Marriage over don't know where to start

adelegalla

Not a crap mother, a very good mother. Have you tried simple things to get info, like googling her name? That can bring surprising results. Can someone look after the kids for a day/night? Think you need a bit of you time to get your head together and assess everything. Just one night.

supersavershal

Hi Kizzy, I am so sorry to hear your news but I can honestly say this doesnt surprise me.His behaviour all along implied he was hiding something.I think you have done the right thing with the bank and building society accounts for one thing you dont want him spending your money on her.
I think you need to speak to your husband about this, if he wants to be with her why didnt he tell you about her straight away.Why did he go on the holiday with you.He may well be regreting his affair and that is why he has been so cruel to you, saying nasty things because it was his guilt at hurting you and breaking the family up.You shouldnt phone her but I would certainly let her know in some way about him sleeping with you, why would he do that if he wants her.
He might have been lonely and depressed on the ship and the worlds a different place on dry land, he probably regrets it but men cant say that they just take it out on the people closest to them, which in this case is you.
You have the upper hand and the history with him, be strong and dignified and think every decision out at least overnight, sleep on things and ensure it is what you want.
Im not saying forgive him, but has he said to you that he wants to leave you to live with her? He may think he has no choice but to go because his infidelity means the marriage is over.That may be so but make sure that it is your decision and that you threw him out of your marriage once you had all the facts and knew how he felt.
Im a woman for revenge, if he comes round begging you to stay and saying she means nothing and is a mistake I would record it on your mobile and send it to her.Being on a ship is not real life and their liason probably wouldnt survive a week with financial issues such as csa payments and contact with children and a bitter ex wife, these are things she has yet to deal with.
If you want to save your marriage I wish you all the best

supersavershal

Have you facebooked her honey?

elona

Have you tried "Friends Reunited?"

Bagpuss741

I've just got them a Mcdonalds! crap mother

Don't ever let those words come out of you mouth again!! You are not a crap mother, You are the mother who has looked after your children while your husband was away and the mother who fought to save her marriage. I would be very proud to have a mother as strong as you:A

Isabelle

Hi Kizzy
Just spent a couple of hours caching up on your story. Just wanted to say I'm sorry he's put you through this. Been there, it makes you feel a mixture of angry, stupid (for not trusting your instincts) and sad. It does get better and focussing on the children helps a lot!
Actually, DH and I are still together despite a very rocky patch a few years ago, we've had to work hard at it. In our case, we got very close to separating but decided to give it another go and it worked. I'm not suggesting you do this, it was the right thing to do for us though.
Keep strong and do make the most of your existing relationships (family, friends, children, colleagues).
Good luck, I will keep reading.
Did you ever hear back from CAB? my friend in the same situation as yours found them helpful but she ended up having to go into their offices to talk to them.
Lots of hugs.
Isabelle

scottishfreebiehunter

right people i got on train earlier to go down to where the b i t c h lives got to glasgow and something made me stop not fear or anything just no idea

I am gutted tired same as kizzy feeding son on what I can though trying my best to care for himxxxxxxx

mumoftwins

scottishfreebiehunter wrote: »

right people i got on train earlier to go down to where the b i t c h lives got to glasgow and something made me stop not fear or anything just no idea

I am gutted tired same as kizzy feeding son on what I can though trying my best to care for himxxxxxxx

Is this the b i t c h that split your marriage up SFH?

Pinkylouloubell

Have you heard from him today Kizzy??

scottishfreebiehunter

mumoftwins wrote: »

Is this the b i t c h that split your marriage up SFH?

:oyes


I know it takes two but I want to hurt them so bad,I aint a bad person and sorry If I am coming across that way but feel so down