Would You Go To a Family Wedding If You Thought It Would Cost A Fortune?

Spendless

belfastgirl23 wrote: »

I don't think the question is at all about the wedding in one way, it's whether it's worthwhile doing this to catch up with extended family. I suppose I'd ask you whether if it was your side of the family it might feel worthwhile to you? And it would be good for the kids too to discover all these relatives they (potentially) don't really know. Having missed out on a lot of big family events as a child I'd say these things are quite important in helping to build family relations. You don't know if down the line your kids might strike up a friendship with some cousins or something.

This made me think and you're right I just hadn't realised it cos I am not in touch with my extended family and haven't spoken to my 3 1st cousins since they didn't turn up to my grandfather's funeral:mad: so really my family consists of 2 nans, parents, sister her family. So to me it's not worth it cos I wouldn't attend an out of blue invite from some distant cousin. DH was brought up as lot closer to his cousins and extended family.

I *think* I'll say I'm prepared to spend x amount going and if it can't be done for that then we'll not go. Now just to discuss the price.

Spendless

fay144 wrote: »

Considering that it's your husbands family, can you not discuss with his folks/brothers/sisters/etc, and club together to save on taxi costs to a travelodge?

d'oh:doh: of course. Also invited are my in-laws (fil not going due to looking after dogs), sil and neice (neice might not be coming) and an uncle if he's been invited, which as he's closer family than we are I would have thought so. Just depends on whether they are all going.:D

belfastgirl23

Spendless wrote: »

This made me think and you're right I just hadn't realised it cos I am not in touch with my extended family and haven't spoken to my 3 1st cousins since they didn't turn up to my grandfather's funeral:mad: so really my family consists of 2 nans, parents, sister her family. So to me it's not worth it cos I wouldn't attend an out of blue invite from some distant cousin. DH was brought up as lot closer to his cousins and extended family.

I *think* I'll say I'm prepared to spend x amount going and if it can't be done for that then we'll not go. Now just to discuss the price.

Sounds like my mum's side of the family and indeed there's been a recent falling out with the only aunt which means very little relative contact on that side. As for my dad, he's from a HUGE irish family but I rarely ever saw them due to parental divorce and I do feel I missed out on some interesting people though I'm trying to make up for it a bit now. But it's hard if you don't have the same level of shared information Good idea on the budget setting though, these things can eat up a massive amount of money if you don't keep a tight eye on it Hope it goes well.

Spendless

It's possibly sorted. SIL is going and she doesn't often drink, so if she doesn't she can drive us to the travel lodge.:T Thanks for all the opinions and comments though, it really made me think.:beer:

shellsuit

Spendless wrote: »

It's possibly sorted. SIL is going and she doesn't often drink, so if she doesn't she can drive us to the travel lodge.:T Thanks for all the opinions and comments though, it really made me think.:beer:

Good luck with it and if you do decide to go, I hope you have a lovely time!

Nenen

Glad to see it looks as if you've sorted it but just in case it's any use... you might want to try https://www.laterooms.co.uk to search for cheap hotels available for just one night.
Have a great time.:beer:

Cornishpixie_2

Spendless wrote: »

2 years ago my family was invited to a wedding in a different county. I enjoyed the actual wedding very much but I did come away with a nasty taste in my mouth over the expense.

The wedding was in the school summer hols. It took us ages to get there, cos other areas had only broken up that w/end and the traffic was HORRENDOUS. So we got to the B & B late, having not eaten as we'd not dared coming off motorway to eat as we'd planned. The only shop nearby was a little 'deli' that sold kettle chips and jars of chutney at £8 a time. A few sausage rolls, kettle crisps and some drinks and I didn't have much change from £20. :eek:

The B & B had charged us an extra premium as we wanted 1 Saturday night and of course it was school hols, so we had to compensate for any 'lost' bookings. It was the only place we could find that agreed to the booking. We left car at reception and caught a taxi back. For that we were charged £25:eek: with the reason 'cos it's after mid-night' . The following day when we were ready to pick car up it cost us a further £25 taxi fayre.:eek: I came away very grateful that we hadn't had to buy any new clothes with the exception of dd's that was bought in next sale.

So I'm not thrilled with delight to have got a new wedding invite:o . It is in the same county, albeit in a more 'touristy' area on exactly the same w/end. Myself and dh have something suitable to wear, but the kids would probably need something.

I can just seeing it costing a fortune the way the last time did. The person getting married is a distant cousin of dh's that I have never met.

What would you do?

My honest opinion I wouldn't go it just seems a lot of hassle for somone you barely know given last experience. Think as none of you really know people getting married maybe kids would enjoy controlled fun day out in this country. I would just send a card saying sorry unable to attend no real need to elaborate their not going to say why not.

glossgal

Give her your best and stay home

I'm the worst bah-humbug when it comes to weddings though, the trouble is people getting married seem to think their wedding is as important to everyone else as it is to them. A friend of mine recently complained about some elderly relative who didn't show to her wedding thus 'ruining' her seating plan! The guy was about 90! I resisted the urge to say he had probably died and that if so he had a lucky escape lol (tongue in cheek of course)

mrcow

shellsuit wrote: »

Also, with it being on a Sunday, it means taking time off work on the Monday and losing money, plus the kids having to take a day off school.

Petrol, clothing, hotel for the night, present, wage loss ~ it all adds up.

lol if it's somewhere in North Kent, I've got an airbed and you can always kip here (if you can handle all my children). Give me enough notice and I'll make sure I swap shifts to give you a lift there too. Save on hotel costs for starters!

shellsuit

mrcow wrote: »

lol if it's somewhere in North Kent, I've got an airbed and you can always kip here (if you can handle all my children). Give me enough notice and I'll make sure I swap shifts to give you a lift there too. Save on hotel costs for starters!

Aww what a lovely gesture!

To be honest, I don't think the hotel is that much, it's in Maidstone in a Manor house and they have rooms there, it's just that there would be 5 of us going which means 2 cars (I can't sit in the back all that way with my 2, noooo way :rotfl: ) and it's the petrol for the 2 cars there and back which would be the killer, plus my OH having to get the day off work.

If it was just me going I would snap your arm off though!