Miss Optimistic's Diary to stay focused & stay organised!

saterkey

Just read all your diary, usually starting reading diaries and give up half way, but yours kept me going all the way through.....

Lovely to have an update from you how you are now from when you started.

Seems like you are level pegging with your jobs again, you just need that optimistic push again to start afresh with your debts and sling everything you can at them.

Good luck hope everything works out well for you....

Julie

MissOptimistic

Thanks Saterkey that is a lovely thing to say and I think you are right, I need that push to get going again rather than just getting used to being able to pay the bills.
I have half filled a charity bag this evening and spotted a few things around the house I can Ebay, so need to find the motivation to get on with it (a bit harder at the moment as I have a cold )

MissOptimistic

Just read back though my own diary and have really surprised myself. I can't believe how focused and optimistic I can be at times. I feel that this has all gone a bit out of the window of late, and I have been concentrating on muddling from one week to the next. I have stopped exercising all together and hardly do any of the things I enjoy anymore as I am just too shattered.
I think this is all because OH now works 3pm-midnight, so when I get home from work, I am effectively a single mother, I am already tired from work (full time) and am then having to do all the childcare, housework, disciplining etc. Sometimes I even have to go out at midnight and pick OH up from work if its raining (can't expect him to walk 3 miles in the dark and rain) - so I am shattered in the morning when it all starts again with getting the kids off to school.
This has all come to a head this week, with me getting the cold and falling to bits - After some sould searching, we can't help the work situation but I am going to make an effort to look after myself a bit more.
I will do this by:-

• Doing something I enjoy - crafting - I have just ordered two balls of wool and I am going to do some crochet which I enjoy
• Going to try and find the energy to start running again, maybe only once a week at first but it will be a start
• Going to try and watch what I eat, have had a bad habit of snacking on rubbish since OH has been working lates and is not around
• Going to try not to stress, worry or procrastinate

I will let you know how I get on

MissOptimistic

Well, sent the kids of to school in their p.j's this morning (intentionally - for Children in need!) - although that should have been easy - when I considered the thought of other people seeing what my kids wear to bed these days, (bottoms at half mast, you get the picture) I had to go out and buy them all a nice pair of 'presentable' pjamas!
Annoying since I know that they are all getting new p.j.'s for Christmas!

Am currently waiting for the postie to bring me some nice parcels
1. 2 balls of wool so I have something to do in the evenings while OH is at work
2. A pair of Ugg Boots from the 'grabbit' thread (I know, I know, not very MSE but I did get them for £60 instead of £120 - just hope they fit!
3. Some books ordered from Book People (through Quidco) for DS2's Christmas

Feel like there is loads to do - Our study is ready to be decorated but between everything else, can't find the energy to get going with it, I have all the stuff here to do it and I know it will look stuning when done, so really should get cracking!

Have a nice day if you're reading this

MissOptimistic

Well, some stuff arrived from NEXT today - that is the debt I am targetting though, so I know it sounds bad, but OH wanted some jeans and he is rubbish at shopping - he can never be bothered to try stuff on and gets all stressed and ends up coming home empty handed. Anyway he is keeping 2 pairs of jeans that come to £75, so I will do a bank transfer straight to the NExt account to keep it at the same level. A coat also came for me which I love (only £45) and I haven't had a new coat for a couple of years, so I will pay for that with some christmas money that MIL is giving me this weekend.
Not got much planned later - it will be good to have OH at home tonight and I will have a nice glass of wine and plan for the future - feeling really happy and positive today :j
Picked DD up from school and her brand new Pj's were covered in mud and her coat was all dirty - she didn't seem herself and said someone had pushed her over, but she wouldn't spill any more beans.
My Uggs arrived and I love them - think I will wear them in bed tonight :rotfl:

MissOptimistic

Was I really feeling happy & positive yesterday?
OH has woken up in a bad mood, ended up that he had a massive row with DS and has told him he cant go to the footie match this afternoon, and we are hardly talking - DS is sulking in his room and other DS and DD and playing together and trying to igore the atmosphere
Oh the joys of family life!
Well it may be a good thing that OH is out of the house this afternoon and maybe I can get back on track.
My wool arrived this morning so can have a look at my pattern and see if I can get started on it, although its been a while since I did any crochet.
Managed to get another Christmas present sorted yesterday, some golf shoes for FIL. Its a bit more than we would usually spend, but he is always paying for stuff for us and collects the kids from school 2 or 3 days a week which is a 20+ mile round journey from him and he never accepts any petrol money for it, so its a special treat
Have a nice day if you're reading this

MissOptimistic

Think this week is going from bad to worse. OH in an even grumpier mood this morning, banging round the house, rowing with us all for no need at all. I don't know if we can recover from this? - Things have been bad for the past year, due to lack of money mainly and OH just being generally unhappy (I think he may be depressed). I have had my doubts for a while now, but I just can't face up to it, that maybe I would be better off alone? So I have just kept plodding on, papering over the cracks after every row and keeping my head down as much as possible.

I have to look at the positive things in life I suppose, so:-

• Someone coming to pick something up Ive sold on Ebay today = £40 cash
• Going to get my wool out this afternoon and start my crocheting
• Going to wrap up some more christmas pressies this afternoon and try and feel in the festive spirit
• Looking forward to eating healthier next week, going to try and cut out carbs for 5 days and see if I can lose a couple of pounds
• All my kids love me and tell me regularly

macgirl

Hi MissO and welcome back!

Sorry to hear that things are tough for you and OH, but it's really hardly surprising given your working hours, debt and 3 kids! You then pin all your hopes on a happy weekend when you have free time together and it doesn't work out like that. I so understand and I'm sure there are many others out there that feel the same way.

Could you all go out for a walk somewhere? That often clears the air for us, just changing the environment makes all the difference and blows away the cobwebs....

Hope you can manage to have nice evening before it's time to get back on the hamster wheel again. Take care x

MissOptimistic

Hi MacGirl - Thanks, but a walk is a no-go - OH has now gone off to work again. We won't see each other properly now until Wednesday lunchtime and that will only be for 1.5 hours.
Gonna try and de-stress tonight, I may have a radox bath, do a bit of reading, crafting and try and focus on nice things!

MissOptimistic

Well had quite a productive evening, so far I have:-

• Emptied the ironing basket (and I mean 'emptied' even down to those last few things that are always lurking at the bottom and NEVER get ironed!)
• Been on my treadmil and run just over 3 miles at a fast pace - I am very pleased with this progress since I checked in my exercise diary and I haven't done any exercise since 30th Sept!

:eek:

So the rest of the night, I am going to plan our meals for the coming week, surf on here a bit, watch some TV, start my crochet (or at least study the pattern) and I may also pick a book to start reading.

Have a good evening if you're reading this