KTjazz - the great life overhaul

KTjazz

I need to get away from this computer and get my application form finished. Or I'll miss my chance for good.

I need... dunno what I need. sleep probably.

I can't focus

and now I sound all melodramatic... !!!!!!.

[Deleted User]

Hi KT, I was going to reply straight away, but work got in the way!

I don't really know much about you and your OH, but it sounds like you both love and care for each other a lot, but you are both going through your own "stuff" at the moment.

Taking some apart will be difficult for you both I'm sure, but hopefully a bit of distance will help you both decide what's important and how best to move forward.

As for how best to keep in touch whilst giving each other space - how about you agree to "check in" (via a text? not very romantic I know but it doesn't put too much pressure on anyone), once a day (pick a time maybe), just to say "Hi", or one email each a day saying everything you need/want to say, which gives you time to think about your responses without things being said in the heat of the moment?

I don't know what to suggest, but I do know that life and relationships can be darn tricky (I've been with my hubby for 16 years) and it's not easy all of the time no matter how much you love each other, but if you're right for each other you will find a way to make things work and both be happy.

Thinking of you, treat yourself (in a completely MSE way of course :rotfl: ). x

KTjazz

goochie wrote: »

Hi KT, I was going to reply straight away, but work got in the way!

I don't really know much about you and your OH, but it sounds like you both love and care for each other a lot, but you are both going through your own "stuff" at the moment.

Taking some apart will be difficult for you both I'm sure, but hopefully a bit of distance will help you both decide what's important and how best to move forward.

As for how best to keep in touch whilst giving each other space - how about you agree to "check in" (via a text? not very romantic I know but it doesn't put too much pressure on anyone), once a day (pick a time maybe), just to say "Hi", or one email each a day saying everything you need/want to say, which gives you time to think about your responses without things being said in the heat of the moment?

I don't know what to suggest, but I do know that life and relationships can be darn tricky (I've been with my hubby for 16 years) and it's not easy all of the time no matter how much you love each other, but if you're right for each other you will find a way to make things work and both be happy.

Thinking of you, treat yourself (in a completely MSE way of course :rotfl: ). x

We have agreed to still text and stuff, I just want to text all the time! I know I won't hear from him again until Sunday when he lets me know he's back safe. It's hard. We've never lived in each others pockets and can go a few days without talking. But it's knowing that I won't, that's the hard part. We've gone longer than this without seeing each other, but still...

The right thing to do - rarely the easiest.

I take it a trip to my local ice-cream parlour in these circumstances is MSE, yeah?!

[Deleted User]

KTjazz wrote: »

I take it a trip to my local ice-cream parlour in these circumstances is MSE, yeah?!

Absolooooootely - go for it.

mum2one

U both sound a really strong couple, who for a lot of reasons have problems, I guess his acting is not full time and the resting period, may be giving him to much free time. Not sticking uo for him, but re drinking maybe because his mum drank it could be his self concious thinking its acceptable, but hearing from his mum that it isnt may just be the kick up the rear he needs.

Ok hes away for the weekend, but he texted to say hes there, a really gd sign, he'll text to say hes back, again brillaint, I know haveing the space part is hard when u are apart, but you have both agreed a tine to come back and talk, maybe that will do you both the world of good, set yourself a ah I will ring or text or email at certain points, try off his lead,I dont know what he is like for communicating?
U 2 sound perfect together, I dontknow what u think but have you consider relationship councelling with relate, you dont have to be a married couple to go, it may be worth thinking about for the future.

Hope u enjoyed the icecream, were taking dd out to an icecream farm next week, shes not allowed out to afte Monday, she won't be contagious after that, bless her shes got german measles. xx

Pippilongstocking

Kt just wanted to say hugs and kisses and stuff.

Hope the time apart will help for you both.xxx

Gives a PM if you get a bit glumsome - whilst I am no help at all - I can probably say something stupid.

xx

MrsAudus2b

Oh Kt :grouphug:

I have written and re-written this reply a couple of times now...trying to give advice but realising that you are strong enough not to hear my mutterings. I really admire your strength that comes through your posts - and agree that the right things are never the easier. I am awful when it comes to communicating when I shouldn't...me and OH have known each other for 9 years and the early years were very bumpy.

You have got so much going on in your life, you keep yourself busy and are so interesting. Is there anything you could do about seeing your friends more when you are having this breathing space?

Sending you lots of love
xxxxx

andan

Hi KT, sorry to hear you have so much going on at the moment. It does sound like the break will do you both some good as it sounds like you both have a lot to cope with right not and sometimes we have to take care of ourselves before taking care of others.

It must have taken a lot of guts to make the suggestion and the strength to act on it and you obviously value your relationship a great deal to be doing that.

Sending you positive healing thoughts.

KTjazz

I got a text message from OH this morning wishing me a happy valentines day and telling me he loves me loads. I sent one back.

I'd forgotten it was valentines day. We've never really gone in for all that. He was usually doing a show so even though this is our 4th valentines day, we've never spent one together.

job app nearly finished. I just need to fill the box of doom in my best hand writing and I can post it I think. I've written what is going in the box, I'll re read it first and then transfer it over.

I'm sad today. I just want to drink and eat chocolate and ice cream...

Piquant_2

KT, I'm sorry I disappeared, I'm here now with nothing but hugs and love for you. I hope and pray that everything goes right for you both and you come out of this with a stronger and even more resilient love.

PM me if you need me.

Piq x