Marriage over don't know where to start

Homegrown_Idiot

GeorgeUK wrote: »

HGI - i'll have to look at some of your posts, but just wondered how your wife could take out a joint loan without your signature? Did the police get involved?

Sorry - i know that's prying. Just bewildered by what some "loved ones" can do.

That's okay you're not prying. The loan was my fault really, we'd got all the paperwork sent to us the day before I was deployed and I signed where my signature was required, but when I was away she managed to get the amount upped. Unfortunately because I hadn't dated it, just signed and left the date blank, I was told I couldn't prove anything.

Kizzy - sorry if I've hijacked this thread!

scottishfreebiehunter

Good to know you are getting on homegrown:T

My ds just told me sick of takeaways shopping tomorrow,feel so pathetic

kimlisa66

bank_of_slate wrote: »

take it out, shred it, put it back in the envelope and give it to him
...Linda xx

Or return to sender, not known at this address.

The first thing my Ex did was make sure his mobile was re-registered to his new address(lives with his aunt) as that was the hard evidence he was having an affair (1000 texts in two weeks to best mate's wife)

The day he moved, I transferred my wages to my own bank account, but luckily he was still paying into our overdrawn joint account. At any point he could have withdrawn my money as well so I made sure he couldnt. I let him pay all the direct debits, mortgage, and I did a load of xmas shopping for the kids out of it as well.

It might seem a bit stupid to get us into more debt but I knew that I had my wages in my account for three months as an emergency fund, thats how long it took him to realise I wasnt paying in to it ....I was stupid enough not to check months before we were already overdrawn due to his gambling and drinking.... Have some of that !!!

He eventually put the overdraft onto an interest free credit card and ive offered to pay some of it monthly, as and when I can afford it.

Hope you are OK Kizzy, thinking of you

Kim x

scottishfreebiehunter

Kizzy hope you are getting on okay (()) xxxx

Buffythedebtslayer

I am with GeorgeUK here -very glad to be single!

Homegrown - what a load of stuff to come through. wow. My last ex boyfriend had an evil c*w of an ex (hence treating me like crap apparently still made him a d***head mind you) and I really thought she was a one off apparently not - it seems you married her sister.

Its funny how some days I would give anything to have partner, and simply cannot imagine betraying some one I loved or even if I didn't love them any more being so cruel as to do some of things on here. I mean leaving an injured man! !!!!!!?

and I cannot understand how some men treat their children(anyone want their faith restored in "part time" Dads should read Chip Hazard's diary, he is lovely)

human beings are very confusing.

xx

kizzykizzywizzy

Hello everyone
Sorry I haven't been about, here goes, he arrived about 1pm, said you don't have to cook for me! I said I'm not, DD wanted a roast & as they've been eating rubbish for days I've made an effort to do it, you can have some if you like, but I expect you'll say no, just to be awquard. He said, no I'd love to have dinner with you all. He then went straight upstairs to tidy up with the kids:D
I finished off the dinner & we all sat & ate it, all was well, he finished of the bedrooms, hoovered & dusted them & hoovered the hallway etc :T whilst I got washing in & put some more out loaded dishwasher etc, then DD wanted to play trumps, as they were playing, she said Daddy you cheated, to which I quipped, yes he did! he huffed & stopped playing at which point DD repeated daddy's a cheat daddy's a cheat ( meaning trumps! ) I also said ( why can't I bite my tongue ) you do not know how many people you've affected, you've upset me the kids, your mum & dad, you've lied to your sister, he said don't you think I know what a lowlife I am, I'll probably end up living like a vagrant because of what I've done. It just happened, I said oh yes you just happened to drop your trousers etc - won't go into detail - this was a low point, though we did go into a different room to have this row!
Then DD & DS wanted to go to the park, he said I'll take you, then DD said I want mummy to come too, so we went to adventure playground, saw a friend & filled her in on things whilst he pushed them on rope swing etc, she was great, gave me a boost whilst there & was much happier after, we went to the "normal" park next door too & being that I'm an idiot I was doing the monkey bars & playing on the swing, at which point husband started making my swing go sideways, we had a great time.
I thought he'd be going home after that, but he did the kids dinner & said do you want something, as I poured a glass of wine, he knows I don't drink without nibbles, I said no I'll just eat a few pringles! he said do you mind if I have something & got himself a some bits & bobs.
I then knocked over my wine:mad: so had to clear that up!
He stayed until 8pm, & put the kids to bed, for what it's worth, they're still awake now!
He said about going out tomorrow afternoon, no idea where, can anyone think of anything?? Kids have suggested swimming or crabbing!
Also, he text me to say there's a thai festival sunday, do you want to go?
Which I said yes that'll be fun.
I'm sure he's just doing this to see the kids, but still hoping, & I might as well go as I'll only be stuck on my own with them.
When he went tonight, I felt really sad, I just feel so much happier with him here.
I rang my Dad & spoke to him for over an hour, he's been to the Doctors at last & seems ok:T , he's so mad with husband, as he's always liked him & never thought it of him. I said to my Dad, if he'd have me I'd try again & he said if my mum had ever done anything like this ( she never did ) he would've too he understands how much I love him.
So that's about it, as usual had a nice time with him apart from the small "moment" & kids were fine when he went, no crying:D
Sorry this is so long, also no-one worry at all about hijacking, it's not hijaking it's telling your situation, so that others can use your experiences to help them

scottishfreebiehunter

Sounds like you had a good dayxxxxxxx:T:T hope it works out the way you want
thinking of you.

Well mine not been going to good,my so called dh was all nice about money etc until my ds called his mobile tonight and he was in company basically then switched it off
no idea what to do next as do not want ds getting upset,he even asked him daddy why are you like this in front of people

Keeping_Motivated

Hi Kizzy thanks for letting us know how you are, I've been wondering how you are.

Sounds like he wants to be around you ALL or he would be saying can I take the children. Although I don't want to get your hopes up in case its the wrong impression.

You are keeping your dignity so well, despite the row, and you should be very proud of yourself and your strength.

As for what you can do tomorrow, why don't you go swimming as your DD suggested as you have lost weight and will be able to show off your body and maybe show him what he is missing/giving up

Keeping_Motivated

scottishfreebiehunter wrote: »

Sounds like you had a good dayxxxxxxx:T:T hope it works out the way you want
thinking of you.

Well mine not been going to good,my so called dh was all nice about money etc until my ds called his mobile tonight and he was in company basically then switched it off
no idea what to do next as do not want ds getting upset,he even asked him daddy why are you like this in front of people

Awe I'm sorry he is being so cruel to you both. It seems so selfish to cheat AND then rub your nose in it. Easier said than done but could you go and do something 'normal' with your son tomorrow and just 'try' and forget for a few hours and give you both a break. Also maybe you and your son need to make a pact not to contact the ex for a while and go quiet and let him do the contacting?

I wish you luck and hope you and your son get some peace from the pain of this soon.

Take care
KM x

kizzykizzywizzy

Sorry things are still bad SFH - he's a complete knob!

I don't mind going swimming, but swimming pool around here is freezing, & he saw my body for a week in Italy ( with fake bake ) & didn't seem to notice:rolleyes: I think I'm the only person who's been on holiday & come back whiter than they were when they went:rotfl: