Depression Support Thread

LadyMorticia

Good morning (even though it is a freezing one and I'm in bed not wanting to brave the world.lol.)

Gemma is coming tomorrow now.Although it took her a lot of faffing about yesterday to actually tell me that.lol.
I was talking to Sam and Sam said that I shouldn't just revolve my life around other people and drop my plans for them. =/

Gemma knows about Sam, but she's jealous. Gemma is in love with me, but I don't reciprocate those feelings. I want Gemz and Sam here for my birthday but Gemma is throwing a hissy fit about it. I don't know what to do for the best. I think in the end I may just be like "I'll spend my birthday alone then". On my 19th birthday I had Lottie, Ben, Toni and Karl here. Lottie and Karl hate eachother. There were many arguments, without a regard for how it would make me feel, seeing as it was my birthday and all.
Sam says that no matter how much she tries to start an argument, he's not going to give into it.
I've been trying to be really nice about it. Trying to make her feel comfortable with everything but eventually I am going to be in a relationship, and all I can think about now is how much it's going to hurt her.
Also, do you rememeber what happened in June? With Karl and treating me in an inappropriate way? Well, we've started talking again and I'm working on forgiving him. He apologised and I told him that if he touches me in such a way again then that will be the end of our friendship for good. He understands that. But now, he's saying how he's never fallen out of love with me. I'm like "What the hell?". I don't understand. He says that I have something about me that draws people to me but he doesn't know what it is. I'm one confused mouse, I can tell you. Wondering why I said mouse? Well, Sam has nicknamed me Annimouse. Lol!
Tiff, I know you're thread cat, but please don't eat me.

Things with Sam are great at the moment. Although, I was having a bad night last night on webcam having flashbacks and crying....but he didn't walk away or anything...he pulled funny faces on webcam to cheer me up.lol. It worked, actually!

Anyway, this has been on long post. I'm sorry.
I hope you all have a good day.

xx

beachbeth

shazrobo wrote: »

morning all, how is everybody this morning?
am finding it increasingly difficult to get up now its dark in a morning, anybody else finding the same?

I was lying in bed this morning thinking how dark it was - makes you want to turn over and go back to sleep. I was thinking how lovely it would be if there was a pretty blanket of snow everywhere and the sun was shining. How bright and crisp that would be (not nice if you have to travel in it though!)

The thing I hate most about British weather is the dullness of it. We always have cloud above. I don't mind the cold if its nice and bright. Having depression I already have a black cloud above my head sometimes so it doesn't help having all this dullness too!

Tulip

:hello: Everyone,

Hope all is well,Anni just do what is right for you on who comes to see you etc and it is your home they are coming to anyway.I know Gemma will find it hard once you have a relationship with someone but they will have to get used to the idea sooner rather than later and its up to you on who you want to date too.Just take it easy and enjoy having her see you tomorrow and also Sam.Just do what is best and comfortable for you as well.

I dreamt about a packet of Smarties last night too for the first time :rotfl:

Have a nice day everyone


*hugs* to those that need one


love and light,

Katie xxx

alba37

LadyMorticia wrote: »

Tiff, I know you're thread cat, but please don't eat me.

:rotfl: :rotfl: :rotfl:

Morning all! Well you got a smile on my face on the dreary, dark, wet, wintery morning Anni!

I've been to M&S and got 2 meals for £10, and been to Morrisons for some shopping... and put it all away already! Quite pleased with myself!!!

May pop down to see a friend later, but apart from that no plans today. Make the most of your quiet day Shaz, it's a stressful week for you coming up. How are the boys? I can't wait for M's appointment next week. Will be getting some results but still no sign of when the other tests are getting done yet.

Oh Anni, what a mix up going on with you! I just don't know what to suggest. All I can say is we don't always have the same feelings for another person and that's life. As long as you are not giving Gemma false hopes and being clear with her, you are doing the best you can in this situation. If she's jealous, it's quite flattering but she has to accept how you feel. Sam sounds like a gem, and maybe it would be nice spending your birthday with him?

Morning Katie, how's the telly going?

Hope everyone is well today,

A x

Horasio

Diamond78 wrote: »

Hi Guys,
Hope all is well and good with everyone. Ive wanted to post for ages but i dont feel comfortable anymore on here. Before I could post when I was having a bad day, I could let out how I was feeling, I would also post on good days, and try and help other ppl when they were having a bad time. Ive not been the same since I got back off my holiday. Maybe I got it wrong with this thread. I thought it was ok to come and post what your feeling. It has done me wonders in the past when Ive been low. Now Im at my lowest and cant even post any more. maybe another thread should be started where ppl can post positive thoughts like someone had said on here. I took that comment personally. Am I the only one that suffers with this S@@@ illness? I feel Im the only person in the world and no one understands me when I have tried to explain how im feeling and why Im feeling like that. I have tried sooo dam hard to help myself but what ppl dont understand is when things happen in your life that is not good, it makes you worse. I feel im cracking under pressure and I cant hold things together. The docor cant help coz the events in my life are currently ongoing. The stuff going on is impossible to change or do anything about it. Despair is a horrible thing,

Please don't feel driven away - you have been posting for ages and I have enjoyed reading your posts.

I have been busy for a couple of days and notice a couple of the regulars aren't feeling comfortable posting on here. It was dead a few days ago, so wonder if it is connected?

Remember, the ignore button is very useful.

Horasio

feelinggood wrote: »

Just to say this will be my last post in this thread. I can't post in a thread that no longer stands for what it used to. This isn't a dig at anyone, its just this thread is not what it used to be. I'm sad about this, and I wish we could go back to how we were. Good luck to everyone on your journeys, and remember even if it feels like it, you aren't alone.

Sorry to hear that, like I said to Diamond78, don't feel driven away. I always look forward to seeing you on here and you have been really helpful to me.

PM me if you need to talk.

alba37

Morning CCStar, how are you today?

A x

Horasio

alba37 wrote: »

Morning CCStar, how are you today?

A x

Hi Alba

How is sunny Scotland?:p
We are going to get the rain later:(

My son has gone to visit a few old mates up near Edinburgh, will get the full update after he gets back next week. I am a bit worried about the rain he is going to get coming back down south, especially after that accident on the M6.

My OH and I went for a drive on Tuesday, in the autumn sunshine, to the Cotswolds, haven't been there for 16 years (we lived near there for years before living in Scotland), it reminded us a bit of some parts of Highland Scotland.

We are slowly getting the house repaired by our skinflint landlord and hopefully we can get rid of them and properly settle into the house - took the place on 2 months ago! And we are paying a pretty high rent compared to what we paid before.:mad:

I couldn't get to sleep till late so feel a bit tired, think I have yet another cold (can't get the heating right, either too hot or too cold) and feel clutsy just now, but happier.

I was wondering about the £10 M&S meals, are they good value?

alba37

Hi CCStar,

The weather has been terrible here and heating has been on full blast for ages! I'm sure you'll hear all about it when your son gets back. I hope he enjoys his trip. That M6 accident was shocking, so sad.

I'm pretty tired too today, but am just going out to see a friend, then hopefully nothing else for the rest of the day.

I really like the £10 deal in Marks. Today there was a choice of a chicken, salmon, chicken breasts (in a sauce, I thnk), pork medallions, chicken pie or cheese pie. Then you pick a accompliment from, roasted veg, mash pot, stuffing, or green veg. A pudding from, chocloate tart, lemon souffle, choc bread pudding.. forgotton the rest! And a bottle of wine! It's a pretty good deal and some of the things would do more than 2 people, pies, were 3-4 portions & the chicken would obviously feed more.

Good you are getting the repairs done at last. Hopefully you will be able to settle better soon.

Take care,

A x

LadyMorticia

Heya Ccstar. :wave:

What makes it more complicated Alba, is that Gemma is my ex, so I used to have feelings for her but they deminished. As a girlfriend she is very clingy though, and I like my independence in a relationship so it was doomed from the start anyway, but you never know unless you try.
I have been very straight with her. I have made it blatant (but not without tact) that the feelings she has for me are not reciprocal on my part.
I love her as a friend. My goodness, she is a fantastic friend but I cannot help who I fall in love with.
It just does hurt me a bit that she is having a hissy fit about Sam, so now I've stopped talking about him which is not how I want it to be as she's my best friend and we're supposed to talk about everything but I don't want to rub salt in the wound or whatever so have refrained from discussing him with her.

I have been playing piggy in the middle with a lot of my friends lately, and to be honest it's driving me nuts and it's childish. I am not happy to take part in playground games and now I just think those around me should grow up.
Sam is being great. I can trust him, just like I would trust Gemz and Emz so have discussed how I feel with him, and he says that no matter how much she tries to cause conflict at my birthday he's not going to give in to it.
I just want my birthday to be a good one. It's just over 5 weeks away now and I've already had a few people cancel on me so my emotions are being tested at the moment.

xx