Housing for pregnant 17 year old

barnaby-bear

moneysavinmonkey wrote: »

there was also a documentary on teenage mums on sometime this year on Ch4 I think. Similar sort of thing, temporarily housed by the council but had to move around a lot. Didn't really have adequate facitilities. Miles away from their family + friends - they seemed to spend most the documentary sitting on a bus trying to go visit someone, or to the doctor, or laundrette etc. Is your daughter prepared for this - could be the incentive for her + bf to get a job (or two!) each.

That's something no-one has suggested if the BF can't work could he be the primary carer so the mum can? If he can't get a job maybe she is better qualified/more attractive for employers? It's becoming increasingly common with couples where the woman has higher earning potential.

geoffky

Can i just say good luck to you and your family and would not like to be in your shoes but it will sort its self out in the end....

Phirefly

lkmc01 wrote: »

but felt negelted as my son came when he did.

by this do you mean you felt neglected by the state?

lkmc01

yes sorry I meant neglected. Trying to get my thoughts on screen too fast.

jackieb

I had a baby when I was 16. I shared a room with my baby and my sister, until I left home 2 and a half years later with my now husband. It can be done and hasn't done us any harm. I got married when I was 18 and my husband was 20. It may be tough at times but it can work out. We started off in a privately rented flat, and then got a council house. My husband had always worked but didn't have a trade. He got a place on a YOP scheme (showing my age here ) and now earns a pretty decent wage.

I just want you to know that it's not all doom and gloom. With hindsight and in a perfect world, waiting would have been best. But what's done is done and you just have to make the best of it. It can be done.

Wishing you and your family all the best. x

Phirefly

lkmc01 wrote: »

yes sorry I meant neglected. Trying to get my thoughts on screen too fast.

Sorry, I wasn't picking up on your spelling, its a pet hate of mine when people do that! I was just wondering how you felt neglected - by the state? Your parents?

lkmc01

the state, definatly not my parents.

I thought the dressing room thing was very petty when it could definatly not be used as a bedroom and our clothes (not like we had many though) could not fit in our bedroom and so had to go in there.

zoelouise88

carlislelass wrote: »

why should youngsters get pregnant and then expect the council to house them?

its not just youngsters who expect this, i fell pregnant and it was unplanned yes but there was no way on earth i was going to abort my child or live on the streets with him, so i went to the council for advice and they housed me i didnt expect anything at first just advice but they have a duty to house any pregnant women or girl no matter what the age.

lkmc01

we had to pay full council tax too

Bungarm2001

Haven't read all this thread, but got the gist of it. How different it is today compared with whn I foud myself pregnant at 16. In those days, you were rushed into marriage whether you liked it or not, and whether you had anywhere to live or not. (we didn't have anywhere...I was still at school) We started life off together in my inlaws front room..in a council owned property that was due to be pulled down. Imagine the state it was in.

In those days too it was very very difficult to find accomodation of any sort, and the council certainly weren't giving out anything unless you'd been on the waiting list for yonks. There was no such thing as bxb or temporary housing. After a while we moved into my mum's temporarily as my inlaws was very crowded (note: first myth: you don't automatically get rehoused because of crowding, even if the house is council owned and you've broken all the crowding rules. All my in-laws got was a letter threatening them with eviction if they didn't reduce the number living there...13 people living in the house) and to cut a long story short, we eventually were given a place to live (downstairs flat) by an old friend of my Dads who was an agent.

The flat was barely habitable and if it were around today, I think it would have been condemned outright by H&S. We had mushrooms growing in one room, ceiling down in another, old gas heater for hot water that we found out later was giving off dangerous fumes...anyway...all bad memories, but while living there, I kind of vowed and declared to myself that if I ever found myself in a position to provide safe and secure housing for people who were in our position, then I would.

Here I am today many years later doing exactly that, so, when I look back, I wouldn't want anyone as young as I was to go thru what I did, but at the same time, I doubt that if life had been any softer I would be where I am today, in a position to help others.

Good luck to you and your family. I hope it all works out for you, but always remember, don't rely too much on other people or the myths and yarns they spin you.