Debt is so depressing

ashmit

Part of my problem is that I don't feel my husband should suffer from my past financial problems... he was unemployed for about 6 years until about 18 months ago and has only recently opened a bank account and started to really deal with money again. I don't want him to have to suffer too much because I was an idiot in the past when he's on such a low wage anyway.

I have a spreadsheet with countdowns for Christmas and people's birthdays and our wedding anniversary... I think I might make a new one counting down to my credit card being paid off, my dad being paid off and my student loan being paid off ;D I think doing little things like that might help.

jellyhead

it helps me, at least i know the debt is getting smaller instead of bigger, it takes away a lot of the stress just knowing that i'm in control of it.

i was on benefits and a student for years and never had a penny of debt but hubby came with more than 30 thousand in debt and that's pretty scary when you're used to living off a couple of thousand a year! he feels a bit guilty that i've been saddled with the debt but it's fine really as long as he doesn't go over budget. i'm very strict and have taken over his money completely, giving him 'pocket money' to spend every month and taking any credit card spends straight out of next month's pocket money (he needs my credit card for buying petrol). it makes him look henpecked and his friends laugh at him, but he's so useless with money that i have to do it. he's not too badly off actually, i wish i had as much disposable income as he does, we initially agreed a figure we'd both get each month but we can never afford for me to actually take any money other than buying the occasional book in a charity shop.

having a budget forces us (him, lol!) to think before buying things such as computer upgrades, faster internet, playstation games etc. so now these things are limited. we are less likely to buy expensive take-aways because if we go over budget the spreadsheet goes red. although he blames most of the debt on his ex i'm pretty sure hubby's spending habits haven't improved much because he's always run out of money 3 days after payday!!

ashmit

Ok, I just did my spreadsheet. At the mo, my credit card debt won't be paid off til Jul 08 (it's only £2000, but Martin ain't kidding when he says it takes a long time to pay off at the minimum payment - even when you stick to the first minimum payment and don't let that reduce every month!), my dad won't be paid off til Aug 2010 and my student loan not til Dec 2011. And that's not even counting the interest on my student loan (I just went back and calculated the interest roughly and with that added in it's April 2012).

So yeah. Our outgoings are already cut to the bone, and at least it's not getting any worse yadda yadda, but I need to increase our income. I suppose the interest on the money sitting in my Cahoot account courtesy of Egg and Natwest ;D will help to pay it all off a bit quicker, but even so, that's a long time to be paying off debt - nearly as long as it took me to run it up.

ashmit

I've actually just had a slight realisation that I'm paying it off slightly faster than I thought so I've recalculated and I'll be debt free by May 2011 - still bl**dy awful, but better than I first thought I suppose.....

rushnowt

I know it looks bleak ashmit, but keep your chin up at least your going in the right direction. my thoughts and best wishes are still with you ;D

Spendless

ashmit - how would you feel about posting up your outgoings - so any members can see if they can suggest things you may not have considered.

I have seen this done on the debt board a couple of times when members think they are stuck - and have posted up and people have come up with ways to cut back.

Someone also suggested something to me once - about a saving i could make on hubbys packed lunches- it was only a little thing - but something i'd never thought of before

ashmit

Thanks rushnowt and spendless - you'd think I'd feel more miserable knowing that it's going to take so long, but at least I know now and anything extra that comes my way can go to paying it all off a little sooner.

Spendless, I've been thinking about posting my outgoings for that reason, but I'm nervous about actually doing it as I've sent on the emails from Martin to lots of friends and family and while most haven't mentioned it you never know who's lurking and has worked out who you are (my best friend is actually here but I trust her! ;D ). But maybe I'll do it and just not leave the actual figures up for very long. I think there's nowhere left to cut back, but I'm aware that I'm so close to it that I quite possibly can't see the obvious.

Nickynoo1

Ashmit,

I too thought that I had saved in all areas until I posted my outgoings. (over on the debt board) my reason was i have an impending drop in salary to come, but still need to pay debts.

Not an ideal solution but one possible money maker....would you consider getting a lodger in. Maybe just for 6 months or so. All the money (around £250 per month) could go to the debt. That would be a sizable chunk.
I know it may not be suitable for you, but it's somthing to think about if things get desperate.

I've taken a part time bar job to bring in extra at the mo, and put it all to the c/c. It can be tireing at times, but it's worth it.

Hope your having a good day

Nickynoo1

ashmit

Oh God.  We just got rid of our incredibly annoying lodger, so no, that's not really for us!  I would be interested in short term lets to people still, but hubby works in a letting agency and deals with incredibly annoying students and other rich stupid people* every day  ;D  Funny, but as far as outgoings go (so to speak) we spend less now she's gone - we get tons less takeout, for instance, cause she's not getting under our feet all the time

I do keep thinking of getting a bar job but I'm knackered as it is and being newlyweds who've had a lodger since before hubby moved in (and have therefore not lived on our own together til 3 weeks ago) we want some time to ourselves!  But I think that in a few months I might reconsider that!

* not all rich people are stupid, but the ones who are seem to all use his letting agency! ;D

ashmit

I would just like to say *YAY FREE MONEY* - just got my first direct free £25 and requested £15 worth of rpoints this morning - means I can get a new pair of shoes that I desparately need - starting a new job on 22 November and my mum has been telling me forever that my shoes are disgraceful - they won't know I'm a scruff within minutes of me starting now!!!

And any change can be put towards paying off my debt, eh?

And... I am going to post my outgoings on the debt board at some point soon (although I'll probably not leave the detail up for very long) - thanks for all your help and support here and I'll link from here when I put the details up. (convoluted sentence or what??)