Signing up for a loan on behalf of girlfriend who wants a boob job

tsstss7

I think maybe you should consider a compromise and offer to pay for the boob job after you "as a family" have saved up the cash needed rather than opt for expensive finance solutions, as a bonus this might act as an incentive for your OH to help you keep household costs down so all in all a win win situation.

As the mother of your children (and new baby) your OH isn't exactly in the position to go out and get a well paying job so she can afford her own boob job so maybe this would be a good solution for her. It'll also serve to delay the operation long enough for her to fully consider if this is what she really wants - if at the end of 18mths or more she still feels strongly then maybe it will help her to feel more normal.

FWIW pregnancy completely changed my body and it's only because I have a reaL fear of operations that I wouldn't consider this - I'd love my old (or even a semblance of my old) body back.

Cerisa

MargaretClare: She doesn't sound selfish, she sounds desperate. She's convinced that this one thing will make her beautiful. It's ridiculous but she's convinced. It's very sad, not a reason to get angry at her. I'm angry she thinks it's the only way to be beautiful.

Primrose

Don't put yourself in futher debt because of this. You already owe money? What will happen and how will you manage if you take on more debt and you lose your job? For goodness sake, be sensible. Just tell her "NO" and refuse to enter into further discussion. A "boob job" is not a necessity. Ensuring a roof over the head and the bills being paid for your girlfriend and daughter are the things you should be concentrating on. Remind her that we're about to go into Recession big time and that she needs to get her priorities in order.

margaretclare

Cerisa, I completely agree with Primrose and with rosie-lee above. They have put it so much better than I could. It really is a question of priorities, and what this young woman is doing is spoiling her relationships, with mother, with boy-friend, and is wasting the precious time she has with her new baby. Time, I might add, which will never return.

Of course I am not 'angry' with her - how could I be, I don't know her from Adam's great-niece. I just think she is being incredibly stupid.

judy_scott

DO NOT take out any loan in your name, you have to pay if it does go wrong, and anyway, she'll have the CCJ wiped off her credit file after 6 years, so if she really wants it she can have it on finance then.....IF the cost fits in with your finances!!!!!
She needs to be happy that she's got a man that loves her & healthy kids, just think of the risks with surgery, and look at the bodge jobs some of the stars have had....Love yourself as you are girl, your kids and your man do!!

Tiger_greeneyes

I don't think this will go down well but it's my own personal opinion - I apologise in advance if I offend anyone!!

I'm dead against any surgery that isn't absolutely necessary and truly detest this vanity culture that's become so malignant to our society over the past decade or two. If your girlfriend's boobs meant that much to her, then why did she go in for having children, knowing that her body would change? It's natural to lose breast fullness after having a baby.

I don't know how anyone (especially someone who is lucky enough to have two healthy young children) could risk their own health/life and be happy about putting their little ones into debt for something that, at the end of the day, is entirely unnecessary, potentially fatal and above all, so superficial.

£7,500 is an awful lot of money, especially when you have a young family - and even more so in a depressing financial climate such as this.

If she really wants surgery then fine, but don't spent what you haven't got - she should save up for it and put her kids needs before her own wants.

Errata

No doubt the current credit crunch will make the decision for her.

Dinah93

When she tells you you are being unfair does she stomp her foot too?!Seriously this girl sounds like Veruca Salt, and if its PND then she needs to see a Doctor as that is a perfectly reasonable excuse for behaving like this. However if it isn't she is being irrational and putting her own desires ahead of her families needs. I can't beleive any new mother would value perky boobs over being able to hold her own baby. That is a lot of money in this climate, and you need to take care of your current debts before taking on new ones. What would you do if inflation starts climbing?

I loaned my ex money to pay for training, we'd been together a few years, I felt comfortable it was an investment in 'our' future. A few months later he got violent and more than likely had a fling, although I have no concrete proof of this. I never saw a penny back while we were together and now have to face him in small claims court. How would you feel if her perky new boobs attract the attention of someone new and exciting? Boobs alone might not make her feel good about herself but the attention of someone else might. And you're left paying for those very fancy bits of plastic that have made her feel so good about herself, and left you in debt and single. She's nearly out of the CCJ, and her body needs time to bounce back from pregnancy, she can have a little patience and see how she feels once the CCJ is cleared and the onus on paying back the money is on her shoulders, not her poor BF or mothers.

KittyKate

Having an operation won't make your gf feel any better about the way she looks. Please take her to see a doctor, and not for surgery either. She sounds depressed and frustrated.

When I was a teenager my friends and family told me I was pretty but all I could see were the imperfections - big nose, big ears, little eyes...! I am so sad I lost my teenage years to the bite of low self esteem. I have had no surgery, but yet I look in the mirror now and I see a happy, average looking, content woman. And I will never want to change myself again. I have the support of a good man, and it sounds like your girlfriend needs you more now than she'll ever need seven grand.

Pssst

There are a number of issues here. The first and most glaring one is the seeming lack of communication between you both and yet you have been committed enough to have two children together. Or did they just happen? Are you worried that you will both split and you will be left with the debt or is the real issue that you have this fear that your life is now cast in stone, i.e you ,her and your two children and it is you who might be off? Either way,there is nothing worse than a woman with false tit s. Some women have this paranoia about tits. They think big is best. I much prefer a natural woman regardless of size and i'm sure many men feel the same. Do you both have so much money that you can squander it on trivia such as this? I wouldnt entertain signing up for her knockers.