Am I over reacting???

bestpud

I'd be quite horrified if I found myself judging my firends by the gifts they do or don't buy! :eek:

My friends mean the world to me and I'd be 100 times more interested in their company than what they brought with them.

Broken_hearted

Yes way over reacting and the adjusting presents as she hasn't spent enough is just cruel. We spent years struggling with no money but I tried so hard to get my sisters kids the best I could afford, she stopped buying my kids nice presents and got them cheap tat. That hurt so much as I was overstretching what little I had yet she was punishing my children. It was worse because she spent a fortune on her hubbies family.

GracieP

You realise the country is heading into what is predicted to be the worst recession in our lifetimes? That mortgage interest rates have risen and are crippling a lot of people? That fuel and food costs have sky rocketed? That a lot of people are losing their jobs, while many, many others fear theirs will go next? You have no idea how this woman is coping financially at the moment, often people feel embarrassed to tell their friends if they have money problems.

If I was you I'd just feel grateful that I don't have money problems, and glad that I have a friend who cared to come and see me and bring me any gift. Sorry if I sound harsh, but it was an awfully materialistic thing to get upset over.

By the way, congratulations on your new daughter! :T

Violetta_2

Try not to stress over it honey, my brother spends quite a bit regularly on my dd his niece, despite only living half an hours drive away, and actually having visited shops 10 minutes from our house he hasn't bothered to see her in over a year and a half. That has hurt me and had me in tears too many times to mention. I've now decided not to let it bother me (well I'll try) . It's easy to spend money (for some people) but I think it's spending time that really matter's.
Oh and another thing:j congratulations:T on your beautiful little girl. How gorgeous is she?

pulliptears

LGDNUFC wrote: »

How was I in the wrong?

FWIW I dont think you were If you could afford it and this is a close friend why not. Sometimes we run away with ourselves when we spot a cute rattle or baby gro and the gift keeps growing. You obviously spent what you felt comfortable with as a generous and good friend.

Dormouse

I'm sorry but I do think you're overreacting. I really don't see what the big deal is, and if she is a good friend, I can't see why that should change.

I would certainly not say anything to her, it would just spoil the atmosphere between you.

I am sure she did not do it to upset you in any way. Ok you say you feel that she didn't put any thought into it but maybe she thought it was something you would really love? There's a million perfectly good reasons why she gave it to you, I wouldn't stress out about this episode at all.

And congrats on the birth of your little girl - how lovely! :T

JoJoB

Congratulations on your little girl. :j

I would look at other things to measure your friendship with this lady to be honest. You may find she will be invaluable in providing other things like a listening ear when you are feeling down, or support when you are tired in these early weeks with bubba. Friends who offer babysitting are worth their weight in gold!

And be aware that some people simply don't attach as much importance to the giving of expensive presents as you do. For you it seems symbolic of how much you appreciate a person, but that person may choose to show their appreciation of your friendship in other ways that they might find more meaningful.

I can't afford to give expensive presents to my Goddaughter, nieces and nephews, but I am very generous with my time and affections - and this is appreciated very much.

ali-t

*Louise* wrote: »

Been there!!

Someone gave me a summer outfit for my little girl, but the size meant it wouldn't fit her till winter - I went to the shop to see if I could exchange for a size that would fit her only to find out it was from the Spring/Summer 2005 range!!:rotfl:

Mind you , I would have felt a bit miffed if it was a close friend who had done it.

OP - you just need to try and let it go. Maybe your friend was short of money, there's no point in asking why she did it, it will likely just embarrass you both and could be detrimental for your friendship.

In these times of money saving, ebay is a godsend and your friend might have bought it BNWT but if it didn't explicitly say 'this season' then they would have no idea it was from 3 years ago. I commend the money saving :cool:

Although if she said to you that you could swap it if it wasn't right, that is just a bit too brass necked!

seven-day-weekend

Can't see what all the fuss is about. She needn't have given anything. What you spent on her is immaterial imho.

It's probably your hormones being all over the place from giving birth.

Congratulations on your new arrival!

Jojo_the_Tightfisted

So, if she hadn't bothered at all, would you be posting going 'How could she not buy a present'? It's a present that she didn't have to get you and perhaps money is tight for her right now. Older children cost even more than babies, as they don't get presents - parents have to buy them more things.

Those post baby hormones can be a right pain, just relax and enjoy your new arrival and forget about what other people have or haven't done for a while.

Congratulations!