I need help.

JET34

Ohh don't really have much to add to what everyone else has said.. I don't know what has been going on in your world but perhaps you need some time apart to realize just what you do want..... and if you do split up it's not the end of the world just the start of a new one....... see no sympathy from me!! anyway big hugs to you all I am sure you'll be fine

daphne_descends

Oh Sar :grouphug: lots of replies to help with the practical side of things so I just want to say how sorry I am to hear this. Are you really sure that things can't be worked on? Someone mentioned Relate - I think they wil ask for a donation if you can't afford the full whack and it might be just what you need to have someone completely impartial listen to you both.

Your friends are here for anything you need :grouphug:

SuzySu

I'm so sorry to hear your news IA.....you have been a lot of support to people on here and I'm sure that they will all support you now. If there's anything I can do, please let me know.

PS. Don't know what Freecycle "issues" you have had, but my OH furnished her whole house recently on Freecycle......it can be done.

immoral_angeluk

Thank you for all the messages. Without going into the reasons behind the split we've both decided that this is for the best and will better for the girls in the long run, although it's hard now.
Have been trying to get my head around everything but here's the practicalities side of it as it stands.
Ste's going to move in with his mum and have the girls every weekend as he wouldn't be eligibile for a HA property.
I'll need to give up my part time jobs (paid) and claim income support, tax credits and housing/council tax benefit. Until these have gone through we're keeping the finances as they are with Ste paying the bills.
So I can carry on my CAB ste is going to pay for nursery, and let me have the car on the days I need it, by way of maintenance. But not sure how this would effect the CSA part of income support.

um.. what else. Uh.. god can't think.

Ste will move out once he's set up at his mums... but it's just affording the stuff he needs.

jinky67

Sar when me and EX split we both told the CSA we would sort it between ourselves..they just told us how much it should be,but it was up to us to arrange payments etc.
Dont know if it has changed since though...this was 12 years ago.

could you not get extra hours at work to take you to 16,if the girls will be away at the weekend?

GirlRacer_2

Hi IA so sorry to hear your news. Your such a popular person on here can't you list what you need and we'll all see what we've got spare to donate to you and Ste. I know it's not ideal but I'm sure there are lots of people on here that are willing to help.

Big Hugs to you xxx

immoral_angeluk

I would hate anyone to think we were begging or looking for charity though. I'm sure we'll sort something. It's the usual stuff like a single bed, cots and stuff.

TotallyBroke

Why do you need to give up the part time work?
If it is under so many hours you will still get help with council tax. While working you will get wtc which also has the childcare element to help pay for childcare. Although this all takes time to come through.

immoral_angeluk

TotallyBroke wrote: »

Why do you need to give up the part time work?
If it is under so many hours you will still get help with council tax. While working you will get wtc which also has the childcare element to help pay for childcare. Although this all takes time to come through.

I did an entitled to calculation which said if I didn't work I'd get 60.50 a week. If I did work I'd get £4. My work wages are only £29 a week.

TotallyBroke

Wow... I didn't realise I thought the whole point of the wtc was to encourage people to work as they got more money through this than staying at home.