advice please

bestpud

I don't think it is your children he needs to be worrying about!

What about his children and the lessons he is teaching them about manners, kindness and goodwill??

Cheeky git!! I could say more but I don't want to get myself banned! :mad: :mad: :mad:

terryw - :rotfl: That rhyme sounds just the job! :rotfl:

Honestly, some people!! I'm really annoyed for you, and your DH and children!

But take no notice - the man's a prat and knows nothing!

bestpud

Hawthorn wrote: »

I grew up in hard times, as did many of my friends - many of todays kids don't, and you know what I've noticed? They are all materialistic so and so's This is never, a good thing.
Thankfully, my kids have got their heads screwed on. My eldest can go shopping with £50 and buy several items of clothing. His more, um, well, spoiled friends, spend this on one pair of jeans alone!
Tell you know, they're going to be in for a fall if the economic situation escalates.
It's easier to raise your standard of living, than it is to lower it.
I think honestly, you are doing a GREAT thing by your kids, and it's refreshing to see (that's why I love this site LOL)
You are setting them up for a great future - they will probably cope wonderfully when they leave home, and will have a good idea about making ends meet.
Your BIL's children? I would hazard a guess, that they will come down to earth with a great big bump - how are they going to maintain that standard of living, when suddenly they have all of these bills to pay?
Our job as a parent, is not to spoil our children rotten with material items....it's essentially to prepare them for the big bad world out there, and it ain't easy.
You are teaching yours responsibility - he is teaching his children to be painful snobs (ouch - sorry, poor kids)
Yours will be more well adjusted. Damaging them mentally, my a*se.

Perhaps that's why they want such big gifts from others? Can't afford it themselves but want to save face by making sure their children still have lots of expensive gifts?

lowis

aw Deb - your family sound lovely - be proud of who you are and your immediate family, your BiL is an utter ar5e!

have a WONDERFUL christmas, I am sure you will :beer:

Hawthorn

bestpud wrote: »

Perhaps that's why they want such big gifts from others? Can't afford it themselves but want to save face by making sure their children still have lots of expensive gifts?

Aye, quite possibly. Unless their dad is Richard Branson or similar though, he's doing them no favours.

elona

If BIL made his money as a property developer or in a businesss that depends on house sales and a thriving economy then he is in for a severe shock very soon.

He sounds like the most ignorant git possible and I pity his family.

Your kids sound lovely and you should be very proud of how you are bringing them up.

Mutter_2

Your boys sound delightful Deb. You and your husband should be proud.

Wish you'd tell us more about that self deluded fool of a bil and how he came to be worth a million.

Could it be that he lives on credit, or that he cadges cash from his friends and relatives e.g for wedding food?

Mely

Your BIL sounds like a male version of Hyacinth Bouquet(sp)! Im absolutely gobsmacked!!!!
Ive bought most of my Christmas presents from Ebay this year,as i have done for the last few years. It just means i get more for my money.
Tell the materialistic f****r where to stick his Christmas list, and dont take anymore nonsense from him!
Have a Happy Christmas with your family ((((hugs)))) xxx

Mely

Also id have your life and your lovely family before his, and all his money any day!!! xxxx

Felicity

Deb, you sound like a lovely person who has had a really hard time of things recently and you do not need this emotional blackmail heaped onto your shoulders.

Please, please, please don't give it anymore thought. Do what you want to do gift wise for your family and be done with it.

I was so cross reading your original post. Do people like this really exist in the world today? As another MSEr said, he is likely to get a big shock soon.

I too wanted a really big fancy wedding with top hat, tails, fancy dress, magnificent surroundings etc (sorry, not very mse I know) and I wanted to invite all my family and friends, so I did, and I paid for it!

I also paid for the hire of all the bridesmaid / grooms outfits, my Mums outfit, my SIL (student) and helped anybody else out that couldn't afford to come. Again, sorry not very MSE, but that was my dream and so I paid for it (and BTW don't regret a single penny!).

I cannot imagine the sort of person that would put on an affair like that and then ask for payment! grrrrrr ... I can imagine a lot of people were feeling very badly towards them at that wedding! I have never hear of a posh wedding where the guests have to pay! What an idiot!

We have a good amount of money coming into our family at the moment, enough to pay the bills and have a good christmas HOWEVER, I like many people know this might not well continue and I have bought some lovely presents from ebay and from grabits thanks to this site. I have bought a lot of gifts that should have been £50+ but they have likely cost me £15! If somebody dictated to me how much to spend I would give them NOTHING and I would also explain the reason why.

Look at all the support you have had on this thread! You are definitely in the right and you are by far in the majority in your way of thinking!

I wish you all the best for a lovely Christmas and hope that the new year brings you a lot of health and happiness.

Grrrr ... still cross about that blooming idiot of your BIL and I don't even know of him! I bet he is a bundle of laughs in the home / workplace / with friends. I can imagine he is the type who has been withdrawing equity from his house over the last few years and 'thinks' he is loaded when in fact he isn't!

Felicity

Oh ... and also!!! Grrrr, still really mad after reading the OP ...

A 7 month old baby wants nothing more than a cuddle, some TLC and a box to play with! My 13 month old still wants nothing other than that and long may it continue!

If they are bringing their children up to be materialistic little muppets then just leave them to it, back out now and be glad to see the back of them!