MONEY MORAL DILEMMA: Should you foot the bridesmaid bill?

ribbonbow

my friend was one of 3 bridesmaids to a friend and they were requested to pay for their own outfits because the bride had decided to buy herself a pair of Jimmy Choos & so had no budget left for the bridesmaids!!

Couples should not ask people to be bridesmaids if they cannot pay for them (unless its shoestring)- whats next -are the guests gonna have to buy tickets for the wedding?!!

tealady

I think it is a cheek for a bridesmaid to cough up for their own outfit. If the bride wants something then they should pay for it. It is a form of bullying imo if people are asked to pay for their own bridesmaids outfits. If a bride asked me to pay then there would be only one answer and thats two words second word "off"

Taffybiker

If the bride and groom were genuinely strapped for cash then I may consider hiring a dress for my daughter seeing as how it's unlikely to be worn again, but anyone who can afford a really posh reception can also afford the dresses.

babyharry5

i would say that i was not in a position to pay for their dress - either my daughter would have to step down or I would offer a contribution equal to the amount I would have spent on a dress for her to attend the wedding

Paddington

I think the bride should choose the outfits overall but a considerate bride would ask the bridesmaid what style they prefer and think about their shape and colouring.

In the UK the bride pays for the bridesmaids' dresses. In the US each bridesmaid pays for her own dress.

Pooka

My husband and I got married 8 years ago and were determined that everyone who came would have a great day - especially us! We were prepared to pay for everything, but my parents helped out - mum paid half of my dress and bridesmaid dress. Dad paid for reception.. My bridesmaid was my sister, both of our dresses were designed for us, to our own specific taste, by a fantastic little shop in Leeds and cost £750 and £180 respectively. Both of us have worn the dresses since (my outfit had a gold skirt and red bodice with roses).
We had the type of "do" that all of the friends and family who came would enjoy. We were neither expensive nor cheap and the only thing we didn't pay for was drinks at the day and evening do (except the champagne toast).
I would never expect to pay for a bridesmaid dress for someone else's wedding and the kind of friends I have wouldn't expect me to either! Equally, I would never ask a friend or sister to wear an outfit that they didn't love for any occasion - not even my wedding!

tishunt

My sis in law got married last week with my daughter as bridesmaid. we agreed to pay half towards the dress and paid for the shoes. My sis in law paid half for the dress and any alterations that were required together with the costs for flowers, head dress and hair styling.
All in all it was very fair as we did have to travel over 200 miles and hotel stays for fittings and the wedding.

Old_Git

why does the bride get to spend £1,000 on a dress and the groom gets a hired suit

sluggy1967

KathyRich wrote: »

My half sister got married a while ago she had 8 bridesmaids, three of which were my girls. I was not expecting to have to pay anything, but was informed that the mother of two of the other bridesmaids and page boy was going to pay for their outfits. We were put in a very difficult position because the bride and groom "had no money" and my father was paying for this "very expensive wedding" If we had refused to pay then the bill would have gone to my
retired father. My husband was working overseas at the time and everyone assumed that we could afford it. The dresses all had to be handmade - because having 8 bridesmaids it was difficult to buy off the peg. Our bill came to £800 for dresses my girls didn't like and never wore again. After buying a wedding present and paying for 2 rooms at the hotel this wedding cost us a
staggering £1,250.00. !!!

You would think we learned out lessons, but when my other half-sister got
married the same thing happened again and we had set a precident.

My advice would be to say that you can afford a set amount say £50 or £100
and stick to it. When a bride is arranging her fairytale wedding - I'm afraid
your financial situation is way down the list of priorities!!!

In a situation like that, I would have refused to have bought a present for them!

AngryTank

I just celebrated my 5th wedding anniversary recently and I can tell you that no-one paid for dresses or suits at our wedding. My wife and I chose what the wedding party would wear and we paid for it, and I think that's the way it should be. I would be willing to contribute to the cost of a friend or family members wedding if they asked and it was clear they needed the help rather than just wanting to save themselves the money.