Marriage over don't know where to start

dinkytwostep

Sorry SFH - didn't realise my earlier post had posted..(if you see what I mean). Have been having pc problems.

Chip_Hazard

scottishfreebiehunter wrote: »

And if Robster sounds deranged god help what I or others day.
Maybe time for me to put this to rest on here as some are not understanding of feelings etc

I assume that might be a veiled reference to me, SFH.

I, like everyone else on here, have your best interests at heart. I just think you need to calm down a bit and not get so het up over everything otherwise you're going to explode one day and do something you regret. You have to try to remain calm and assured, especially in front of your DS, as this is all affecting him as you know all too well.

As for not being understanding of feelings, I hope that isn't aimed at me. I can only post what I consider relative, realistic advice because I've gone through this and am out the other side now. I've seen my kids cling on for dear life to my hand when I've taken them back because my ex is going out with a scumbag who hit my kids, threated them by saying "If you don't shut up, I'll f***ing hit your f***ing bum"; a man who drove my kids 75 miles away on holiday when he was banned from driving; driven them while p***ed; I've taken DS3 to hopsital where this man had hit his head on a doorframe; who'd goaded me in front of them about the fact he was going out with my ex and I was a s**t dad etc etc.

Please don't ever say I don't understand people's feelings about their exes. I gave up a lot to move up here from my home town, losing contact with friends and family and the like all for a relationship with a serial cheat, a liar and a woman who can't live life without the emotional crutch of a relationship. It's remembering how I got through this torrid time that has made me who I am today.

Juneno

kizzykizzywizzy wrote: »

Gert I'm the same, want him - don't want him

It's never ever going to happen now, maybe he might want me back a few months down the line when he's been dumped by the moose & he's broke & unhappy, but by then I'll have moved on.
I wish I could just get the ball rolling on the divorce, I might see when I go for the free consultation, whether she can get things moving, so it's all guns blazing on 1st October

GOOD GIRL!!!:T :T :T

Well done - you're right, you won't want him back even if he gives you the opportunity now.
He'll likely break up with the moose anyway - after all, they haven't lived a normal humdrum life together yet, have they?

So glad you're doing so much better - and all the other too.

Tes - don't stop posting - your advice is always thought provoking and sometimes refreshingly blunt.:D

June x

Rikki

dellybelly wrote: »

Kizzy - I've been given some advice about divorce etc and it's quite sound.... don't do it.

If you're currently on benefits, you'll get legal aid and he'll not have to pay anything. As you have grounds for divorce (his infidelity) it will go through a lot quicker. If he has to divorce you, he has to pay all the legal costs

If you make him sue you for divorce he has to wait 5 years as he has no grounds.... why hand him to the moose on a plate?

Gert - really tired this morning. Kept meaning to have an early night all week and still haven't made it to bed before 12. I'm really tired and can't decide if it's totm or if it's just stress.

Am dropping DS off with the ex this morning and am debating whether to go into town and finish getting his uniform for nursery or if I should just come home and go to bed for a couple of hours.

Kizzy will get legal aid and he will have to pay his own solicitor. Regardless of who files for divorce and where one party has legal aid the court will not order the other to cover the petitioner/respondents costs.

Edit: Adultery is harder to get as grounds of divorce and takes longer unless they are prepared to admit it and sign accordingly.

gerturdeanna

I sent SSS another text this morning saying : hope u understand why i'm being distant, i think i woke up and smelt the coffee afer sat, when after all we've been through, u still can't/won't commit to me/us.so for self protection,i'm drawing away on all levels, maybe one day u'll wake up and smell the coffee?!? might be 2 late then?!?!

Plai and simple enough for SSS to understand!!

I'm starting a new thread: will post link in a mo

gerturdeanna

Ok guys - we have now moved home and are now here: http://forums.moneysavingexpert.com/showthread.html?p=14280093#post14280093

Dumbledore55

What happened to the new thread? It seems to have disappeared.

gerturdeanna

I have no idea!! If anyone finds it can you let us know?!?!

beanielou

Seems like its been p0ulled for some reason?

GeorgeUK

Looks like it must have been deleted???
I've not got anything in my subscribed threads now!!