Would You Go To a Family Wedding If You Thought It Would Cost A Fortune?

Spendless

2 years ago my family was invited to a wedding in a different county. I enjoyed the actual wedding very much but I did come away with a nasty taste in my mouth over the expense.

The wedding was in the school summer hols. It took us ages to get there, cos other areas had only broken up that w/end and the traffic was HORRENDOUS. So we got to the B & B late, having not eaten as we'd not dared coming off motorway to eat as we'd planned. The only shop nearby was a little 'deli' that sold kettle chips and jars of chutney at £8 a time. A few sausage rolls, kettle crisps and some drinks and I didn't have much change from £20. :eek:

The B & B had charged us an extra premium as we wanted 1 Saturday night and of course it was school hols, so we had to compensate for any 'lost' bookings. It was the only place we could find that agreed to the booking. We left car at reception and caught a taxi back. For that we were charged £25:eek: with the reason 'cos it's after mid-night' . The following day when we were ready to pick car up it cost us a further £25 taxi fayre.:eek: I came away very grateful that we hadn't had to buy any new clothes with the exception of dd's that was bought in next sale.

So I'm not thrilled with delight to have got a new wedding invite:o . It is in the same county, albeit in a more 'touristy' area on exactly the same w/end. Myself and dh have something suitable to wear, but the kids would probably need something.

I can just seeing it costing a fortune the way the last time did. The person getting married is a distant cousin of dh's that I have never met.

What would you do?

Sola

Not go. I'd make an effort for immediate family, but not for someone as distant as that.

floss2

Nope, and state the expense as the reason (if any has the nerve to ask why!)

bestpud

No, I wouldn't.

If you desperately wanted to be there you wouldn't be asking this question.

If they desperately wanted you there, they'd have ensured you were able to tavel, and afford, to be there.

Riq

They are barely family so I would make excuses and not go.

I've never been to a wedding thinking about it.

Spendless

bestpud wrote: »

No, I wouldn't.

If you desperately wanted to be there you wouldn't be asking this question.

You're right. I'm not interested in going, mainly cos of the expense last time. We've just come back from a w/end break This was to have been our only 'holiday' this year, due partly to dh's work committments and partly due to us wanting to pay off our cc and save for an expensive holiday next summer to mark our 10th wedding anniversary.DH's work load has changed slightly over the past few weeks and we MIGHT be able to take a cheap, couple of days break in summer if one comes up and I can see this wedding taking up the money I would have liked. Unfortunatley dh is seeing it as a chance for him to see his extended family.

Errata

I wouldn't accept the invitation - it may well have been sent out of duty and politeness.

Alleycat

I guess it would depend on how much you would like to go. Forgetting the expense, if you could go, would you?

As you have done the expensive trip last time, you may be able to plan a bit more so it is not as expensive this time round. Such as timing the journey, making sure you bring packed lunches so you don't have to pay service station or expensive deli prices.

Could you if booking early enough get a good deal on a B&B, get the kids some nice clothes from Ebay? Or are there other relatives you could stay with?

I agree with you, that I also get a nasty taste if I feel I am being forced to spend excessively and we are also on a very tight budget. But it would depend ultimately on how much we wanted to go and if we could whittle down the cost at all.

Spendless

Alleycat wrote: »

I guess it would depend on how much you would like to go. Forgetting the expense, if you could go, would you?

As you have done the expensive trip last time, you may be able to plan a bit more so it is not as expensive this time round. Such as timing the journey, making sure you bring packed lunches so you don't have to pay service station or expensive deli prices.

Could you if booking early enough get a good deal on a B&B, get the kids some nice clothes from Ebay? Or are there other relatives you could stay with?

I agree with you, that I also get a nasty taste if I feel I am being forced to spend excessively and we are also on a very tight budget. But it would depend ultimately on how much we wanted to go and if we could whittle down the cost at all.

If it wasn't for the money then yes I would. Not because I really am bothered but so dh could see his extended family and they could see the children. There aren't any family to stay with. The kids clothes I'm not too worried about as they *might* have something suitable, or I'm sure I'll find something at a reasonable price. They are only 5 and 8, we're not talking about dressing teenagers.;)

Since I started this thread dh has rang to say he's been looking at b & b's so I'll see what price he comes up with, though he's finding what we discovered before, it is hard to get a 1 Saturday night booking in the school summer hols.

celyn90

I must admit if your DH is seeing it as a chance to see his extended family then I would perhaps suggest that he goes on his own. I would also suggest that just flying in for the day then flying back the same night or very early the following morning so you don't have to foot accomodation costs (depending on location, but I've done the out- visit-home in a day thing in Europe a couple of times and two red-eye flights are not pleasent but do-able - you can sleep on the flight or the bus) might be an option (not good for kids, but fine it it's just an adult travelling).

floss2

Where is the nearest Travelodge / Premier Inn / Holiday Inn Express? You should be able to get a single night in any of those.....