Marriage over don't know where to start

kizzykizzywizzy

Jules I've just ot in from one of the shitiesy nights out ever i was so bored & didn't want to be there, got home DFS didn't even ask if I had a nice time, & went straight away. I'm so miserable I hate everything about my life & then I read about how well u r coping - it makes me feel so crap, as you are doing so well.
I wish I could just go to the vets & be put out of my misery

kizzykizzywizzy

Going to bed alone - like some sad old woman.
Whatever did I do to deserve this

ZoeGirl_3

kizzykizzywizzy wrote: »

Going to bed alone - like some sad old woman.
Whatever did I do to deserve this

((((((((((((((HUGS)))))))))))))))) :grouphug:

It's not something you did, you can't control everyone in your life and sometimes people let you down and you feel like sh*t, and I think it is okay to feel that way. To wallow in it at times.

I broke up with my son's dad (he just wanted to break up, not real reason, just he was sick of being in a relationship, no others involved etc) and for a while I couldn't eat or do anything, and then I had to get on with it, move, keep working, looking after my son etc.

And after this initial reaction, I felt better. I still cried sometimes, and missed us (god knows why) but it was better.

Then about a year later I almost had a mini breakdown, I just felt so terrible, and I read some really cool advice online which was to have a safe place, I choose my bed lol , where you just went whenever you needed to and for however long you needed to to cope. After a while I didn't need it anymore, and I am really okay these days.

I think breakups hit everyone differently and the hardest part for me personally was not knowing why it had happened. It seemed like such a shock. It makes you mistrust and doubt yourself, and feel :mad: at them.

People also take different amounts of time to get over them, so if it seems to be taking a while, that sucks, but as long as you are getting the support you need and taking care of yourself, then know that while it may not feel like it you will feel better slowely (even if you hate people saying that lol).

Sorry to go on... Hope you are feeling better later after a good sleep xxxx

PS: Feel free to PM whenever with emails full of ranting, god knows I did it to people in my time lol. And it DID make me feel better.

ZoeGirl_3

Was just thinking about this some more, and thought I would post a quote from some song lyrics because I did (and have to admit would still) really enjoy playing this song REALLY LOUD and screaming along with it for a while there, epecially the parts in red. Just imagine me in my PJs jumping around my bed holding my hair brush for a microphone lol:

"Well, I never saw it coming.
I should've started running
A long, long time ago.
And I never thought I'd doubt you,
I'm better off without you
More than you, more than you know.
I'm slowly getting closure.
I guess it's really over.
I'm finally getting better.
And now I'm picking up the pieces.
I'm spending all of these years
Putting my heart back together.
'Cause the day I thought I'd never get through,
I got over you."

I don't want to post the whole song because of copyright but if anyone wants to hear it try youtube.com or google the song it is Over You - By Chris Daughtry.

chevalier

never alone kizzy never alone, there is ALWAYS someone online

hugs
chev

dellybelly_2

wrote a really long message but lost it, grrr.

Jules - you do what is right for you and ignore your SIL, after all, she's looking after your OH's best interests and not yours.

Kizzy - sorry you had a bad night, hopefully the next one will be better.

zoe - really loved the song, just the right amount of anger in the music too. Go find it on youtube guys, you'll like it.

bad day yesterday, the house is really empty without my wee dog. Not expecting too good a day today either, we would have been married 7 years today.

DS is now giving off to me "no puters, no games mammy" so I guess I'd better go.

Check in again later.

kizzykizzywizzy

Morning
Well what a boring night out, I feel worse than I did before I went!
DFS took kids out on thier bikes, I got ready he asked if i wanted anything to eat didn't bother as had a sandwich mid afternoon, I said help yourself to food, hadn't made anything, he did the kids dinner.
When I came downstairs he said to DD mummy looks nice doesn't she? & then he said you smell nice too! ( hehe Marc Jacobs Daisy - I treated myself to )
Friend picked me up went to boring bar almost empty & so much for a pub crawl, was stuck in there from 8.30 til gone 11pm! we then went to nightclub, £8 to get in! same place I went before, but they went to the trendy bit & not the bit I like with all the 80's & 90's stuff, & then they stood & talked, I stayed about 20 mins & went home. Obviously came in pretending I'd had fun! DFS had had a kebab whilst here, stunk the house out. Then he said I'm off then, bye & said it's cold out here I said bye & that was it, then I came upstairs & couldn't find the thread, felt totally peed off & sad, I'm just not going to rely on someone else to make me happy.
Bit fed up as he didn't do DD homework with her, so I will have to do that tonight, in fairness he doesn't have a huge amount of time to do everything in.

kizzykizzywizzy

DB - big hugs to you on what would have been your anniversary, don't even want to think about that one!

scottishfreebiehunter

sorry you didnt have a good night xxxxxx
will call later as in bed with laptop feeling sorry for myself again lol

was the club no good or was it the company?

kizzykizzywizzy

The bar we went to was really dull, I didn't know anyone except 1 friend, a couple of them were ok, but they were old work friends & I had nothing in common with any of them, they were talking about thier old workplace ( had all been made redundant ) nothing about the place was good, hardly anyone in there, crap music & was in there for nearly 3 hours! By the time we got to club, I just thought - what the hell am i doing ? I don't want to be here, would've stayed had they gone to the fun bit, but they then stood in the crap bit talking again! I wanted to have a dance! So i just said i'm going, I probably looked really boring, but I just didn't enjoy myself at all.
Then got home & realised that I don't want to go out just to look like I'm having fun, it's not me & not what I want to do. Hope the Salsa dancing next Sunday isn't a flop too, of that will put me off going out again for life!