ex and would be ex-gamblers support thread

Raindrops_&_Moonbeams

I tried to put the block on but it only gave me options for windows or mac. Anyone know of one for firefox please?

cantcope

you use the one for windows unless you are working on a mac. The browser you use makes no difference.

Raindrops_&_Moonbeams

cantcope wrote: »

you use the one for windows unless you are working on a mac. The browser you use makes no difference.

Hi, I did try, twice in fact and it wouldn't run. The whole system in linux, hubby is very anti anything windows/microsoft so none of our machines run it. I will try it again and tell you what message I got as I can't remember off the top of my head. :cool:

cantcope

Welcome back movingonup. Why say you arent going to tell people how top uninstall something so desperately needed then put clues on your post?! i have reported this in the hope it is removed.
Thanks to you i am now wondering how easy it would be to uninstall on my laptop should i get a weak moment. This is NOT something we want on this thread. If you read this please remove from your post.

If you can get around K9 then what thinks you wont get around a website block? Gamblock is good but you have to pay. Please dont post anything else like this on this thread. I am extemely upset this morning and feel i've lost my safety net thanks to your post.

movingonup_2

As requested, the message was deleted. please note though I did come on here looking for help and support. I feel quite guilty now which hasn't helped

cantcope

Thanks for removing the post. No need to feel guilty. You will get support here but please bear in mind that not everyone on here wants to know how to remove a block they rely on to help them stay off a bet. I felt like someone had dangled a bet in front of me when i read that.

You will get all the help and support you need here. Let us know how we can help and we'll do our best. Like my post above offering ideas for other blocks you can use Gamblock. i used this for a couple of years before i found K9. it is not used with a password so might not be as easy for you to crack?

Do you know why you started gambling again?

cantcope

hi Raindrops. Might be worth looking at gamblock instead then x

cantcope

Hi Brenster, First off well done for posting. It takes a lot to get it all down in writing. You CAN stop gambling, but only if you really want to. Wishing you could stop wont work. You have to do something about it.

Trust me when I say that while you are paying off the debt yourself as its your problem it is inadvertently affecting your wife as while you are paying off debt she and your family are going without. The more debt you riase the more they will go without.

For me GA is the only thing that has stopped me gambling. I tried over and over again on my own and failed miserably after a few months or once the calls stopped.
GA gives me a place to go as often as I like full of people that understand why I did it. I will never beat the addiction, only arrest it. While ever I continue to go to my meetings and follow the advice I get there I know I wont gamble.

Have you told your wife you have slipped again? I would advise you do so that she can support you too.

If you haven’t already, get a block on your pc at home and on your phone. Give control of your finances to your wife so that you have NO access to money. The less you have the less you can spend. It’s pretty amazing how little we actually need each day.

You are lucky to have still got your wife, please don’t jeapordise your relationship by hiding things. You will eventually get found out.

Your debt can be dealt with and if you stop gambling it will not get any worse. Pay it off at a manageable amount. Not at an amount where you want to win some because you are going short….

Once you have realised that you cannot win it will be easy to stop.
Does this sound like you? Cant stop when I’m winning, can’t stop when I’m losing? If that’s the case, fact is you just cant stop and you will never win as when you do you’ll want to win more and when you don’t you’ll want to chase your losses.

You talk about spending £200 in 2 hours, trust me, carry on and it will get worse. I was spending that in ten minutes online and I know of people that did more than that! It is progressive.

It might not seem like it now but it’s not about the money. Gambling affects your life, relationships, self respect, pride, dignity. It’s usually about a need to escape something or a need for a thrill, high, whatever you want to call it.

I lost my self worth, was unable to sleep, lied to people I loved, did things I am deeply ashamed of, made myself ill with worry. I turned into someone I detest. I want to be a good person and I believe that now I am.

Changing as a person is the hardest thing about stopping gambling but in my experience, one without the other wont work.

Consider going to a meeting. You will be made to feel welcome, given numbers of people you can call whenever you want to talk and most importantly be among people that understand.

Sorry really long post but I want to offer what I have x

My advice, which you don’t have to take if you don’t want to:

Tell your wife
Give wife control of your finances
Block on pc
Get to a GA Meeting
Stop talking about it and DO it (like you said in your post)
Be pleased you’ve joined the thread and recognised that you have a problem

Don’t gamble today J

cantcope

Only you can decide when to tell your wife.

Think about this? Do you think she'd rather you were honest now? Tell her you messed up but want her love and support and that you plan to go to GA, you've posted on a help forum and are making steps to make sure it doesnt happen again. Or in 6 months time once you've cleared your debt...."darling, i've been lying to you for 6 months because i gambled again but didnt want to tell you until i could prove that i could pay off my debt??, I've been going to GA meetings behind your back because i didnt think you'd support me or understand, typing on self help forums and want you to now trust and support me even though i've been hiding it from you for months"

I didnt have a partner to tell when i stopped gambling. I did have parents to tell though who were bitterly disappointed for me. I lived alone so was only hurting myself. I'm only giving you these examples as what i've seen over 6 years in GA and online forums x

Oh_Dear

Cor Blimey, its been a busy thread this. I gambled at the end of January, really really disappointed in myself.

Am wondering if I really have made progress. Since March last year I have had three gambling "episodes" each one has cost me in excess of £2000. Needless to say money I dont have. Why why why!!!!

Anyway one day at a time I have managed to stay gambling free this month wahey!!

Cant give up on myself, and indeed I dont. Just thought I'd say hello. "Hello"

Geordie.