KTjazz - the great life overhaul

KTjazz

red head-scarf, very little house on the prairie...

Piquant_2

KTjazz wrote: »

red head-scarf, very little house on the prairie...

Oh how I loved that series, it was my favourite! I carried a candle for Pa for years

Pippilongstocking

OK KT - do you want a stamp??


Glad the cleaning is going OK.

Shame about poor Boris - all legs intact. etc??

Need the info for my inventory.

For the freezer you know.

The way times are and given my writing skills.........we may need to stock up.

KTjazz

fayjmck wrote: »

OK KT - do you want a stamp??


Glad the cleaning is going OK.

Shame about poor Boris - all legs intact. etc??

Need the info for my inventory.

For the freezer you know.

The way times are and given my writing skills.........we may need to stock up.

Boris AKA Dafty appeared to be one leg short of regular before his adventure in the sink (thinking about it, perhaps that's why he lost his footing...) he was one of those tiny bodied, HUGE leg kind of spiders. I wasn't his biggest fan to be honest, he didn't pay his own way...

Pippilongstocking

Oh well Boris was a long legged show off spider (don't mind having wee legs)

Love the word dafty - OH uses it the whole time (he's a fifer)

Glad the cupboard is now free of spiders and stuff.

KTjazz

Well i hope it's free from spiders, spider funerals don't sit well with the soul.

If there are any more the poor window fitty men can find them tomorrow and deal with them I hope! I'll be in the library doing my homework. Hopefully there aren't any spiders there..

I have to ask Fay, do you have one of the lilty Orkadian accents? and use weird Orkadian words that nobody else understands?

KTjazz

I'm in a very strange mood. I have a lot to do before the end of the day but had a really rubbish night last night. (to put it mildly)

I need to get my (now overdue) homework done. I need to finish my application and get it in the post either today or first thing tomorrow (closing date monday)

I can't concentrate though.

last night was rough.

I don't know how much of it I want to go into 'cause if I start I won't stop.

I'll come back later.

[Deleted User]

Hi KT - long time lurker here. Sorry to hear you are having a rough time. x

KTjazz

goochie wrote: »

Hi KT - long time lurker here. Sorry to hear you are having a rough time. x

Hello and a warm welcome,

No need to lurk, come and join in the chaos!

As for me, I'll be fine, I always am. It's hard to explain everything but I'm worried, scared, sad and more all at once.

I will try to explain later, promise.

KTjazz

Ok, here it is...

I had a proper heart to heart with OH last night. I haven't cried so much in a very long time. There has been a distance between us for a couple of months now (more actually). It has been caused by a few things, I've not been happy because I am lonely. I never get invited out and rarely see my friends. But I have been lonely most of my life so that isn't the root cause.

OH has been showing signs of depression for months. He has been so unhappy. There are loads of reasons, he is always down when he's not acting for example. He's also been drinking more and more and it is worrying him, me and others around him. It took his recovering alcohlic mother telling him for it to sink in though.

He feels he never treats me as well as I deserve and shutting me out from everything has been part of that. He's not perfect, he has his moments, but he's a good man really.

He has said lately that a number of things need to change in his life but of all the things in his life I'd be the last thing he'd want to change. I believe him.

But here is the toughest part. He needs to sort his head out with no outside pressure from anyone (including me) so we are taking a bit of time apart to give us both the space we need. It was my suggestion and hurt my heart to say it and go through with it. But inspite of everything it feels like the right thing to do. We have agreed that it's not forever, we'll take it to the end of the month and reassess. We're going to do valentines day then, go out, spend time together and properly talk about everything again.

It feels like a weight has been lifted from us. We both said it. We know what's been wrong and are taking steps to feel better. He feels better already just telling me what has been going on with him.

He is away this weekend for his dad's birthday (you might remember that the organisation of that trip...). I have heard from him to let me know he arrived safely.

How do I find the balance of wanting to see how he's doing, and missing him with giving us both the space and time we need??

Sorry for the ramble. I just needed to get that all out.