Marriage over don't know where to start

MarieC5575

I'm new to this site and have only been on here complaining about my mortgage. After reading what some of you are experiencing at the moment it has put my worries into perspective.

As someone who has been through a break up I can totally sympathise. Luckily enough, I was younger and had no kids at the time so I was able to cut him out of my life completely and slowly I started to get back to my old self.

Kizzy - I haven't had time to read the full story but from your recent posts I can only tell you that you are just going through what everyone with a broken heart does. The need to talk to someone you thought of as your best friend is only natural and most people do. Try to remember though that this person is no longer your best friend. Anyone who decides to cheat has no real feelings for the other person. As for taking him back, in my opinion it's just not worth it. This is exactly what I did and it only prolonged the pain. After a separation of a few weeks, my ex phoned begging for another chance and promised he had made a mistake and couldn't bear to be without me. Turned out that his "bit on the side" had decided to give it another go with her partner. A couple of weeks later (after I had almost worried myself into the ground everytime he went out etc) he left me again to be with her.

What I'm trying to say is that there's no point being with someone who doesn't want to be with you. So no matter how much your heart is breaking don't sacrifice your own happyness because even if he did come back I can guarantee that you'd never be truly happy. When you are tempted to phone him ask yourself what kind of a person, thinks so little of his wife and family that he would cheat on them and then deny it. Hurting someone is never easy but it takes a real coward to cheat.

As for being a bad mum, give yourself a break. You're only human and the fact that you are getting out of bed every morning to look after them proves what a good mum you are.

I totally agree with the post that said that you should see a doctor. There's no remedy for a broken heart but there might just be something that will lighten the load a little until nature does the rest. Stay positive though, you will come out on the other side, it just takes time.

gerturdeanna

Re the tarot reading - it has given me strength and for that I am grateful but I do also realise that it is just a tarot reading and I can't live my life by the cards or whatever. But I do think, I know have to be strong for me and the kids and make him work for us. If he doesn't work, then he's lost me. I'm not prepared to spend my time and effort on 'flogging a dead horse'. If he wants me,so be it. If he doesn't again, so be it. I do love him still, but I think I've realised now that he is not the be all and end all in my life!! My kids and I are!!

Rikki

Stand by your bed ladies I am back.

I hope you all survived the weekend and didn't have too many upsets. Stood firm on your beliefs and didn't let the barstward grind you down.

Be strong for the children and remember they are living with you so you dictate the terms.

julie2710

Thanks guys!! I know I shouldn't waste my time on feeling bad for him. He took son to the shops then came back and had him in tears again! He left him sat on the toilet crying just because he kept asking for me - I tried really hard not to go in there and but in as he would accuse me of being controlling, but I couldn't believe he just left him there:mad: :mad:
He's been crabby ever since he got here!! My poor little boy hadn't had breakfast - we always read a few books in bed before we get up and have breakfast so that was when he interupted us!
Making a big start on sorting my finances out today - got some shares I'm cashing in to pay of c/card - the lump sum will be better than the 100 quid a year!!!
Don't feel bad about letting the cat out of the bag Kizzy - the only thing you did wrong was to marry a cheating moron - but you just didn't realise it at the time!
Good on you Gert - get strength from anywhere!:T

scottishfreebiehunter

ds very run down doc said,chest infection(hence wheezing with asthma)
Mouth full of ulcers very run down,lost weight and all in all needs to get out of here soon and away to recover and cannot believe how ill he looked.
This is what has happened since his dad walked out and taken it bad,anyway has antibiotics told to rest and eat properly.
I have had it today big time,oh and guess what the t o s s e r still not here yet:rolleyes:
When he does come I am taking OUR car going to shops and then coming home and going for bath etc and he can look after him for few hours USELESS USELESS MAN

Sorry people really upset todayxx

scottishfreebiehunter

meant to say hope youre sis better soonxx

scottishfreebiehunter

sfh the doctor has some cefelexin in house and feels run down and sore ears etc so self prescribing it to herself knows this is wrong:rolleyes::rotfl:but do not care:D

julie2710

SFH - that man really is a !!!!!!!!!! He might not care what effect he is having on you but he should at least give a damn about what he's doing to his son:mad: :mad:
To be honest if he can't be bothered turning up on time he's just showing even more disrespect to the pair of you - it's almost tempting to not be there when he does turn up and to just leave a note on the door saying "too late!!!"
Your main priority for now is looking after DS and yourself. Lots of pampering and snuggly days and nights for the pair of you!!!
I'm counting the days now til you go to Oz - it will do you both the world of good to get away and enjoy yourselves - I would say no contact at all while you're there otherwise the idiot will only sabotage your enjoyment there too!

trancebabe

Good advice from Jules!!!

SFH - when my DD got a bit run down and wouldn't eat, I gave her some Complan milkshake. It gave her a meal in a milkshake and she perked up quite quickly!

Blended the vanilla one with some fruit and ice cream to make it taste good. she had a couple a day for about 3 days.

Obviously your DS would need to quite like milshake though! Poor lil fella!!! It's so hard on them :'0(

scottishfreebiehunter

The t w a t is here acting like a hard man and he is ready to be asked to leave as I aint putting up with it

:mad::mad::mad: