MSE Parent Club - Part 2

My_Fathers_Daughter

Good Morning Lay-dees!!

Well our first night of bedtime routine was fab :T

Boobie feed at 6pm, followed by cuddles with mummy. 15 minutes playgym to let mummy and daddy eat their dinner

Bath at 7pm with extra splashing time rather than just a functional dip, followed by a clean nappy and some kicking about time on his rug where we were rewarded with Benjamins first front-to-back roll :T:T

A bit of a massage then sleepsuit on and a bottle and cuddles with dad where we were rewarded with a massive poop (down the legs and up the back!!)

New sleepsuit and vest, more cuddles with dad and mum and then into hi hammock awake at 8.10pm. A bit of bouncing, shushing and 'good-boy'ing and he was asleep by 8.14pm. Stirred twice for more bouncing and shushing but was fast asleep.

I woke him at 11.15pm to change his nappy and feed him, into his sleeping bag and in his carrycot upstairs. Benjamin slept til 5.30am then again til 9am


I feel like a new woman and hubby really enjoyed it...I think that was in part because I had written it all down and discussed it with him so he knew what the plan was! Anyone else guilty of thinking your OH knows what is going on in your head??

r.mac_2

My_Fathers_Daughter wrote: »

Good Morning Lay-dees!!

Well our first night of bedtime routine was fab :T

Boobie feed at 6pm, followed by cuddles with mummy. 15 minutes playgym to let mummy and daddy eat their dinner

Bath at 7pm with extra splashing time rather than just a functional dip, followed by a clean nappy and some kicking about time on his rug where we were rewarded with Benjamins first front-to-back roll :T:T

A bit of a massage then sleepsuit on and a bottle and cuddles with dad where we were rewarded with a massive poop (down the legs and up the back!!)

New sleepsuit and vest, more cuddles with dad and mum and then into hi hammock awake at 8.10pm. A bit of bouncing, shushing and 'good-boy'ing and he was asleep by 8.14pm. Stirred twice for more bouncing and shushing but was fast asleep.

I woke him at 11.15pm to change his nappy and feed him, into his sleeping bag and in his carrycot upstairs. Benjamin slept til 5.30am then again til 9am


I feel like a new woman and hubby really enjoyed it...I think that was in part because I had written it all down and discussed it with him so he knew what the plan was! Anyone else guilty of thinking your OH knows what is going on in your head??

totally - so than I get really annoyed when he does the 'wrong thing'!!!:rotfl: usually resulting in a very alert awake little girl to deal with!:rolleyes:

Well done btw

My_Fathers_Daughter

LOL mcsmiler - if you are anything like me then your poor hubby probably does the wrong thing (or the right thing the wrong way :rolleyes:) quite often. My hubby always says there is the MFD way and the wrong way :D


I noticed on your FB that you were feeding with a bottle yourself...does LO take a bottle from you okay? I haven't tried with Benjamin, just left his dad to it

r.mac_2

she's really good with bottles MFD - will take them from pretty much anyone! but we did start off with daddy giving them for the first few weeks. To begin with we also held her differently to help her distinguish between breat and bottle - we held her with our hand under her head over our knees and her feet at our tummy, if that makes any sense!

On the subject of feeding I ended up having a huge rant at hubby last night. He asked me a simple questions about the reasons why HV's push breast feeding and I managed to explode! The way he phrased things made it feel like he was criticising the fact that I am having to do formula top up feeds. And I was mad that he obviously hadn't listened to me when talking through these things in past weeks......Well he wasn't critisising, but being interested but not very sensitive in his approach! I hadn't realised that I am still so upset and sensitive on the issue. The worst part of it is that I am a logical and rational person and don't judge others if they bottle feed and know it's for the good of my LO's health but I feel so bad that I can't provide enough for her myself.

I really have tried and things are make worse over the last few days by not having the supply there to express. She had an 'extra' bottle feed of 3oz yesterday because she was so hungry.

All my HV says is to cut down on the ff and up the bf, but I have tried and it doesn't work - I spend days with LO constantly at the breast and screaming because she is hungry, yet my milk never increases. All accompanied by dissaproving tuts and looks from HV.

The thing I find hardest is that it was the medical profession which helped me end up in this situation in the first place. I had an emergency c-section, which I know know can inhibit your milk from coming in as quickly as a natural birth (but no-one told me) and then stuffed me with as many milk inhibiting pain killers as possible - the advice being to take them before the pain comes and as many as you are able to take, whereas I probably didn't need half of them and if I had been told about the milk inhibition properties I would have at least tried to cut them down sooner. Coupled with that I lost a lot of bood and have ridiculously low iron levels - I was discharged from hospital with an iron count of 78! The midwife who checked my iron levels 2 weeks after I went home said that I would only be contacted if there was a problem - no one contacted me, I had finished my iron tablets and so I thought everything was fine. However on being retested by my GP a couple of weeks ago as I was complaining of chronic tiredness it turns out my reading had only gone up to 80 and it hadn't increased any in the 8 weeks after that! LO lost a lot of her birth weight veyr quickly and so the midwife put us on formula topups. Everytime I asked about cutting them out before we became 'dependent' (i.e. we were at 2oz or so for 3 feeds a day) I was fobbed off with 'she needs it', but now I have a HV giving me guilt trips about ff anywhere between 4-6oz for 3-4 feeds a day (we are on about 6 feeds a day at the moment). And she seems to be getting hungrier. but she can't give me any new ideas to icnrease my milk supply.

I am now on numerous supplements designed for breastfeeding mothers and huge volumes of iron - expressing when I can (but not much there) and putitng baby to the breast. I feel that baby/I have suffered from missing out on those first few weeks of suckling for long periods because of the initial ff top ups baby didn't feel the need to suck.

sorry - that's turned into a huge rant, probably doesn't even make sense and is rather more detailed than anyone needed to know - and now I'm in tears and baby is screaming because she is hungry again and I know I haven't any milk for her - so another ff here I come

Sami_Bee

emlou - I'm looking forward to the OH's return update
My OH would come back with everything tesco value, an xbox game, some clothes and 2 crates of beer :rotfl:
If I can't do the shop in the flesh it gets delivered - lesson learnt there! :cool:

MFD - My hubby never does anything the 'right' way and refuses to listen to my instructions :rolleyes:

Sami_Bee

r.mac - Have you tried the natural 'milk makers'? I think oats are one you'll prob find the info on la leche/kellymom/etc
I know there is a tea you can get which is a rip off but you could look at the ingredients and get some else where?
here's what is in the tea I've seen

100% Organic Ingredients: Fenugreek Seed, Fennel Seed, Red Raspberry Leaf, Orange Peel, Nettle Leaf, Spearmint Leaf, Anise Seed, Caraway Seed, Alfalfa Leaf.

I can understand how ur feeling and I really hope you get through it xxx

Millie's_Mum

RMac, i don't actually have any constructive advice (you've probably heard it all anyway and Krystal is the guru) but, you sound just like me when I had millie, I had an emergency section too and all the drugs and the hospital gave millie formula before I had even tried to feed her myself, my milk actually never came in at all because she never spent any time at the breast.

I just wanted to say that I have been exactly where you are (although millie was much younger I only kept going with the breast/express/top ups for a couple of weeks) and I know exactly how you feel but you are doing the best you can and you shouldn't feel guilty for any decisions you have to make, I did and I made myself depressed about it instead of enjoying my new baby.

Believe me it goes so quickly, you need to do whatever will allow you to enjoy your baby, they are not little for long (millie is five and a half and it seems like 5 minutes not 5 years). You have done so well to keep going for this long, well done you!

I've read a few articles about getting breastfeeding going/ starting again after formula feeding and they all recommend the same thing, time at the breast, have you tried a babymoon? where you just go to bed you and baby for a whole day and let her feed/suckle for as long as she wants

feelinggood_2

r.mac wrote: »

sorry - that's turned into a huge rant, probably doesn't even make sense and is rather more detailed than anyone needed to know - and now I'm in tears and baby is screaming because she is hungry again and I know I haven't any milk for her - so another ff here I come

I'm sorry you are finding things diffocult. It is hard to think with our sensible heads and not our emotional heads isn't it? Keep trying to think about yourself how you'd think about someone else. You are doing a great job. I actually find I can express more when I sit there saying "I'm a good Mummy" and "I have a happy baby". Maybe you can try to tell yourself similar things? They are true after all!

Also, my hospital will sit down and go overyour birthing experience with you. Would you feel better talking it through? Maybe get some answers to why they did some things and why they didn't do others?

r.mac_2

Thanks guys. Sorry for the long rant - although it has made me feel a little bit lighter about it all! Millie's mum, I know you are right and I thought I had got over my feelings about it all - I think with her being noticibly hungrier this week has emphasised it all again.

I have tried the babymooning but to no avail. Got a quiet weekend planned so will make sure she feeds from me as much as absolutely possible. I will look for the tea (don't care how much it costs sami - not very mse I know!) I am taking pregnacare breast feeding vits and omega-3 oils etc and iron tablets by the bucketload

I just keep telling myself that anything I can give her is good so I don't want to cut it out completely if at all posisble - plus she finds it comforting to suck even if they are pretty empty and don't want to take that away from her.

This mother malarky is draining sometimes isn't it!!! thanks for the support - I did need that virtual hug x

Lu_T

Rmac - go easy on yourself hon. I'm sure Krystal will have some advice or you could call the number in her sig for someone to sound off to. You're doing everything you can to help your LO and are a fab mummy, but sometimes we just need to cut ourselves some slack.

Feelie - hope you're doing okay?

MFD - hurrah for bedtime routines :T long may you continue feeling like a different woman. And what do you mean your OH isn't psychic? That was one of my criteria in a husband :rotfl:

!Gloat alert! I'm child-free and thoroughly enjoying it :T A bit annoyed I couldn't get back to sleep this am after DH went to work, but I don't feel too tired. I was up at 8, pottered around, got dressed and had brekkie by 9am then went into the nearby town to do a few jobs.

I've negotiated a discount on the new baby car seat so I'll go to get that this pm then come home for a nap and paint DD's furniture. Oh, and I've managed to watch some crappy daytime TV :T

DH has just called and offered to buy me a new phone. Mine's a bit knackered and contract isn't up until October. A mate at work has a PAYG one for £30 which actually looks pretty good, so I'm well pleased. The camera on my phone doesn't work and I want to be able to take pix of the new baby.

Right, off to make myself some lunch then drive to York to get the car seat. I do love Imogen, but days like this are just fab!!