Marriage over don't know where to start

Skint_Lynne

bank_of_slate wrote: »

Because they are easy!
...Linda xx

:rotfl: :rotfl: :rotfl: :rotfl: :rotfl: :rotfl:

But they are also skanky, and probably move onto the next mug when they are bored!!

SL x

Skint_Lynne

Hi Kizzy,

I'm glad you had a nice afternoon. OH was probably embarassed to see your friends now that everything was out in the open, a wee bit of embarassement will do him the world of good, it confirms that he knows he has done wrong.

Sorry about the wee ones, I hope they settle down soon,

SL x

kizzykizzywizzy

Kids are fine now thanks, it doesn't hurt him to see them like that ( well actually it does )
I'm not as positive today as I was yesterday & now feeling very lonely.
Said to my Sister about going out with him today & yesterday & tomorrow, I don't think she's too impressed with me, I think she thinks I should give up, as he loves the other woman & she tried with her husband for 2 years & he WANTED to be with her!
I said to my Sister I love him & I can forgive & forget, I didn't say anything at all about what he's done, nothing & that's only after a couple of days, she said she was making snide remarks a year later! So she thinks I'm doing well in that dept.
He's just text me to see if DS is Ok & about coming around tomorrow & said any problems give me a ring.
Will text him back & I expect that will be it until we see him tomorrow
God I really love him

Juneno

Hi Folks,
I've been reading this thread today and have gone through every emotion with every message!
I'm glad you're starting to come through the tunnel a bit more Kizzy,SFH, Gertrudeanna - well done and keep going, you know you're strong.
Men can be such ba'bags as we say here in Scotland (SFH will know that one!) It's pretty obvious that their brains are definitely not in their heads.

Kizzy - just a thought, don't mean to offend but if you really are wanting to try again and say you can forgive and forget, then try not to put in any 'smart' comments like the cheating one. He's going to believe more that you can forgive him if you raise yourself above such opportunities! (although it's sooo tempting!)

From a revenge point of view, here's a funny one! A friend of mine, who's boyfriend was cheating, rubbed the crotch of his pants with the inside of red chillis. Just let's say it was a few days before he felt he could do anything other than pass water with it! Of course, he didn't know what she's done so he went to the doc 'cos he thought he may have an sti!! Strangely, his moose didn't last long after that!:D
Just a thought girls, if you have access to chillis and the underwear drawer!!

I hope everything turns out for the best for you girls. Remember, it's always darkest before dawn.
Best wishes,
June x

GirlRacer_2

Skint_Lynne wrote: »

Girl Racer,

Would you say your ex man looks 20 years older than you now so that he matches his 'lady love'? I've read some of your posts before and you indicate that she wasn't blessed in the looks department. I wonder why they leave decent girls for these horrors, it is beyond me.

SL x

Ex has always looked older than me, even when we were both 18. I'm a very young looking 37 and he's a very old looking 37. The new woman has got a real issue with me. Even after all these years she still gives me the look whenever she seems me. Ex carried on very early on in our marriage and even though I was full of good intentions about forgetting it and giving him a second chance, every time he was late home from work or if the phone rang and there was nobody there it sent my mind racing and I tortured myself for a long time. When he carried on the second time I was under no illusion that I could be happy with him again. Despite being petrified at the time of becoming a single parent I couldn't be happier now.

The woman he left me for (well he didn't leave me, I threw him out. I think he'd still be here if I hadn't done that. But he probably still would have been carrying on) was absolutely mortifying to look at. A friend of mine commented that he wouldn't take her rabbiting!!!! I know that looks aren't everything but my god, I was so insulted.

Ex reckons he carried on with somebody older because he couldn't cope with family life i.e. responsibility of having children. Her children were off her hands and she was free to party every night. Only trouble now is that her children and grand-children have moved in with her and ex hubby so he's now lumbered with sleepless nights and looking after grandchildren. Who said there wasn't a god!!!!!

kizzykizzywizzy

Juneno
I haven't made any comments at all to him today & yesterday was only a day after I found out for sure what was going on.
I think that it is a major thing & I mustn't do it & I wont.
Also though I mustn't dance to his tune, like today we were going to do something after country park, but as we couldn't think of anything straight away, so I said oh let's not bother I'll drop you off, so took that decision myself.

OberonSH

Gotta love that Karma......

Kiz love, you'te not lonely - you have tonnes of mates, and a great life. Debt free, 2 great kids, and the sense to see that you can't switch your heart off, even if he is a donkey.

You're doing really well, and we're all proud of you. Just take it steady. and remember to build your new life yourself. If he's included then all well and good, but don't put yourself under too much pressure. Like I said in my PM, you have the rest of your life to work on things if that's the way it goes - no point rushing things. Especially as he's still under the impression he loves the moose-toad. Even if she does look like a horse in a woman costume....

Keeping_Motivated

Hi Kizzy I'm glad you had a nice afternoon. Good for you taking him home rather than clinging to anything just to be with him, it shows you're being honest and dignified but not desperate.

Please do try and build a life for you too, coz even if you stay together I am sure he will find that attractive in you and will empower you too.

Of course you feel lonely its all so new and he is so near yet so far so allow yourself to understand your sadness and go with it.

Your sister is feeling understandably protective of you and sometimes its just as hard to watch someones suffering as it going through it yourself.

Keep talking to us, family, friends and expressing like you are coz bottling it up would be worse.

KM x

MissShoes

Kizzy you are amazing! I've just spent a couple of hours reading your thread- what you've gone through is huge and the way you've dealt with it is selfless and inspiring- your kids are so lucky to have a Mum like you! You have inspired me to re-post on my thread!

Keep your chin up and good luck xxx

elantan

GirlRacer wrote: »

Ex reckons he carried on with somebody older because he couldn't cope with family life i.e. responsibility of having children. Her children were off her hands and she was free to party every night. Only trouble now is that her children and grand-children have moved in with her and ex hubby so he's now lumbered with sleepless nights and looking after grandchildren. Who said there wasn't a god!!!!!

isnt Karma great