advice please

itzmee

How rude is your BIL. A 3 year old does not need £50 spending on them nor does a 7 month old need £25 - it's easy enough to buy new toys at a reasonable price if ebay isn't good enough for him. If he was a half decent person then he would suggest not buying anything for them if funds were tight. Personally I would just buy them a tin of biscuits/chocolates (BOGOF and keep the other for yourselves:rolleyes: ) and something small for the children and explain that funds are low this year but you still wanted to get something. If he wants to spend £100 on you and hubby and £50 each for your sons then that's his prerogative. As for buying off ebay, well I always buy Xmas pressies for my kids off ebay and they end up with more than I could afford if I went brand new.

This morning my 5 year old son asked if Santa could afford to buy him a new flat screen tv, I replied no but he might stretch to some army toys and a dress up costume and he was delighted at that.

Triggles

I think I would give BIL and his family nothing and tell him "we didn't have that kind of money, so we gave you nothing, as we wouldn't want to INSULT you with anything substandard." Let him chew on that. We have emphatically told a few family members that were stressing over presents that we do NOT want them to spend their hard earned money on us - spending time with the family around Christmas is much more important to us. I would never ever tell people what I expect them to buy - it's so incredibly rude!! Even when MIL asks what would you like for Christmas - I'm just tongue tied - I don't like to answer - I try to think of something inexpensive as they're on a fixed income.

Anniek1969

I was just wondering what he will be spending on your presents. If there's you and DH and 3 kids then I would ask him for £100 for you and DH and £50 for each of the kids and then give him back the £175 he wants from you and it would leave you £75 up.

He obviously doesn't understand the meaning of christmas. The only adults I buy are my MIL and my brother and I buy the kids until they turn 18 and then I just buy them a small gift set around £5.

He should be grateful that you are buying him anything and as for your kids there is nothing wrong with buying off ebay. I have bought several items for my girls from ebay for christmas.

Triggles

On a second note - I can't believe they are saying you are scarring your kids by buying off ebay - for crying out loud! what a load of.... well, you know!

terryw

Why not print of a copy of these replies to your original post, and wrap them up in expensive paper (Andrex not Iza!) and give them to your BiL, with heartfelt suggestion from all at MSE that he shoves the whole package up his ars*! In fact persuade your kids to do a home-made Xmas card (MSE idea!) and insert the following verse:

I hope your Xmas is a good 'un
With lots of pressies and Christmas puddin'
Xmas presents are a bit of a farce
So shove this gift right up your...........

Oops I can't think of a rhyme, can anyone help?

terryw

AnnieM_3

terryw wrote: »

Why not print of a copy of these replies to your original post, and wrap them up in expensive paper and give them to your BiL, with heartfelt suggestion from all at MSE that he shoves the whole package up his ars*!

terryw

I second what Terry said! I'd include a second hand copy of a self help book on dealing with inferiority complexes too! :rotfl:

Sorry you have such a numpty for a relative!

AnnieM x

shoppaholic_returns

1. I must say,what a plonker your BIL must be!

2.How will your children know the gifts are from ebay if you dont tell them!

3. Does he want you to get in to terrible debt over xmas??Its not about that!!

4. Why dont you do what we do with our bros,sisters and say we wont buy each other gifts, you then dont get a load of stuff you dont want and you can save your money,seems a much better option,weve been doing it for years! Theyve got loads of kids 6 to buy for,weve got none, and ended up getting a gift each worth about £20 and them £200!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Moonbeam39

I had to take sharp intake of breath when reading this - I obviously don't get out much are there really people so brazen to make demands like this.

I would tell him where he could put his present list and to be honest if he didn't like it it would be no great loss, in fact i'm sure your life would be a lot better without him!

Can I ask is your BIL married to a sibling of yours or your husbands or is he a blood relative? (or should I say blood sucking)

dontone

What a cheek, and also what an idiot. How dare he!!!
What business is it of his to say those nasty things and how dare he demand money for himself, wife and children. He's full of Christmas spirit....not.
I wouldn't give him and his wife anything and I'd send something small for the 7 month old and a huge cardboard box for the 3 year old (lets be honest kids always play with the cardboard packing at Christmas instead of the toy)

And there is nothing wrong with Ebay or any other on line site so please take no notice. It's your money so it's nothing to do with him how you spend it.

deb68_2

He is hubby's brother my family nothin like him, thankfully nor is my lovley hubby,
Thank you all for your great suggestions,We have spoken about it today not going to give in to him, brother in law an sis in law get nowt will give the kids £5 each and a book that will be it, hubby will give them when they come down as bil wont give them to his kids.
once again thank you