get some sleep. You mention some real life dogs - what sort are they? I'm being a nosey wotsit, but I love dogs, and still miss my little Penny like mad (she passed away in 2002). I think a pet can be such a comfort.

Wishing you better days than you've obviously been having.

black_paw

i have Doey my little hamster !

LameWolf

Jamla wrote: »

i have Doey my little hamster !

Awww bless. I've kept gerbils before, but not hamsters.

Here's hoping everyone has a good weekend (I prob won't get online again til Monday or possibly Tuesday). Keep them Black Dogs on a short leash people.

black_paw

and dosed with capol

black_paw

must be weather even i took a pill last night , makes you so zombie the next day , meet up with old workmate for coffee in the afternoon , shop closed down 2 years ago . nice to have natter about things that went on , could write a book , we both felt better afterwards , and limped of in to the sunset !

So_Sad_Angel

Hi folks...felt rubbish this morning !!! dont recommend extra sleeping pills however did get a disturbed 6 hours...but thats very good for me.

Well LameWolf my 3 real dogs are sheepdogs & to be honest they get me up in the morning & give me purpose. I know they are so clever they even know my moods & I swear that they make quieter barks when they know I`m bad.

Jamla...Ive never owned a hamster...had mice at last house!!! (wild ones!!) drove dogs insane but at least I felt wanted!!!
Wish I had energy to catch up with friends...I get the invites but somehow always cancel at last minute as I feel I can`t muster the energy or feel too ill.

Wish this illness was`nt so unpredictable!!

Anyway...light relief tonight & hope that I can relax to try & sleep without the `black dog` howling keeping me awake.

Angiex

black_paw

think over done it today again ,, all bones feeling about to snap ! dog is asleep dead like, for the day after howling all day yesterday ..as been waiting outcome of IB , had medical Jan 22 , not heard anything yet at all , was brave and rang them , not had the results back yet , and can take up to 6 months !! oh yeah !! ring back in a couple of months ! bye ! poor dog died on the spot ! well least i know . well of to bed now xx hugs all round