Marriage over don't know where to start

Fidget21

he doesn't like it when she is begging him back and 'going round in circles' and doesn't like when she leaves him alone and trys to move on!

I disagree with KM (for once!). I think he does like it when Kizzy is begging him to come back because it makes hime feel big. It makes her the weak one (sorry Kizz) and he can then use that to be vile towards her.

I think he really doesn't like her getting a life without him, because it shows him how weak he is, and what he has lost. I don't think he can handle the fact that Kizzy can live without him and might be moving on to better, while he is left with nothing (not even the moose - because I think he is the one dangling on a thread for her...how sad is that?!?!).

The funniest thing is, while he is showing his true colours like this, he is just making it easier for you Kizzy.

Anyways, glad you had a good night out...keep it up girl!

boddy

Kizzy, gert and SFH and everyone going through the same thing. I have been following this thread for ages. I check to see how you are all doing. Only posted once before.

Just want to say that it may be worth keeping a diary with times dates etc of any incidents. Cos you never know you may need this info at a later date. Same goes for abusive txt messages or phone calls. Keep them.

Wishing you all the very best and I know you will get there in the end.

lotties_mum

(julie 2710) just seen the facebook picture, she looks like Alice off the vicar of dibley) but even drippier!!!

kizzykizzywizzy

I have got BIG problems though in that his Sister has now told him he has to go & his mum & dad don't want him there - so he has nowhere to live cheaply. This means he won't be able to afford to pay the mortgage.

kizzykizzywizzy

Yes Boddy, the abuse I've had is verbal, no texts or anything, & usually no witnesses.
I don't think I have said before as I knew everyone would say don't take him back, when I really wanted to at first, but on holiday in front of the kids he kicked a suitcase so hard into my leg I had a massive bruise, which lasted well over a week. I was told it was my fault because i'd wound him up!
That's why yesterday scared me so much

lotties_mum

Could you persuade sil to let him stay until the new mortgage kicks in,by then you will have had your solicitors appointment and hopefully is forms back, so you will have a clearer picture.

kizzykizzywizzy

I shall tell him he'll have to do it, I think she's really fed up with him being there. I think he should ask his Mum, it's his Dad that's more against him staying, he's mummys boy, so she'd probably talk his dad around.
He said the other day after I said FIL didn't want him there, I won't ask now then, I said your Mum probably doesn't mind & he said NO I'm not asking!
As I've said so many times before he is very stubborn, & really digs his heels in, but I think on this occasion he'll just have to get on & ask, even if it's just temporary until he gets a second job

lotties_mum

Kizzy, the suitcase incident is domestic abuse I know its too late now but it is a pity you didn't take a photo of your bruise. Has he been like this before all this happened? You're soo better off without him. Even if you were thinking of letting him move back in DON'T. and you have grounds not to especially after yesterday for future reference Kizzy. womens aid helpline 0800 200 0247. They can give you advice as what to do.

bandraoi

Kizzy, if I were you I'd start to keep a diary. Keep it factual, but write down when he sees them, what they do together, what you say to each other and how he acts.

Just the basic functionalities of the two of you negotiating your new relationship, but something that will serve as a memory aid if you need to defend yourself in court or whatnot.

kizzykizzywizzy

I did take photos, but one just shows the 2 scratches, I've gone through all the holiday photos & it doesn't show up on any of them, the 2 I took on my mobile phone have come out a lot better.
He kicked me years ago, when i was sat on the floor, not hard & pulled my hair once. He does "lose it" & usually curls his arms around tightening all his muscles up like the Hulk. I've often called him that!