The ultimate incentive to get debt free, can I do it by New Years?

Cinny91

Men have such a way with words. You're right though, you should enjoy time with NIM for now, rather than thinking what could be around the corner. You should be spending your time going out for meals and doing quirky romantic things then worrying about marriage!

I don't see why you couldn't read on the cross trainer, although it might be a pain to turn the pages. Have you thought of going to your library and getting an audio book? Put it on your computer then onto your ipod or mp3 and you're sorted!

I suppose it would be just like sharing a house really! There are some pictures of the rooms on their website, looks amazing!

Dinah93

Last time I went to the library the audio books were on tape, have they progressed since then because I don't own a tape deck!

That's exactly it, I was happy exactly as things are 2 weeks ago, then he started mentioning taking it further, so I worked myself round to not only being okay with it, but looking forward to it, and now I feel stupid. Who needs that kind of hassle?!

Tete_en_l'Air

I thought you were really keen on the idea of marriage Dinah, and the sooner the better?

Hmm, when you say gluten-free - that would include pasta wouldn't it? And things like pizza dough? I couldn't live without my pasta!!!

I think reading on a cross trainer would make me ill I have to say!

Dinah93

I was keen, just terrified, I was trying to work past the fear. Now I want to accept it, the only reason I wanted to get married was to have kids, so both parents have equal rights, and the child has the extra bit of stability, and NIM apparently isn't working to a vauguely similar timescale that would enable me to have them. So if no kids, I see no point in getting married.

Hmmm hadn't considered the rocking motion = sickness!

Cinny91

There's no harm in looking forward to it but there's no point in putting un-needed pressure on yourself just because you think you should like the idea of getting married.
I personally don't think marriage is the ulitimate show commitment, it goes against my more romantic ideals but sharing finances, like you two going to buy a house together, shows you're in it for the long run more than anything.

Birdie85

Jeez, I go away from my desk for an hour and I've missed all sorts!

I don't know what to say to you re: marriage Dinah. At least you've put a stop to the talk for now so you can just enjoy being boyfriend and girlfriend without the pressure. Does NIM realise that he's going to have to compromise when it comes to kids; having them earlier than he's planning on? Every guy I know seems to have this silly part of their brain that says 'one day' for kids but whenever it gets close to their 'one day' age they push it back because they're scared! My OH does that but I know that if I had to have babies tomorrow or never because of my health he'd want them tomorrow!

Audio Books: you can get them on CD or download them in MP3 formats nowadays. OH downloads them and listens to them on his phone when he's at work.

Giving up bread: I went on a low-carb diet last year. I lost a stone and felt brilliant! It is quite awkward for going out, you don't realise how much restaurants pad out meals with bread, chips, pasta etc until you can't eat it! I plan on going back on it once we're settled in the flat as my pizza/pasta belly has returned and I have nowhere near the energy levels I had when I was low-carbing. I'd recommend it to anyone as you still eat really well but you don't get all bloated once you've finished eating, that's the first thing I noticed when I'd cheat and have rice or pasta, I looked about 4 months pregnant after my meal!

My solicitor has phoned and said that we should be completing today if the money comes through this morning! Whoop! If it doesn't come through till this afternoon (they have a 2.30 cut off) then we'll complete tomorrow so looks like whatever happens I'm moving tomorrow! Yippee!

Cinny91

So happy for you Birdie!! Must be great for the ball to be finally rolling again. Will you be waiting until the weekend to move in or will you get straight to it? Must be great to finally unbox everything!


As for low carb - I don't think I could do that! I'm too inlove with Hovis toastie I'm afraid. I think I might seriously give it a whirl on giving up all junk food for lent. Be a shock for my grandma when I ask for water instead of coke when I go around! Oh noo, and it's easter so she'll be making chocolate cake.. what to do what to do..

Dinah93

NIM knows that I need kids in the next 5 years max, or not at all, and if he's ignoring that or thinks it can be stretched a bit he's kidding himself. My thoughts were that he knew this, and my head had marriage/house in summer 2011, when he's graduated, then start trying for a kid if we decide we want one about 2 years later. This would give us some time to be a newly married couple, not as much as I would like, but some. It's sooner than I would have really liked it all, but in all honesty my blood pressure is already sky high even on medication and I'm actually being very generous with my timescales of when things are safe. But, that was the old plan. New plan is a lot less fairy tale and more realistic. Sod the marriage, and it's unlikely he'll be ready in time for kids. However I'm still going to have a cracking house, todays object of affection: http://www.rightmove.co.uk/property-for-sale/property-17753353.html?locationIdentifier=REGION%5E18351&sortByPriceDescending=false&radius=1.0&pageNumber=3&backToListURL=%2Fproperty-for-sale%2Ffind.html%3FlocationIdentifier%3DREGION%255E18351%26sortByPriceDescending%3Dfalse%26radius%3D1.0%26index%3D20&onetime_savedPropertyId=17753353#summary17753353. Right now though I don't want to think of any of that and I am fighting the urge to run for the hills!

Tete_en_l'Air

Ooh that house is nice! Needs a bit of redecorating mind! Are we going to have a house of the day now as well as a dress? I've been looking at this one: http://www.rightmove.co.uk/property-for-sale/property-19641656.html?locationIdentifier=REGION%5E601&minPrice=100000&displayPropertyType=houses&oldDisplayPropertyType=houses&pageNumber=1&backToListURL=%2Fproperty-for-sale%2Ffind.html%3FsearchType%3DSALE%26locationIdentifier%3DREGION%255E601%26radius%3D0.0%26displayPropertyType%3Dhouses%26minBedrooms%3D%26maxBedrooms%3D%26minPrice%3D100000%26maxPrice%3D%26maxDaysSinceAdded%3D%26_includeSSTC%3Don%26sortByPriceDescending%3D%26primaryDisplayPropertyType%3D%26secondaryDisplayPropertyType%3D%26oldDisplayPropertyType%3D%26oldPrimaryDisplayPropertyType%3D%26oldSecondaryDisplayPropertyType%3D%26newHome%3D%26retirement%3D%26auction%3Dfalse%26partBuyPartRent%3Dfalse%26x%3D91%26y%3D13 - I particularly like the turret and the bath with feet

Birdie, I'm so pleased for you!! Happy moving!

Dinah93

That ones a bit out of my budget I'm afraid Tete! I'm only looking at things in the possible right area/price range! We're wanting a do-er upper, long term project sort of place. Would hate to get a 'finished' house, really looking forward to doing up my own place.