Ideas for ADHD Children?

srp69

Hi all
firstly thanks for this great thread as anyone who supports a kid with adhd knows a bit of recognition and understanding is a great stress reliever.
my son has just been given an official diagnoses of ADHD after 7 years of being 'a very naughty and disruptive little boy' (according to the ' pros' at one backward looking elitist school) and me being sat on the dole for over three years( i am a single farther and he lives with me) because that was the level of support required of me(as you know as far as family help goes with this sort of thing ignorance is bliss) to keep him at school regularly.
But I digress, the reason i am posting this is that since his diagnoses i have managed to get back to work as a taxi driver but is little more than part time ( the only job i could think of that i can fit around my son and support he needs)and have been told that i can claim DLA so have collected a form and started to fill it in, the problem i am having is that i feel rather cheeky applying for it and feel that i would probably not get anything for him due to the way the questions are phrased in the form (he has no other conditions and even though i have to almost force him to do the everyday things they ask about in the form he does eventually do them, with, or without, help),is there anywere i can go to get help in filling this form or anyone that can tell me how bad a problem ADHD has to be to be able to claim DLA?
ONE MORE THING- if there is anyone out there with a 'naughty child' and they think ASD may be the problem you have the right to ask for a referall to someone who can help, if the problem is at school it is NOT the schools option to refer or not, insist on it, that said it is a long and slow process so be prepared for a marathon, and good look.

shazrobo

FOXYLADY88 wrote: »

I am a single mum and have two ADHD & ODD children. I love them dearly but oh my how hard is it!! I have met very few people who agree that there is such a condition, including family. It is such a struggle to get through each day. School are no help, the Childrens Mental Health teams are even worse.........throw medication down their throats but offer no counselling or family support. Social Services dont want to know and I applied for DLA and was turned down flat. There seems to be no clear help for us at all.

I try to keep them mega busy with football and as many clubs and such as I can possibly afford, but its expensive. If anyone knows of offers/discounts that we can get because of it I would be grateful!!:j

Mine both have little respect for things so I too avoid libraries or borrowing etc, I am ashamed to say we hardly go out as a family because I am so anxious and embarrassed about their behaviour. Feel like a terrible mother but I am all they have.......their Dad is long gone. I recently managed to get off benefits and got a fab job in a school term time only, i love it, pay is rubbish but I get to be someone other than their mum for a few hrs a day:T ......it does help but I do struggle.
Who do I call when my son decides to lock me in the house and bang and kick all the doors and windows constantly for 30mins whilst swearing and shouting at me?? :eek: There is literally no one to help.:mad:

Is anyone else as frustrated as me??!!!!

xx

yes i am often as frustrated as you, i have twins aged 13, both have adhd, one also has Oppositional defiant disorder, the other has conduct disorder, there is just me and the boys at home, and i can relate to how you feel, i have often been attacked by one of my sons, and there has been nobody to help.
how old are your children by the way
shaz x

she_grinch

I haven't read the entire thread but my daughter used to go to drumming lessons and her tutor told me that drumming helps children and adults with ADHD as it channels all there frustration and helps with there concentration, it certainly calmed my daughter down, she used to be very hyper!http://www.smh.com.au/news/alternative-health/drum-up-support/2006/08/30/1156816964492.html
You may be able to get help or a grant for this?

Savvy_Sue

srp69 wrote: »

and have been told that i can claim DLA so have collected a form and started to fill it in, the problem i am having is that i feel rather cheeky applying for it and feel that i would probably not get anything for him due to the way the questions are phrased in the form (he has no other conditions and even though i have to almost force him to do the everyday things they ask about in the form he does eventually do them, with, or without, help),is there anywere i can go to get help in filling this form or anyone that can tell me how bad a problem ADHD has to be to be able to claim DLA?

Worth a look on the Benefits board, but I think Welfare Rights are usually recommended, or CAB if you don't have a local WR branch. It definitely is worth getting help with it, because they will know how to answer the questions the 'right' way: you have to focus on what your son can't do that most children of his age would be able to do, and TBH that's not the way we usually look at things, is it?

karendb

srp69 wrote: »

Hi all
firstly thanks for this great thread as anyone who supports a kid with adhd knows a bit of recognition and understanding is a great stress reliever.
my son has just been given an official diagnoses of ADHD after 7 years of being 'a very naughty and disruptive little boy' (according to the ' pros' at one backward looking elitist school) and me being sat on the dole for over three years( i am a single farther and he lives with me) because that was the level of support required of me(as you know as far as family help goes with this sort of thing ignorance is bliss) to keep him at school regularly.
But I digress, the reason i am posting this is that since his diagnoses i have managed to get back to work as a taxi driver but is little more than part time ( the only job i could think of that i can fit around my son and support he needs)and have been told that i can claim DLA so have collected a form and started to fill it in, the problem i am having is that i feel rather cheeky applying for it and feel that i would probably not get anything for him due to the way the questions are phrased in the form (he has no other conditions and even though i have to almost force him to do the everyday things they ask about in the form he does eventually do them, with, or without, help),is there anywere i can go to get help in filling this form or anyone that can tell me how bad a problem ADHD has to be to be able to claim DLA?
ONE MORE THING- if there is anyone out there with a 'naughty child' and they think ASD may be the problem you have the right to ask for a referall to someone who can help, if the problem is at school it is NOT the schools option to refer or not, insist on it, that said it is a long and slow process so be prepared for a marathon, and good look.

Firstly, don't feel "cheeky" - imagine how much you are saving the state by looking after your son yourself - it would cost them far more to pay someone else.

Secondly, when it comes to filling out the DLA form, think about how your son is on his very worst days and fill out the form accordingly. It's not easy this as you don't want to be negative about your children. However, the person reading it and making the decision may not have much knowledge about ADHD - you have to spell it out for them.

And, FYI, I know several people who get the middle rate for their ADHD children and, therefore, are entitled to Carer's Allowance as well.

If you are turned down the first time for DLA or you are only offered the lower rate, appeal!

Thirdly, please do explore ALL the other benefits and help you may be entitled to.

Best wishes,

GlasweJen

You shouldn't just fill in the worst days, the information on the form must be an acurate portrayal of your sons needs and how often he needs help and how much more help he needs than the average child of his age. It helps to enclose a diary if his condition fluctuates.

blue_monkey_2

Dear srp69,

You can find a guide here on how to fill out the DLA forms. You get 6 weeks to do it but the money is backdated from the time you apply.

They are very intentensive and very draining to do so please be aware of this, check and double check the forms to ensure that you have included all you need to. If you son needs more help than another child of his age then you will qualify. My form took around 10 hours to fill in which I did over a few weeks - photocopy every page incase it gets lost in the post. It took 3 months to get a descision while they contacted school and doctors but they do keep you informed.

You can find a downloadable guide here and it will help you stage by stage on filling the form in: http://www.cerebra.org.uk/parent_support/DLA_guide.htm

cathy1969

Hi, My son is 13 this year and was diagnosed with ADHD just as he started secondary school. His Senco has been brilliant but with limited money and people help in lessons has been few & far between.

His primary school thought he was dyslexic but he isnt however they found out he has auditory & visual sequential memory problems. He has a passport which he shows teachers so they know he has problems. They only have to put a ta in english maths & science but he struggles in others too. He wont ask for help from the teachers so if he doenst understand he wont do much in that lesson. He thinks he is stupid & really has low self esteem & not much confidence.

At his last appointment with ADHD doctor she advised he be seen by a school phycologist which I have asked for but dont like to keep asking as I know how busy they are.

I have seen on other threds people mentioned cognative tests, what are they and where are they done?

I really want to help him get the best out of his education but feel im always running into a brick wall, can anyone offer any advice. Im sure school just think im a nurotic mother and humour me.

blue_monkey_2

Also check out your county council website, we have Hertfordshire Additional Needs Database and they issue us with a card so we can get discounts into places to keep the children entertained, also details of places nationwide who offer discounts to children with disabilities - we just have to show the card.

cathy1969

He wont ask for help as he is scared of the response he will get not only from other kids but from teachers too