Worked for 20 years now staying home to bring up children - help

duchy

I too worked for many years before having a child-like you my husband was a higher tax bracket earner (if yours isn't and you are the primary earner maybe HE could stay home and you go out to work ?) and despite having paid tax NI yadda yadda we were emtitled to almost nothing in benefits-and that was fine-as you say it's the parent's choice to have children and pay to raise them-it on ly becomes the state's responsibility if the parents can't. My circumstances then changed and from a position of affluence I went to barely been able to work as I was the primary carer to one terminally ill family member and a child just diagnosed with a disability-and a scarpering husband who couldn't stand the pressure of it all. That's when "payback" happened and when I was entitled to assistance and very thankful I was for it too !
We pay taxes and those benefits become our safetynet when the unforseen or unthinkable happen-not just "usual living".

tinkerbell84

duchy wrote: »

I too worked for many years before having a child-like you my husband was a higher tax bracket earner (if yours isn't and you are the primary earner maybe HE could stay home and you go out to work ?)

I was gonna suggest this too

cw18

wornoutmumoftwo wrote: »

You get get CB and CTC paid weekly, which I find better to manage then the four weekly payments

My understanding is that CB will only be paid weekly if you are a single parent or on means tested benefits.

When I recently applied to have it restarted (younger DS started a college course in September, having had a year off due to major issues at home and him not being able to cope with that on top of college -- he tried but pulled out in November '07) we had to have it 4-weekly because I was in work, even though DH was on IB and DLA.

By the time they awarded it (mid-December) I had lost both my DH and my job. I'm still not entitled to means tested benefits (too much coming in from an Occupational Pension scheme, and Widowed Parents Allowance on top of that), but they have changed it to weekly after I phoned and informed them of DH's death as I am now a single parent.

cw18

duchy wrote: »

We pay taxes and those benefits become our safetynet when the unforseen or unthinkable happen-not just "usual living".

Totally agree :T


As to who stays home with the children -- I'd definitely consider letting Dad do it if that's more financially beneficial and the main desire is to have them raised by a parent. Or the other possibilities are for you both to work part-time or in jobs that entail different hours.

DH and I both used to work full-time for the same company, but in different sections, using a combination of childcare over the years (child-minder, nursery, and people we employed during school holidays -- plus grand-parents for before and after school). When both jobs were looking very insecure my DH took voluntary redundancy, which then meant I could take a job with a lengthy commute (3 hours/day instead of 40 mins) while he was home around school and in the holidays. Then a couple of years later (when our eldest finshed her GCSEs) we moved areas to cut down on my commute -- and DH went out and found a job on permanent night shifts. As there are 5 years between my eldest and middle children (and 2 between middle and youngest), this meant we didn't disrupt schooling at a crucial point for any of them......

Marker_2

Wy do people chose benefits as alifestyle choice? Thats the worst education you can show your children.

Il carry on being a mug and working whilst paying out for you to stay at home.

BOBS

I gave up work after 2nd child was born and havent regretted a moment of it. Now had three children (ages 9, 6 and 4). I took up childminding - still at home for my own children but making some extra money at the same time - has worked out really well for me.
All the best with your decision. It was one of the most difficult I made!!
Dont get me wrong many days I would love to be heading to work to get away from the kids and have more adult company but mainly I do love it and I am so glad I was able to be at home. I wont say financially that it has been easy but the childminding has helped massively!

wornoutmumoftwo

Wy do people chose benefits as alifestyle choice? Thats the worst education you can show your children.

hi marker,

I don't think anyone on here has chosen benefits over work - I worked every day from when I was 16 up to and shortly after having my first child (16 years). When my youngest begins school I will be looking for part time work to help supplement the low wage that my husband brings home.

My understanding is that CB will only be paid weekly if you are a single parent or on means tested benefits.

I didn't realise this, at the time I asked for weekly the child tax credit people were paying us £0.00 per wek due to their incorect administartion, (which took over 6 months to fix), and my husband was temporaily out of work so we were on very, very low money for a couple of months.

Marker_2

wornoutmumoftwo wrote: »

hi marker,

I don't think anyone on here has chosen benefits over work - I worked every day from when I was 16 up to and shortly after having my first child (16 years). When my youngest begins school I will be looking for part time work to help supplement the low wage that my husband brings home.

Well it is if your not working but claiming benefits, it is a choice! The OP has avery bad attitude, which can be seen in the title of this thread .. as if someone owes her and her family?

I think its sending out the wrong message and affecting those who really need it badly. People should thin about that big time before going down that route. Ithink its such a shame people chose todo this sometimes.

MY opinions on SAHM are very s trong, Ithink all women should be at home with the kids, Ireally do, but not to theaffect of the economy, strive todo better so you can, IMO

wornoutmumoftwo

I claim Child Benefit which I am entitled to because my children are UNDER 16
as per HM Revenue & Customs

Child Tax Credit;
Child Tax Credit (CTC) is for families who are responsible for at least one child or qualifying young person. You should claim if you have a child or qualifying young person who usually lives with you. You do not have to be working to claim CTC.

Working Tax Credit;
Working Tax Credit is paid to the person who is working 16 hours or more a week


These are the benefits we receive; (CB/WTC/CTC)
We live in a house that we own (we worked hard and paid it off).
My husband works a 40 hour week
We do not get help with Council Tax, Income Benefit etc etc

The benefits we recieve are for my children. The benefits the OP is enquiring about relates to her child and the one on the way.

cw18

wornoutmumoftwo wrote: »

The benefits the OP is enquiring about relates to her child and the one on the way.

She asked if she could claim JSA (though the post does read as if she thought she couldn't), and ends with a comment that she's just applied for LHA


Neither of these relate to the children -- they're both a direct result of her chosing to stay at home !!!