Debt & Depression - can anyone help???

tigerfeet2006

This board is amazing and I am proud to be part of it. Thank you to everyone who has opened up and shared they're stories. It is really wonderful and will help so many people who haven't yet posted and are lurking or those who are just making there first baby steps along the way and even us 'old posters' who have been here a while.

THANK YOU.

So_Sad_Angel

I agree TF ,

Can I say that if anyone is reading this & in the same or even near as I have been that they share with the guys here....please, please don`t suffer alone..it really helps to start dealing with debt..whatever the outcome may be (& mine is so uncertain at the mo) but I`m working through it!

Hugs to everyone (I`ve needed it today) Angelxx

Persolv0

Hello
Im glad I popped on to read the forum tonight and found this post.

Last night i had a major bust up with my boss that effectively will put my job on the line and after eating a suspect sausaga roll i was up being sick until 5 am this morning so all in not having a great day:o

I ve found that the debt burden ive built up over years with my wife can put both her and i into some really dark moods and feelings of despair and if im honest has led to some irrational behaviour(hence how i dealt so badly with my boss last night albeit i had reasonable justification but blew my argument out of the water by not dealing with it professionally....)

Im not a big poster here but i come and read the posts most days as reading how others are dealing with things and the incredible support people get here helps me get through each day.
I work quite a distance from home and theres no doubt these financial problems have taken there toll on my relationship with my wife and and it seems sometimes that our conversations are always about debts,bills and more debts.

If theres one piece of advice i would give and god knows i could do with following myself is to work together to decide what the best options are and to list the goals one step at a time really focusing on achieving each goal in turn as the depression from my point of view starts creeping in when i dont feel we move forward or reach decisions (easier said than done)

I see often people saying what a god send this board and the people on it are....its hard to put into words just how valuable this board is to me and i know theres plenty here feel the same.

I think after reading these boards I get a renewed energy to make the next step but if theres one thing Ill keep doing is coming here to read as right now in my life im happy to be supported on the crutches that this forum is.

thanks for posting this angel

and Dave......its already been said but well done on posting mate..

FeelingLow

Angel i had to post just to say how nice it is to read you sounding more positive this morning hun, & like TF i am so proud to be part of this board & the help & support we recive from each other is priceless

So_Sad_Angel

Hi FeelingLow,

Much better today..sun is shining & going to have another day sorting & clearing out. Hopefully I don`t want too many bad days like yesterday.

Persolv0 - nice to hear from you & you should post more often ...it sounds like you need to talk sometimes & this is the ideal place. My OH & I have been in similar place to you..debts that build up over many years & then one day we realised that we could not go on like this...that happened in Feb08 .

I have still not totally decided on BR - more long discussions this week are planned & no doubt you will see me asking loads of questions as a result!! But I know that someone here will offer advice & point me in the right direction to find a solution. I know OH & I have to do this ourselves but being able to share with others has been a god send.

Take care & when you are ready to post some more lets see if we can help.

Angelxxx

cazjenki

Hiya, finally prised the laptop off the kids so can catch up with the posts. I went BR at the beginning of the month and 3 weeks down the line I am a much happier person thats for sure. I had been advised to go BR but was unsure what to do but deep down I knew it would be for the best and it was the best thing I ever did to get my life back to some sort of normality. For the first time in ages I have gone a week without 1 call from a creditor and what a relief it has been, I am no longer a nervous wreck, well compared to what I was a month ago lol. 2 months ago the post on here were from a complete stress head and although I never had the guts to write it on here at the time, one night when driving home from a family birthday alone it actually crossed my mind just to stop steering and put my footdown, I then thought about my family having to travel the same road home and have to come across what might have happened. It was then I realised that I had to go for it and move on. I hope you can make that decision and move on with your life if you think it is what is best for you but if you do decide to go for it everyone on here will be here for you like they were for me. Goodluck.

cazjenki

ignore this please : )

dalip

Hi Caz
No certain but think it is classed as aquired after bc, which means the it has nothing to do with the OR especially since your dad is buying it and not you. The only thing it may affect is if you got an IPA and did not allow for a car before you may want to now. Then obviously you will have to go back to your OR. If your OR was the approachable sort then you may well feel better telling him anyway just to make sure.
Glad things are moving on for the better for you.Dalip

suexxx

Hi everyone
I just wanted to say it is a comfort to know other people are out there going through the same things.
I to suffer from deppression i have done on and oof for yrs,it runs in the family,but since ive had these debt problems(just sorting DMP with CCCs) ive never felt so low,i'm sat here and just cant stop crying,just don't feel like ive not got any fight left in me,feel so alone !
ive even started binge drinking,yesterday went to my local pub for a drink with my daughter,she had to go and meet a friend so i stayed there,this was 3.oclock,i was still there at closing time,i'd drank that much i could hardly walk,i just wanted to blot things out ! at the end of the night someone gave me a lift home,i did'nt know him from Adam,he did just drop me off but what if something else would of happend ?? this is'nt the 1st time ive done this at the time i just don't care !
woke up this morning still in my clothes i'd gone out in and now i feel 50 times worse than i did yesterday,i feel such a failure !
I always wake up with the best of intentions,gonna sort house out etc but its a mess,got tons of stuff to sell on ebay but just can't get the motivation to do it ! i think once this DMP is up and running i'll feel better(i hope so ) also my brother killed himself 6 weeks ago.he jumped off a block of flats,i'm still trying to come to terms with that,he was only 32 !
people say " Sue,yr young(39) attractive,got lovely kids etc etc what the hell you got to be depressed about ??
but people who have never had dark moments just don't understand !
I just want to get out of this dark hole !
Got no family around me,so coping on my own,i just hate life at the moment,ive got to get out of this mess !

Scarlett.1974

suexxx wrote: »

Hi everyone
I just wanted to say it is a comfort to know other people are out there going through the same things.
I to suffer from deppression i have done on and oof for yrs,it runs in the family,but since ive had these debt problems(just sorting DMP with CCCs) ive never felt so low,i'm sat here and just cant stop crying,just don't feel like ive not got any fight left in me,feel so alone !
ive even started binge drinking,yesterday went to my local pub for a drink with my daughter,she had to go and meet a friend so i stayed there,this was 3.oclock,i was still there at closing time,i'd drank that much i could hardly walk,i just wanted to blot things out ! at the end of the night someone gave me a lift home,i did'nt know him from Adam,he did just drop me off but what if something else would of happend ?? this is'nt the 1st time ive done this at the time i just don't care !
woke up this morning still in my clothes i'd gone out in and now i feel 50 times worse than i did yesterday,i feel such a failure !
I always wake up with the best of intentions,gonna sort house out etc but its a mess,got tons of stuff to sell on ebay but just can't get the motivation to do it ! i think once this DMP is up and running i'll feel better(i hope so ) also my brother killed himself 6 weeks ago.he jumped off a block of flats,i'm still trying to come to terms with that,he was only 32 !
people say " Sue,yr young(39) attractive,got lovely kids etc etc what the hell you got to be depressed about ??
but people who have never had dark moments just don't understand !
I just want to get out of this dark hole !
Got no family around me,so coping on my own,i just hate life at the moment,ive got to get out of this mess !

Aww Sue, you poor love.

I hope I'm not speaking out of line here, but have you thought about going to see your GP? It sounds to me like you're suffering from depression and there are things your GP can do for you to help you

You don't have to suffer this alone Sue <<hugs>>