Does Being broke turn you into a grump

ltm07

You're right beckseven, we do have to cut back one way or another. To be honest I am quite content with my life. Everyone's different I guess, some want to clear their debts ASAP, whilst others want to pay them off at a steady rate, whilst still doing some of the things that they were doing before their LBM. We fall into the latter I guess. We did go through a stage where all we seemed to be doing was paying off debts & it really was all work & no play, but now we do have the odd night out, family meal out etc., but both know that we both have to do extra hours at work to do this. By the way, the Sun hols are fantastic, used to go on them all the time when DD was younger!

LilacPixie

Hi Icka,

Yup i'm a grumpy grumpy woman.

I am a bit strange tho, I even get grumpy about comments on my own SOA. It is all reletive but when you have managed to cut a serious chunk of a certain budget away and you are all proud of yourself for managing it and then someone comes along and tells you your spending far far too much and to lop another £100 minimum its a bit soul destroying.

redsquirrel80

whitewing wrote: »

I'm not in debt, but am being very frugal. So I do tend to convert 'things' into how much of my monthly grocery bill I would have spent.

Glad I'm not the only one - sometimes every tenner is thought of in terms of "that could feed me for a week!"

Oh and I've always been grumpy but it does make me more so, I'm sure I come across as really mean sometimes when I complain about money - because I think about it so much it has got a bit obsessive, and I know that I get really stressed about spending at times that must seem trivial to other people.

icka

Thanks everyone for your brilliant replies.

I was just having a bit of a !!!! week. i just started a new job and in the middle of mental training, havent been paid yet for 6 weeks. And bills are mounting and mounting. I am also putting myself through night college to try to do something with my life. The only reason i will be DF in 6 months is my debts were so bad and wasnt working. I had to do something drastic.

So I left the city, my friends, BF and moved 200 miles back in with my parents so I could throw everything at my debts. I was so lucky my parents allowed me to do that. But before that it was really really bleak. Now Im back trying to put my life back together.

I never ever want to be in thousands and thousands of pounds worth of debt again. I am only in a contract role and it could end at any stage so i need to be careful. i have learned to make do with what I have. Everyone on here has thought me about meal planning and how to make your wardrobe stretch.
To be honest Im not jealous all the time just some times i get the little sigh.................woe is me, I think Im in a Jane Austin novel :-)

But I am happy that I have rented a room in a random strangers house, I am earning my money to pay for food, rent and college, anything else is a luxury.

And I am ok with that. You think when you are young by 30 you will have it all sorted, married, kids, great job, fantastic hubby, lovely house in a great nightbourhood, size 10, yummy mummy. When reality is you are single ish, doing a crappy contract, broke, as far off being married and settled as you were when you were 10, you are now a lovely size 12 ish and I mean ish, you a renting a room in a house and you have zero savings and a whole world of debt.

Ah well on the bright side I still have my sense of humour, a great family and i am in 3rd year of college only have 1 year left after this one, and I have kick !!! friends

xxx

moneysavingmaia

i alternate i think, some days i am so proud of myself for keeping on top of things and managing to keep the roof over our heads and other days i hate the world for being in a position like this !! i agree with a lot of people on here that we have to be grateful for what we have, my kids are having a ball at the moment trashing the kitchen with their 99p make your own christmas card sets, before i would have been begging for a babysitter so i could go out, and watching my kids do this is so much more fun (although do wish i could afford a cleaner!!).

i have had a shoddy couple of years but my debts are going down, i have one 0% debt and my mortgage and after my divorce i did that ON MY OWN and am so proud of me !!

although a friend was telling me about her holiday of a lifetime that she and DH and DS were going on (this week) and her hubby pulled her to one side and told her to stop bragging in front of me - that pity was horrible, but they are good people and fortunate enough to have that kind of disposable income, she struggles to conceive and desperately wants another child - no-ones life is perfect and i know i would rather have my wonderful kiddies messing up my kitchen than owe thousands on another credit card !!

but in answer to your question - yeah it makes me a grump quite a lot of the time !!

Maia xx

poorandindenial

Hi icka

I don't thnk you are a horrible person at all and we can all be grumpy so that isn't anything to beat yourself up about. I also think this is a really interesting thread.

I haven't gone to read your post to Glen but this thread did make me have a ponder. I can completely see where you are coming from, but I can also see what he was getting at too - bear with me and I will try not to get too wooly and will try not to get a splinter in my bum from sitting on the fence.

What this thread reminded me is that we have a really wide variety of situations on here and we are all trying to cut back in our own ways. I guess to Glenn £200 IS cutting back (actually would have been for me too at first although I don't get bored of not going out, having very little disposable income allows me to say no to nights out that I don't really want to go to anyway and makes me value those where I do go all the more)

I get really jealous of people that can play with all their salary, but then I remind myself that I got myself into the situation I am in, and then I get jealous of me in the future, the one that won't have to count the pennies in the way that I do not. I have learned some valuable lessons on here and I hope that they will stay with me forever, but I would be lying if I said I was going to be as frugal post debt freedom as I am now.

I guess that what I am saying is that this board should be about everyone who is trying to get out of debt, some of us on here are high earners, some of us are low earners or on benefits - but we are (almost) ALL trying to get out of debt and I would hate people to feel that they can't share their situation and learn from the advice of others.

Anyhow, I just thought I would add my witterings and say again that I think this is a really interesting thread.

hula-hoops

It's all relative.

Me and my husband spent some time last year working as volunteers in an orphanage in Asia. The employees there were on one US dollar a day (well, the equivalent in local currency). £200 would feed the children there for quite a while.

It helped us re-evaluate life and we find pleasure in simple things - a walk in the country, a board game, etc. We got rid of our TV and suddenly we had so much to talk about we wondered how we coped with a TV!

I don't think it is anger you are feeling - more likely frustration.

I get frustrated when I see people who clearly have more money than us. But then I tell myself to put into perspective and look at all the good things I've got. I've got the best husband in the world, have some great friends, my health and some beautiful countryside near our house to walk around.

Life is good!

Bismarck

Am I am grump? oh yes....hopefully in a realistic "do we REALLY need that?" kind of way but I know I'd be a lot more chilled if I had plenty in the bank...but I have things in life that money really can't buy...so would I change for anyone else's life? No.

End of story.

PasturesNew

The richest among you are those sharing your life with somebody you love. You can't buy that.

LittleCharlie

Anything that makes you unhappy can make you grumpy. My partner has been very unwell this summer, and I found myself snapping at someone the other week and saying "At least you are healthy". Of course I didn't mean it, my point is we all do these things. Don't feel bad. I think you were spot on.