Worked for 20 years now staying home to bring up children - help

briona

cw18 wrote: »

She askd if she could claim JSA (though the post does read as if she thought she couldn't), and ends with a comment that she's just applied for LHA

Neither of these relate to the children -- they're both a direct result of her chosing to stay at home !!!

I read the OP's post as simple enquiry as to what she might be entitled to claim. Knowing how much you are going to have to live on is simply good financial planning so why the need for all the backlash?!

Of course if she had said "I'm having a baby and want to go back to work 6 weeks after the birth", she'd be slammed by people demanding to know why she was having children if she "couldn't be bothered to look after them" (as indeed I have seen on other threads).

Unfortunately whatever decision the OP makes, she'll be accused of doing the wrong thing – SAHMs will b*tch about her putting money before her children if she goes back to work and working mothers will complain about her living off their taxes if she stays at home. But what's right for one woman may not suit another – live and let live.

cw18

Personally I never judge anyone by their choice to be a SAHP or a working parent -- it's what works best for the family unit as a whole.

I started work when my DD was 10 months old (late 1984), and continued working I was made redundant November 2008. For me, I'd have gone mental being tied to a house and children all day back then -- especially as it would have meant very little change of scenery for me (my face didn't "fit" in the baby groups where we lived, as I was a young single Mum which the other Mums there didn't like one little bit).

I'm now seriously considering taking up child-minding later this year, even though my youngest is 17.5 meaning I'm not tied to the house at all -- but am using the first 6 months of 2009 to 'find my feet' following the death of my DH (8 days before I lost my job). I'm also looking after my GDs around school (term-time only), which means I'm getting more of a feel as to whether I'm better suited to be home with children now I'm older (at the moment I would say I am as I have a lot more patience -- but only time will tell).

Petite

Marker wrote: »

Wy do people chose benefits as alifestyle choice? Thats the worst education you can show your children.

Il carry on being a mug and working whilst paying out for you to stay at home.

Maybe I should just borrow money from credit cards etc to live - erm is that a good education for my children ? :rotfl: I'm now getting the feeling you are commenting purely to wind up.

Petite

Thanks to all those with supportive comments - There is some really good advice here. I am very good at budgeting and as I say we have no debts so I don't need to get my child benefit weekly. I'm in no real need for the LHA money yet so will hold off on that for an emergency situation if needed. As for the CTC - I don't feel guilty claiming them, my husband is the lower earner and he wants to support his family, I'm happy economising to allow us to do that. (by continuing to wash all my own nappies as I have done from the start, get around without a car. etc to name only a couple) There are some sacrifices worth every penny.

Petite

tinkerbell84 wrote: »

Erm, you've earned more than £40k for 20 years (plus whatever your husband earns) and you don't have savings to be able to afford 2 children? :eek:

How affluent was your lifestyle?!

Lived a good life holidays, cars etc and have a minimal morgage and no debts. Now prepared to settle for much much less to be a SAHM

Petite

BOBS wrote: »

I took up childminding - still at home for my own children but making some extra money at the same time - has worked out really well for me.

That is a fabulous idea - any advice on how I would go about doing that correctly ? Do I need official training or qualification ? e.g first aid, How do I get registered ?

cw18

You need to contact your local Social Services (I think). A friend is about to start talking me through it as she is already registered. There are some 'courses' you need to attend and you will need to pass the first aid one. You also have to have a police check -- as will your DH and anyone else 16 or over who stays at your house for more than 7 nights.

There is some information I turned up here via Google (not my area, but I would imagine pretty standard)

As a word of warning -- there is a lot of paperwork that has to be done, and my friend find it takes her a couple of hours every weekend to get on top of it now..... with changes involving even more about to come on-line too !!!

Oldernotwiser

cw18 wrote: »

As a word of warning -- there is a lot of paperwork that has to be done, and my friend find it takes her a couple of hours every weekend to get on top of it now..... with changes involving even more about to come on-line too !!!

If the OP has been in a high powered job, I doubt she'll have a problem with the paperwork for childminding!

tinkerbell84

Petite wrote: »

Lived a good life holidays, cars etc and have a minimal morgage and no debts. Now prepared to settle for much much less to be a SAHM

Glad to hear it. Not sure why tax payers should pay towards it though

(not a dig at you - the system needs radically changing)

cw18

Oldernotwiser wrote: »

If the OP has been in a high powered job, I doubt she'll have a problem with the paperwork for childminding!

My friend doesn't think she'll have a problem with what it entails -- just the extra time she needs to take away from her own children in order to complete it !! She already uses a lot of her evenings (after her boys are in bed) to do 'quiet' housework and get ready for the next day of minding.

If I go this route it's not too bad for me, as my youngest is 17. My other two (19 and 25) have moved out, although the 19 year old will have to be police checked as he's home on leave from the Army several times a year.......