Depression Support Thread

Jo_R_2

beachbeth wrote: »

Jo_r - did your OH go out in the end?

Yes - we came to a mutual agreement which involved him cooking his own dinner and getting me takeaway for dinner

It was all very amusing seeing him squirm but in the end I thought I'd be grown up about it rather than making him suffer lol!

Truth be told, I was desperate for a bit of 'me' time so here I am gallavanting about MSE and doing girly stuff like straightening my hair

Agree with you beathbeth and fg about feeling like this is a bit of solace. I like that I can come here, even after not posting for a week maybe, and dive right in, post and catch up on how others are. I feel like I can say how I feel and don't worry about people judging me and people always have a little something to say, whether it's directly to me or something supportive to someone else. I like that.

MightyMen

Hi guys.

I suffered, quite severely, from depression for quite a long time. It pretty much took over my life and caused me to push away the people I love most It's only now- in hindsight- that I realise I was pushing away the people who could most help me.

I'm very lucky in that I now have my girlfriend by my side at every step and I think the best thing any of us can do is find someone to trust and confide in- mother, father, brother, sister, girlfriend, boyfriend etc.

Talking knowing you're not going to be judged really helps x

Sweet_Pea_5

Hi all. Just managed to sit down on my laptop for a few moments, but not sure how long that will last DS is being rather grizzly tonight!! Got a headache but other than that I feel a lot better from the past few days, my fever seems to have gone and the pain in my side has too, mostly.
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Miroslav – Yes, people seem to underestimate my problem because I'm very good at hiding it. I suffer terribly before an appointment just about hold it together at the appointment and then suffer terribly again after. So they think 'she can't have anything wrong she was fine to me' but having to do that on a daily basis for more than about 39minutes would probably set me to a break down! People judge too easily on appearances I think.
I have my fiance, and my parents who I am close with. As for friends I haven't really had any of those for years! It's quite isolated. I would say I have one, but even then I very rarely get to see her or have any contact with her because she is more interested in spending time with people who like to go out and drink themselves stupid in noisy night clubs. I think we just don't have anything in common anymore. I don't really trust anyone (or myself) enough to try and go out and make new friends. I have issues with myself that stop me from being able to do that.
And yes, hehe he will never have an excuse to forget my birthday!! x


Diamond78 - Thank you. I hope you start to feel better in yourself soon. I have been where you are at many, many times and know how hard it is. All I can say is that you will find a man who loves you, someone who will think you are beautiful and wonderful. Someone who is shallow enough to let scars and bags under the eyes bother them even a little bit isn't worth your time anyway! I have scars on my arms and legs from past self harm, and now huge ones on my stomach from a c-section and having my appendix removed, as well as a whole lot of other things I find disgusting about myself including weight gain, stretch marks, bad skin... the list goes on (I don't think there's one thing about myself that I like even a little bit), and I was forever putting myself down and feeling as if no-one could ever love someone as ugly as me, but I was wrong you know, there are some amazing men out there, I found my OH and he calls me beautiful or sexy all the time even when I look my worst after a major operation! So even though things may seem pretty bleak right now I'm sure after you have been to the doctors (make a list and go through it with him/her don't feel silly because it's worth it!) and once you start to feel more stable again you'll be able to get out there (or perhaps even online, if you're open to things like that) and find yourself that someone special! The trick is to let it happen in it's own time. I hope you start to feel better soon!! x


CCStar – Aw thank you. To be honest I don't feel like I've coped at all, I've just been numb as opposed to coping, but I suppose it's better than breaking down completely – at least for my partner and son. Hopefully when I'm recovered fully from my operation I can start trying to get things back on track with my overall mental recovery. Even if I only recover slightly. There was a time when I would run for the hills at the thought of getting better because with it comes thoughts that people will expect too much of me and then I will just break again, but since having my son it's given me more strength I think. Anyway, I've been catching up on rest today, as much as I can, and yet I feel like I've been running around more than ever! My sons door bouncer came today so we got all excited and let him have a play, I'm sure I pulled my side though. Just going to sit on the sofa for the next hour and try my hardest not to do anything until I have to get up to run my OH's after work bath, lol! (I'm sure my son will decide he needs a feed and nappy change though)

Miroslav

beachbeth wrote: »

I agree with this. I sometimes read back a text I have sent and realise that it comes across completely different to how I actually meant it. When you are talking to someone face to face or on the phone you can get so much meaning from their tone or facial expressions and, of course, this doesn't come across in a text or an online post.

As I said, though, when you are suffering badly with depression you just can't take onboard what anyone else is going through because your own head is full fit to bursting. Its like a man with 2 broken legs trying to walk someone across a road (sorry about the comparisons again!!!:rolleyes: )

Everyone misreads me either here or in a text, so sometimes I have too go around the houses to explain what I say, although I shouldn't have too, I do so to try and not upset someone

I stay away from here often as it's hard to 'help' others when you need help yourself, hence coming on with small talk mostly

The good thing is, I don't care what people think of me anymore, whereas I used too.

My motto - the world has 6.5+ billion people, if some don't like me, there are a few more that might

beachbeth

Sweet_Pea wrote: »

Miroslav – Yes, people seem to underestimate my problem because I'm very good at hiding it. I suffer terribly before an appointment just about hold it together at the appointment and then suffer terribly again after. So they think 'she can't have anything wrong she was fine to me' but having to do that on a daily basis for more than about 39minutes would probably set me to a break down! People judge too easily on appearances I think.

I think they do too. I have a friend who is lovely but when I see her she will say "but you're ok now, aren't you?" as though my depression and anxiety are all things of the past. Its hard to explain that the only reason I am sitting in her lounge drinking tea and chatting is because Im having a good day. If I was having a bad day she wouldn't see me at all. Im too good at putting a brave face on things and then people can't quite believe that I am as bad as they thought. On bad days I don't answer the door, the phone and I don't leave the house and my close family rally round. Outsiders don't know a thing.

One appointment at a doctors can't prove that you suffer from depression or not. They would have to live with you to really know.

Miroslav

Sweet_Pea wrote: »

Miroslav – Yes, people seem to underestimate my problem because I'm very good at hiding it. I suffer terribly before an appointment just about hold it together at the appointment and then suffer terribly again after. So they think 'she can't have anything wrong she was fine to me' but having to do that on a daily basis for more than about 39minutes would probably set me to a break down! People judge too easily on appearances I think.
I have my fiance, and my parents who I am close with. As for friends I haven't really had any of those for years! It's quite isolated. I would say I have one, but even then I very rarely get to see her or have any contact with her because she is more interested in spending time with people who like to go out and drink themselves stupid in noisy night clubs. I think we just don't have anything in common anymore. I don't really trust anyone (or myself) enough to try and go out and make new friends. I have issues with myself that stop me from being able to do that.
And yes, hehe he will never have an excuse to forget my birthday!! x

I think that's an issue for alot of people. They think that if you do your shopping, go out for a coffee, even smile, that you are okay, not realising that depressed people need to shop, need to do something to cheer themselves up and are entitled to smile sometimes.

The issues with oneself is often the main problem. It's often not what others think of us, but what we think of ourselves. We can be told we are great, good at this and that and are nice, but unless we really believe it...Does my bum look big in this? No? Well I think it does. It doesn't matter what people say, we have our own beliefs about ourselves that are often very difficult to change.

absolutebounder

Miroslav wrote: »

I. It doesn't matter what people say, we have our own beliefs about ourselves that are often very difficult to change.

Beliefs are easy to change if you are prepared to look at things from a different angle.

Tulip

:hello: Everyone,

I have been looking at fancydress websites for fancydress for my carnival without success,I will retry tomorrow but I did find this picture of a dog as Wonder Woman :rotfl:





I will chat tomorrow

Night! Night!


love and light,

Katie xxx

Miroslav

absolutebounder wrote: »

Beliefs are easy to change if you are prepared to look at things from a different angle.

They can be.

It's harder when after years of abuse, either from someone or your ownself, as those thoughts are left so indented within you, it takes alot more than a few good things to make you believe any different.

I used to blame myself for everything, but now I just blame everyone else. What is my fault, I intend to sort out over time. It won't be an overnight fix.

Miroslav

Tulip wrote: »

:hello: Everyone,

I have been looking at fancydress websites for fancydress for my carnival without success,I will retry tomorrow but I did find this picture of a dog as Wonder Woman :rotfl:





I will chat tomorrow

Night! Night!


love and light,

Katie xxx

:rotfl::rotfl::rotfl::rotfl::rotfl::rotfl: