The giving up/cutting down alcohol support thread! Part 2

jo1972

Morning all

Feel absolute carp this morning, I packed away so much alcohol last night that I'm surprised my body didn't give up during the night. My arms and hands were completely numb when I woke up and I feel sick which is unlike me, don't normally drink enough to feel this ill. Had a really bad evening with OH and DD1 rowing all night. She's a teenager and he worries about her but in her eyes it's all 'just so UNFAIR!' (said in a Kevin and Perry pose), she ended up storming out I got the brunt of it cos I was still here and then got it in the ear all night....not an excuse but needless to say I drank myself to oblivion and I'd be really surprised if he didn't notice as I was actually losing my balance a lot, plus my speech was starting to get affected. He didn't say anything though.

Somethings got to give, I'm killing myself, wasting away my life and my kids childhoods, I can't carry on the way I am. There is no way on this earth I can just have 1 drink like some of you. If I decided this evening that I'd buy 1 can to have with dinner I would just be in a blind panic from the moment I'd bought it, panicking about when to open it cos I know it's not enough, it would make me so uneasy and panicky that I'd rather not bother....so I know I can't do that and I realise that I can't carry on drinking up to 6 cans a night, so it's got to stop (finally the penny drops, I can hear you say :rolleyes:)

So I shall be firmly on the wagon this evening, plus if my memory serves me correct I think I'm on 7 days this month which means if I go AF for the rest of this month then that makes 14/28, half a month is quite an achievement for me. I should only think of a day at a time though, but I definately can't do this anymore.

Cue a choklit and ice cream shop

xx

fedupandskint

jo1972 wrote: »

Somethings got to give, I'm killing myself, wasting away my life and my kids childhoods, I can't carry on the way I am. There is no way on this earth I can just have 1 drink like some of you. If I decided this evening that I'd buy 1 can to have with dinner I would just be in a blind panic from the moment I'd bought it, panicking about when to open it cos I know it's not enough, it would make me so uneasy and panicky that I'd rather not bother....so I know I can't do that and I realise that I can't carry on drinking up to 6 cans a night, so it's got to stop (finally the penny drops, I can hear you say :rolleyes:)

So I shall be firmly on the wagon this evening, plus if my memory serves me correct I think I'm on 7 days this month which means if I go AF for the rest of this month then that makes 14/28, half a month is quite an achievement for me. I should only think of a day at a time though, but I definately can't do this anymore.

Mornin' Jo, Sorry to read how you feel today - poor you and what you are finding difficult to cope with at home.

I have felt physically like that a few months ago after a heavy night out and reality kicked in that I couldn't go on like this anymore and behave in this manner and feel the **** after effects as much as I was again. I never wanted to feel like that again. I haven't since end Oct 08.

Come on Jo! - go for AF for the rest of the month - your body might reject how you want to feel and it might be hard for you. If you hang in there it will get better and you will feel better, even if it is just a teeny weeny bit. It's a step closer to your goal.

This is my first AF weekend I can remember in a long time, I might have had one or more in the last 3 years but I can't say when for certain and it feels good today to be AF and not feel a bit bleary headed even after 2-3 glasses of white wine

jjef

graemecarter wrote: »

My point of view is that stopping alcohol is a very difficult thing to achieve long term. Thus when the will power has gone a little bit after the end of January, people find it hard to stay stopped. Thus the poor posting this month.

completely agree with your comments, i am finding Feb harder to stay AF than Jan was and although I have not slipped back to all my old ways I am finding that I am drinking more than I have been intending and thus will not make my target however am feeling determined to be AF for the next 7 days and at least get close to it.

wb my total for the month so far is 12 AFD.

ms_london

RecoveringAlcoholic wrote: »

Runs away and hides.

:eek:

Haha! :rotfl: Ok, I asked for that. Maybe I should think before I write :rolleyes:

ms_london

jo1972 wrote: »

Morning all

Feel absolute carp this morning, I packed away so much alcohol last night that I'm surprised my body didn't give up during the night. My arms and hands were completely numb when I woke up and I feel sick which is unlike me, don't normally drink enough to feel this ill. Had a really bad evening with OH and DD1 rowing all night. She's a teenager and he worries about her but in her eyes it's all 'just so UNFAIR!' (said in a Kevin and Perry pose), she ended up storming out I got the brunt of it cos I was still here and then got it in the ear all night....not an excuse but needless to say I drank myself to oblivion and I'd be really surprised if he didn't notice as I was actually losing my balance a lot, plus my speech was starting to get affected. He didn't say anything though.

Somethings got to give, I'm killing myself, wasting away my life and my kids childhoods, I can't carry on the way I am. There is no way on this earth I can just have 1 drink like some of you. If I decided this evening that I'd buy 1 can to have with dinner I would just be in a blind panic from the moment I'd bought it, panicking about when to open it cos I know it's not enough, it would make me so uneasy and panicky that I'd rather not bother....so I know I can't do that and I realise that I can't carry on drinking up to 6 cans a night, so it's got to stop (finally the penny drops, I can hear you say :rolleyes:)

So I shall be firmly on the wagon this evening, plus if my memory serves me correct I think I'm on 7 days this month which means if I go AF for the rest of this month then that makes 14/28, half a month is quite an achievement for me. I should only think of a day at a time though, but I definately can't do this anymore.

Cue a choklit and ice cream shop

xx

Hey.

Sorry to hear you arent feeling great and had a rubbish evening! Being the single and without kids variety, I cant even imagine how hard it must be at times to deal with stuff like that.

Like you say, it might be easier to give up completely than be a part-time drinker. Whatever feels right for you.

I hope you have a nice day & feel a bit better soon xx

Pippilongstocking

Hey Jo

Hugs my dear to you. Is there something in the air at the moment 'mid feb madness' or something. Have drank on both nights this weekend - and yeah not a glass or two - but a whole bottle each night - slept on sofa - I gave myself a weekend 'allowance' in my days so I wouldn't feel rubbish when I did drink -- but I really can't have one or two drinks either - its tonnes or nothing for me it seems.

No real excuses here - works stressy (but it always is) the kids are great we had such a lovely day and evening (I don't tend to start to drink until really late - 10-11pm cos they are about until then)

I found myself at midnight attacking the bread bin and making copious amounts of snacky food thinking to myself - I haven't had a midnight feast in a while - no brainer - I haven't had alot to drink in a while - doh. What a lunatic I am.

Rest of the wine went down the sink this morning. Definately no more for me this week that 's for sure - but to be honest - at least I keep telling myself at least I am not drinking every night anymore - but its still very hard - like you said Jo - one day at a time.

Hugs to you all - ignore my glumness its just due to female delightful hormones I think.

xx Hope the rest of you are all ok.

glasgowgirl

Hi everyone,

Jo - sorry to hear about your night, sounds awful. But also sounds like you've made a good decision today about the rest of the month. If you can do the 14 days, that'll be a fantastic achievement but, like you say, one day at a time.

I made a mistake last night . Met up with a friend who drinks a lot and just went with the flow - a bottle instead of a glass, taking wine into the cinema (yep, totally unnecessary) and then shared a bottle afterwards. So about 1.5 bottles I'd say.

I just let myself be lead, when I knew it wasn't what I really wanted. I'm really not sure why, felt quite tired and it was almost like I didn't have the energy to put up a fight or explain the cutting down thing. Just wanted a 'normal' night and to get home.

I've got a killer headache today, but mentally I'm not beating myself up about it. It proves what many people here have been saying - there's no such thing as just the 1.

AF today so that's 12 out of my 16 target. Will be AF til the end of the month now. Will need to start thinking about AF March.

To be honest, I'm seriously thinking it's time now to go for an AF life. I think it would be really life-enhancing and wonderful. Graeme C, MollyP, Bis and everyone else who has stopped drinking completely - you are all great ambassadors for an alcohol free life - keep posting!!!

xx

Miss_Piggy_2

Morning all

Seems a lot of us are struggling at the moment. I know its only because I feel so rough the last few days that I don't fancy a drink. At least I know I physically CAN'T have one for a while.

Jo1972 So much of what you say rings bells with me. I too can never buy just one can or have one glass of wine. Its like it hits a little trigger in my brain that immediately makes me keep going. I too wish I could be a "one drink with dinner" type of person.

Fayjmck - I can empathise with how you feel. I'm feeling a bit glum myself at the moment. Lets hope a bit of sunshine perks us all up.

Well, as for me.....I'm feeling a bit better today. Slept better last night and for the first time a month, little boy didn't come into our bed during the night. Head still completely stuffed up and feeling down and shattered...but at least I don't have a hangover. Thats a positive for me.

((hugs)) to everyone that needs them

Miss P
xx

beachbeth

Sorry you feel rubbish this morning, Jo. I do too.:o Ive got a really bad head and my throat hurts for some reason and Im so tired! Went out for a meal last night and I was good in that I stuck to Malibu, which is weaker than my usual vodka. I wasn't especially drunk but my headache is from Friday night when I did drink vodka.:o

Im endeavouring to stay AF until at least next weekend now. Im going to take my vit B and if I have a craving for a drink I will have one of the tablets my doc gave me cos they take the craving away. Im hoping I will feel a bit brighter in a couple of days if I do this.

ms_london wrote:

Society revolves around drinking, being drunk, getting drunk, laughing about your hangovers together, when infact it's not even funny! How the hell do you break from that mindset???

You watch any programme on tv and people are always drinking and in the pub (eg. Coro St and Eastenders)! I watch Doctors, which is on in the middle of the day and they are always sitting with glasses of wine or at work suffering with hangovers! Its always portrayed in a light-hearted and laughable way, which of course it definitely isn't.

jo1972

fayjmck wrote: »

I found myself at midnight attacking the bread bin and making copious amounts of snacky food thinking to myself - I haven't had a midnight feast in a while - no brainer - I haven't had alot to drink in a while

Hiya Fay and thanks everybody

I'm the opposite on the snack front, I tend to eat loads when I'm not drinking but the minute I have just one sip of alcohol my hunger has gone, I think I only ate 2 meals in the last week as I had 2 AF days, never eat an evening meal when I'm drinking. Made an amazing smoked haddock curried rice last night, kinda like a kedgeree but spicier, but didn't eat one bit of it, took an hour to prepare and gave it all to OH (no wonder he's complaining of needing to lose weight!). The only thing I will snack on when drinking is cheese balls, I LOVE cheese balls!!

Right, gonna get ready to go to Tesco, I've got mint feasts in the freezer from last week but have no choklit so I need to stock up. I've made up a 2litre bottle of orange squash which is in the freezer ready for when I get in and the decaf coffee is lined up ready to go! I almost feel liberated :undecided

Have a good afternoon and speak to you all later, no doubt I'll be around a lot as I won't be holed up in the kitchen getting plastered!

xx