Marriage over don't know where to start

kassytbag

i just want to shake him - i have just about reached the end of my tether - i need to unplug all phones etc and throw away my mobile just in case - im going to head for bed and try to get some sleep - thanks for all the support
xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx

scottishfreebiehunter

We will get our sweet revenge one day ladies when they are not probably not in these relationships no more and they are sat there thinking what have they done and by this point we will have moved forward in life
sat here with glass of wine and jack daniels and a cup of fennel tea:rotfl:

Kizzy no please do not put yourself through this as all rubbish as mine said that and then keeps changing mind it is them trying to put blame elsewhere etcxxxxxxxx

Keeping_Motivated

Night Kassy. I agree with Belfastgirl try not to tell him your knowledge or you are giving him amunition, play the long game if you can.

Sleep well x

kizzykizzywizzy

Night Kassy
Glad you've joined us, we'll get through this together - sleep well

kizzykizzywizzy

SFH - I just didn't enjoy myself at all going out with the kids by myself.
I missed him, just like I'm missing him now, tears are coming all to easily tonight

Mind you I did say to him at the end of our tel call as DD in my bed AGAIN tonight, " That'll be good if I pull, DD is always in my bed!" he didn't say anything.
By the way not looking to pull & I expect she'll be 18 by the time I trust anyone enough to sleep with them!

scottishfreebiehunter

kizzykizzywizzy wrote: »

SFH - I just didn't enjoy myself at all going out with the kids by myself.
I missed him, just like I'm missing him now, tears are coming all to easily tonight

I just do not get how on earth they can move on so easily ,especially when they all have young families ,really angers me.
I find it very hard at night to.
Like we said on phone other night ,couple you see walking in street look so happy and that used to be us.
I am angry tonight K and really want to go down there as they have hurt myself and son badly
Though my little boy said mummy thank you for today so going to shut up for now for him

kizzykizzywizzy

How sweet, I'm glad you had a nice day together.

I just get so lonely without adult company, it's probably that I miss, rather than him?
It just seems so stupid, he's sat somewhere bored & so am I, that's why I don't mind being together, also habit as well I suppose.
I just think the cruel way he let me believe he still loved me & let me book the holiday & even talked about going on other holidays.
Sat in the garden saying about getting a fence put up, all sorts, no idea that there would be no future.
Just plain cruel.

Keeping_Motivated

SFH - your son will always remember them days out and how strong you were for his sake despite what you were going through.

Kizzy you are probably right about missing the adult company so try changing things so you organise as much things for you and the kids with other people as possible don't be on your own. And yes he is probably a habit like you say so I suppose these days out will help wean you off him rather than cold turkey which may help a little. Also if you are lonely remember that come September the children will be back at school and he will be at work so your days may be long try and think about that and put some things in place.

KM x

kimlisa66

kassytbag wrote: »

reading all these lovely messages and being able to talk to people going through the same thing - i have just been downstairs made a cup of tea and realised that for the first time in eight weeks im not shaking or checking my phone in case he has rung - i cant beleive how nice you guys all are - i have felt so low - nearly took an overdose one night but i couldnt do that to my girls - i have been so desperate for him to come back even though he has been so horrible - threatened in front of kids to put house on the market that day - has also told me he will devalue his business so i get next to nothing - and still i wanted him back - i need to get smart now and i think the post about being happy is the best revenge is so right - i just want to stop hurting and start to move on - i thank god i found this forum tonight!!!!!

Hey hun, he sounds exactly like my Ex OH....a bully and an abuser...he can't put the house on the market, you have rights and he cannot just turf you out like that.

Is the house in joint names ? You say he transferred the mortgage to interest only ? Did he do this with your consent ? He sounds like a complete control freak who is only concerned with satisfying himself, but you have got to rise above him and come out fighting, hard and dirty if need be.

I tried the nicey nicey route, did me no favours with him whatsoever........so now its bareknuckles or nothing now for me.

Make sure your solicitor spells it out to him what you want, and do not be bullied into selling your house. Let it go to court if it has to, he might be in for a nasty surprise.

Just an update on my situation with my cheating, drinking, gambling, abusive ex... he took our daughter to a friends's bbq today ( well, no friend of mine, they sided with him because the husband had been doing the same thing, they were covering for each other) and when I spoke to her at 9pm, she was sat watching him drinking and playing poker for money. with his disgusting drunken friends........highly inappropriate for a ten year old but he seems to think its perfectly acceptable. If I say anything, he just laughs at me or talks over me.

Why are some men such tos***ers ?

Love and light to all going through hard times

K x

scottishfreebiehunter

Thats it in a nutshell I miss adult company to as struggling at night.
Today sat on a train spilling my gutz out to some stranger and she was telling me stories etc etc
It is not right that they think they can walk away from there family and expect to plod back in whenever they feel the need.
My ds told him tonight on phone that he was not wanting a dad who only turned up once a week :eek: