Depression Support Thread

Horasio

Stephb1986 wrote: »

Things have been brilliant for ages. Then on friday things just changed he said something not nice and i said i didnt think i was IN love with him anymore and thats what this is all about. I hate myself so much I didn't mean it.

This was the longest relationship i've been in and was pretty sure he was the one.

Steph xx

It can't be that strong if it took one 'wrong' comment for it to end. Is he quite young himself?

Does he know about your depression? You need someone who is more understanding, rather than someone saying something 'not nice' then ending it because you weren't sure if you were 'in' love with him. It isn't easy to know if you are 'in' love with someone.

Please don't beat yourself up over your comment, he sounds very immature from what you say and anyone who is worth anything would allow this 'mistake'.

I know I sound like an old woman but 22 is young and there are better guys out there for you.

Horasio

Sazbo wrote: »

I totally agree with you, CC. My mind is so woolley at the mo, you've articulated that far better than I ever could have xx

Thank you:)

I think some schools of therapy like to adopt the 'input/output' computer analogy when it comes to explaining the workings of the human mind - "change the input and you'll change the output". It just strikes me as a bit glib. It is simplistic to an almost dangerous extent. But that's just my opinion.

Good therapy is not a quick fix like fixing a bug in software. Again that's just my opinion. It's been the hardest thing i've ever had to do, tbh. But then again, it's about revisiting things that are painful to us. I guess I tend to feel that because I still get upset during sessions that this must mean I've not progressed. But when I look back to a year ago, I can see with retrospect that I have in fact come a very long way.

As AB says, therapy works at the subconscious level, so the effects may not always be visible to us, or accessible to our conscious mind - but that doesn't necessairly mean it isn't working. Or that it has no "use". I was really dismayed and upset by the attitude of Shaz's counsellor :mad: Shaz is a wonderful person who deserves far, far better.

I agree

As you say CC, counselling should be a supportive space - somewhere you can revisit painful feelings in a safe way; in a way that allows you to feel grief, anger, etc and then, with time, move on from it. It is not about lip-service or glib solutions.

Lol CC - I should have just left it at your excellent explanation and not subjected the lovely people here to my waffling and muddled reply!:rolleyes:

Maybe different things suit different people. What's wrong with a pluralist approach? We are well used here to people appearing on this thread with well-meant, one-size-fits-all 'cures' for depression. "If only you all do 'X' or 'Y', you'll beat depression." etc. If only! I wouldn't dare presume that what's worked for me would work for everyone. I want everyone to beat this terrible condition, but by whatever method works - by fair means, or foul! :T

Anyway I'll shut up now! Sorry for the ramble everyone.:o

Much love to you all,
Sazzy xxxxxxxx

You certainly don't ramble and I find your posts to be very wise and articulate:)

Stephb1986_2

He's 25 and im 22 he's really stubborn. He thinks i over exagerate things and make things all about me that was his nasty comment.

He knows that im on anti depressants and it lovely most of the time its just sometimes that he's off with me.

I would do anything to have him back right now

Steph xx

budget_budd

Im at work and I don't want to go home, not sure why, Not sure whats going on Ive felt a bit funny for a few days now.
First becoming obsessed with the gorgeous engagement ring that I want but OH says is too expensive (I think its worth it) and then I was thinking about a friend here the other day just can't get him out of my head. Yes he's a friend Im not about to run away with him though, what about my babies? Im sure my medication is making me go funny.
Anyways I'd better leave before I get locked in the building but not sure where I am going

Stephb1986_2

budget_budd wrote: »

Im at work and I don't want to go home, not sure why, Not sure whats going on Ive felt a bit funny for a few days now.
First becoming obsessed with the gorgeous engagement ring that I want but OH says is too expensive (I think its worth it) and then I was thinking about a friend here the other day just can't get him out of my head. Yes he's a friend Im not about to run away with him though, what about my babies? Im sure my medication is making me go funny.
Anyways I'd better leave before I get locked in the building but not sure where I am going

Maybe go for a little walk around the shops hun to clear your head, get that last minute christmas shopping

Steph xx

moneysavingmonkey85

Hi all
I have read a few posts, and you guys all seem nice, so I wondered if I could join. I have been very low for quite some time now, and today I finally bit the bullet and went to my GP. I didnt find him very helpful, just weighed me, took my blood pressure and gave me a questionnaire. Wrote out a prescription and told me that the waiting list for counselling is up to 14 months (and that he was not prepared to put me on it!)
I really dont know what to do. I dont take any medication at all (not even paracetamol) and I have not been to the chemist, as I'm not sure how the pills can help. My mum and sister(since she was 16!) both take anti-depressants and I don't see its helped them.
Does anyone have any advice/where else I can get counselling?

Thanks

Horasio

moneysavingmonkey85 wrote: »

Hi all
I have read a few posts, and you guys all seem nice, so I wondered if I could join. I have been very low for quite some time now, and today I finally bit the bullet and went to my GP. I didnt find him very helpful, just weighed me, took my blood pressure and gave me a questionnaire. Wrote out a prescription and told me that the waiting list for counselling is up to 14 months (and that he was not prepared to put me on it!)
I really dont know what to do. I dont take any medication at all (not even paracetamol) and I have not been to the chemist, as I'm not sure how the pills can help. My mum and sister(since she was 16!) both take anti-depressants and I don't see its helped them.
Does anyone have any advice/where else I can get counselling?

Thanks

Hi MSM85

Welcome to our lovely thread. We are all very caring:)

Your GP sounds rather useless. The questionnaire is to gauge your depression severity. If it isn't really bad, then you won't get such urgent help, cutbacks etc. It sounds like your family have depression issues too. Maybe they are on the wrong meds.

We can't discuss meds on here but if you are worried then research it on the net by Googling the name.

As far as counselling is concerned, you could goto another GP and stress the severity of your low feeling or go private and pay for a counsellor, but it can be hit and miss. Like anyone there are ones that are good and others not so good for a particular person. There are so many types of counselling, so knowing the best type for you is good to know, so you can look for one specialising in your issue.

You can ring the Samaritans if you need to talk in the meantime.

Plus you can talk about how you feel on here. We have all been thro it in varying degrees and offer some invaluable support.

Horasio

budget_budd wrote: »

Im at work and I don't want to go home, not sure why, Not sure whats going on Ive felt a bit funny for a few days now.
First becoming obsessed with the gorgeous engagement ring that I want but OH says is too expensive (I think its worth it) and then I was thinking about a friend here the other day just can't get him out of my head. Yes he's a friend Im not about to run away with him though, what about my babies? Im sure my medication is making me go funny.
Anyways I'd better leave before I get locked in the building but not sure where I am going

Is there something at home you are trying to avoid?

Regarding the ring - think MSE here, is it too expensive? or can you get it on interest free credit or wait for a bit longer or get a cheaper ring?

Again, we can't get too deep about meds but have you just started them? Maybe you are adjusting. If it is them, then see your GP asap if it is making you feel strange.

Horasio

Stephb1986 wrote: »

He's 25 and im 22 he's really stubborn. He thinks i over exagerate things and make things all about me that was his nasty comment.

He knows that im on anti depressants and it lovely most of the time its just sometimes that he's off with me.

I would do anything to have him back right now

Steph xx

He might be older but is he mature enough? I know it is challenging to be with someone with depression issues and it takes maturity to cope. Maybe he is finding it hard to cope with it. It seems harsh that one comment would drive him to finish the relationship.

To someone who doesn't suffer depression, it can look like someone is overreacting but if he really cared about you, he wouldn't care about whether you were overreacting or not and do his level best to make it comfortable for you when you feel scared.

Stubborn people are hard work and they can be draining. Quite a lot to take when you feel low on top. Is there a pattern in his behaviour? Does he really help you?

I would write down the good and bad about your relationship, be really honest and think about the smallest things. Sometimes it can seem that the good outweighs the bad, especially when they are not there, but think, how much of the time has he made you really happy and really miserable. Which one wins?

What are you missing and what can you do without?

moneysavingmonkey85

thanks. I have to say I wouldnt know which type of therapy would suit, or even what my particular 'issue' is? i will try lookin up the meds before I decide if i want to take them. Thanks though.