Christmas - bah, humbug!

margaretclare

Hi all

It's amazing how many people have posted here saying they don't like Christmas, they don't want to buy presents for people who don't appreciate them (spoilt little madams etc). I'm not sure what a BB gun is but I've disapproved of the idea of toy guns for many years now, and they're even more dangerous nowadays, remember the guy who was shot dead because the police thought he was carrying a gun which turned out to be a chair-leg! And similar episodes.

So why don't we all stand up and say NO - I'm not doing it any more!

Those who like to have a family get-together can do so. Those who go to church can do that (although last year we avoided going to church on Christmas Day, the first year I've missed in donkey's years, simply because we knew the minister would say to the children 'And what did everyone get?' I guess it's 'just a bit of fun', showing their new toys (and one was some kind of armoured vehicle model! - in church! - and the men showing off their socks that play 'Jingle Bells' etc) but we decided to avoid it.

On a money-saving site it seems an appropriate place to discuss how NOT to spend money that you don't want to spend.

So what do I like about it? Anything? Well, I always send Christmas cards. I bought them already from the RSPB site, but I buy from a different charity each year, usually an environmental charity like the Woodland Trust. There are people I send a card to, with a letter, that I've kept in touch with for years, but only once a year! Apart from that, we don't decorate, don't bother with tree etc.

The farm we buy all our meat from (found them on the bigbarn site) have free-range bronze turkeys, too big for us so we'll have a turkey crown from them. And have a nice meal together with a bottle of wine. Probably go down the sea-front if it's a nice morning, watch the birds - the winter visitors - the little boats, the morning joggers...and that's it really! But that's what we like.

Suggestions?

Aunty Margaret

sooz

leftieM wrote:

Thanks for all of your stories and suggestions. My husband has turned out to be against the idea of changing the way things are done in his family, which I must accept. However, we have come to an agreement about budgets and types of presents.
I'll work on him again next year though!

try leaving it all up to him then. he thinks about, chooses, buys and wraps for everyone.

might change his mind by next year.

i only buy for kids and something for grandparents. if you are old enough to know who santa really is..........then you don't need a present.

margaretclare

sooz wrote:

try leaving it all up to him then. he thinks about, chooses, buys and wraps for everyone.

might change his mind by next year.

i only buy for kids and something for grandparents. if you are old enough to know who santa really is..........then you don't need a present.

I agree with this! If your husband wants to carry on with the way 'things have always been done in his family' then let him get on with it. Don't argue, don't raise your voice, just say quite calmly 'fine, that's what you want to do, then do it.' Leave it at that. Don't be pressurised/blackmailed/railroaded into doing things that other people are doing for no good reason. I think the excuse 'oh but that's the way it's always been done' is the worst possible reason for doing things. You hear it within families (especially around Christmas) and you also hear it in the workplace.

Best wishes

Aunty Margaret

sooz

reverse psychology [spelling?] works wonders.

'yes darling, i totally agree with you, why don't you do it.....'

mariauk

margaretclare wrote:

So why don't we all stand up and say NO - I'm not doing it any more!

Hi Margaret

I totally agree with everything you have posted so far on xmas! I have made a stand and said "no more" and for my sins I have suffered But I will be standing by my guns again this year! The most important people to me in the world (my children) understand why I have choosen this path and are quite happy with the thought of getting away to somewhere "different" at some point instead of having "xmas". A friend of mine who`s family live in Hull always have a get together in October and use the time to have thier own family gathering as xmas brings so many headaches with the "who do we invite/go to this year" scenareo. I think it really sad when materialism is even brought into church on xmas day, its like everyone has forgotton the exact meaning of what xmas was for in the first place! If as many people stood up and didn`t cave in under the "social" pressure of what xmas brings, I`m sure there would also be a lot less families having arguments and falling out in December! Take Care

maria

elona

It is really reassuring to see the last few posts - especially margaret clare.

I have started to think about Christmas presents for my daughters , husband , father and some elderly relatives but only intend to buy things that will be used and appreciated - not "labels" and not the latest "gadget".

Have got some good bargains so far and looking out for freebies, special offers and making my own jam etc for a hamper.

We will have a quiet family meal and spend some time together but if DDs have any other plans then that is fine.
I am just grateful for a happy and healthy family that enjoys being together.

margaretclare

elona wrote:

It is really reassuring to see the last few posts - especially margaret clare.

We will have a quiet family meal and spend some time together but if DDs have any other plans then that is fine.

I am just grateful for a happy and healthy family that enjoys being together.

Thank you for the kind comments. I think that most of us have a lot to be grateful for, if we're honest. A lot of the 'must-haves' that are thrown at us all year round (and more intensively towards Christmas) are just rubbish, a waste of time, money and effort.

Some people I talk to seem to be shocked that we're neither having the family for Christmas nor are we going to them. As long as the 2 of us are together then we're quite happy to 'do our own thing' in our own time and our own way.

I think that my husband Barry wouldn't do a thing about Christmas at all if I wasn't here, even though he's a member of the Methodist church as I am. He tells about Christmas trees, presents and turkey in his childhood even thought what they were really supposed to celebrate was Hanukkah! I specially buy cards with 'Season's Greetings' for the non-Christians that I know of, trying not to give offence, you see!

Elona at Tadcaster...some of my ancestors came from around there. Tockwith, Tadcaster, Bilton-in-Ainsty...lovely countryside and a lot of memories.

Aunty Margaret

Savvy_Sue

mariauk wrote:

I think it really sad when materialism is even brought into church on xmas day, its like everyone has forgotton the exact meaning of what xmas was for in the first place!

I dislike intensely having a Christmas tree in church, it has NOTHING to do with the Christmas story, and when it has 'presents' underneath it's even worse.

And I don't really like the parade of presents in church on Christmas Day, but my sisters and I always got something new to wear and it was lovely to 'show it off' - but only by wearing it!

I suspect this continues because the only way to get children to church on Christmas Day may be to tell them they can bring one of their presents ...

jellyhead

isn't the tree a pagan thing?

Louise1521

Hi Stellagypsy, I know exactly how you feel. My Mum died suddenly on Christmas Day last year, and I can feel myself getting worked up about having to face Christmas this year. I've told them in work that I'm not going to the Christmas Party this year, and I got similar responses back. In the past I've been guilty of spending way too much on pressies that are never played with. That's all going to change this year!!!