The giving up/cutting down alcohol support thread!

Leigh73

Thank You all, for your kindness and support.

My last drink was on Saturday night, and the strange 'sensations of confusion' and anxiety yesterday and this morning, has really given me the impetus to stop the boozing altogether. The very thought of not having that extra boost to my (already lacking) self - confidence scares me though.

Re - the job, I was working at a small (although very successful online) Hi-Fi store. There are only about 9/10 people working there, including the boss and his wife. There is no 'HR' department!

I'm tempted to 'copy and paste' his email on here, just to see what you think, but I'm not sure about the legalities of this..

I actually dropped my CV to them back in mid - January would you believe, and finally got through from about 60-odd people, down to the final two of us, and then he took us both on. We both did a 'trial day' a couple of weeks back, (for which we were both paid cash in hand), and then we started 'properly' on a 3 month probationary period last Monday.

In a nutshell, he said this afternoon over the phone, that he was about to send me an email, outlining why he didn't think it would work out, and that my request for a meeting was unheard of in 20 years! He also suggested that I was over - sensitive, which stung, to which I replied "Well, while it's nothing personal, I've worked with other groups of blokes (I'm also a bloke!) before, and I've never experienced such aggro, and insensitivity!"

I was careful not to argue, and we both remained calm and civil, with him offering to send me my wages for last Mon, Tue, and Wednesday.

I'm still in shock really, so sorry if this isn't making mush sense

Yet again though, my sensitivity and inability to deal with 'macho b*ll' has helped me shoot myself in the foot..

Thanks for listening,

Leigh x

Leigh73

PS - I meant, I'm not sure about the legalities of my posting his email on here, rather than the legalities of him getting shot of me.

I would've thought he was perfectly in his rights to get rid of me, as I was on a 3 month probationary period, and I vanished for 2 days on the trott..

It's just the whole 'gang mentality' of some blokes I've never being able to relate to, and as I've been bullied at school sixth, sixth form, at Drama school and in other jobs too..there's obviously some screwed up vibe I'm inadvertantly sending out..

Cheers,

Leigh x

shopaholictiedtheknot

justwanabefree wrote: »

Well done singlemum thats the hardest part over - admitting that it's down to you to sort it out which ever way you can. Don't you find it's so much easier to talk to strangers in the same boat as opposed to friends and family who can't get the message through to you because you always feel that they are disapproving and judgemental.
Non of that here - just good to talk and listen.
Be honest with yourself and things can only get better
JWBF xx

It is much easier to talk to people on here, I find if I try to talk to my friends they just say things like 'oh you dont have a problem' or just laugh and think I am being melodramatic!

shopaholictiedtheknot

Hi all

Day 15 for me :T

I tried some alcohol free wine at the weekend but it was horrible - have decided I prefer 'pretend beer' to 'pretend wine' LOL:D

Leigh and Basilcat - I feel for you both, hope you are ok - try to keep positive and remember when one door closes another one opens, I am sure you will both find other jobs very soon

BHB - :T Well done

Hi and welcome to all the newcomers

winebox

jo1972 wrote: »

Oh no, hugs to you both Leigh & Basil

I'm not sure of the legalities (sp?) of your situation, come on guys, which board/thread can Leigh get advice? Don't let this hiccup (although a major one) spoil your cutting down/stopping efforts though. We are all here for you and trust me, things are always 100% worse when a little worse for wear, especially when you're at the end of the nights drinking and you get emotional, then even worse in the morning when you feel like s!!! and the problem is still there. What line of work do you do, is there a possibilty of getting summat else (((hugs)))

Basil, was this a total surprise to you? What grounds have they made you redundant? What's your plans, how long you got? (((hugs))) to you too hunny xx

Lurks/YM, I think we should start a 'giving up/cutting down fruit smoothies thread' just to take the onus off us!! :rotfl:

I don't mean to sound sanctimonious but I wouldn't touch a fruit smoothie, sooo addictive.

Don't want to be too much me me me, & I'm really sorry two of you have had bad news re jobs (but good advice back!!) but I just wanted to say I am finding this thread really helpful already. Actually putting stuff in writing has, just today after all these years, made me confront a few uncomfortable truths. When it's all just inside your head it's easy to rationalise, justify, forget about, but already feedback (thanks jo1972) has made me question my motivation for what I'm doing. For years I've said that if I die 10 years earlier becuase of the amount I drink then that's fine cos it's fun, but there comes a point when it ain't fun falling asleep in front of the telly night after night, & I think I'm at that point now. I think the only way forward is to not have wine in the house, it's too easy. I might well get in the car & head off to the shops in desperation but at least I'm forced to think about it. I know I'm "postponing the grief" (though hopefully it won't be grief life will get better) but I have a long weekend away coming up, but NEXT WEEK I have one golden rule - not to drink on my own. That's 4 or 5 nights a week sorted. Start now you say - well there are 2 bottles in the house shouting at me so tell you what, will try as of NOW not to buy any more for lonely consumption. Sorry to drone on. The other great thing about this thread is just that - to know I'm not alone with the issue. As an aside, I have put on 20lbs over last 18 months need to get that shifted!:eek:

yellowmonkey

Nice post winebox.

I am going through my stash and my new life begins tomorrow. I buy 8 cans with the intention of having 1 and drink the lot.

No beer,No fear. Motto for tomorrow and the future

Ive beaten Smoking. I can do this

ym

mollypolly

Well done Shopaholictiedtheknot. Day 15 already .wow.

Well done Winebox for admitting you have more of a problem than you thought.
I think most of us on hear have seen alcohol in a new light since finding this thread.
I certainly thought that I could take it or leave it but after not drinking for 3 weeks then having a holiday I was back to square one.With me I think it has to be All or Nothing.
Good luck in whatever way you decide to tackle your problem.Keep reading.
Love Mollypolly.xxxx

mollypolly

NO BEER NO FEAR.
Brilliant Yellowmonkey.:T

shopaholictiedtheknot

winebox wrote: »

I don't mean to sound sanctimonious but I wouldn't touch a fruit smoothie, sooo addictive.

Don't want to be too much me me me, & I'm really sorry two of you have had bad news re jobs (but good advice back!!) but I just wanted to say I am finding this thread really helpful already. Actually putting stuff in writing has, just today after all these years, made me confront a few uncomfortable truths. When it's all just inside your head it's easy to rationalise, justify, forget about, but already feedback (thanks jo1972) has made me question my motivation for what I'm doing. For years I've said that if I die 10 years earlier becuase of the amount I drink then that's fine cos it's fun, but there comes a point when it ain't fun falling asleep in front of the telly night after night, & I think I'm at that point now. I think the only way forward is to not have wine in the house, it's too easy. I might well get in the car & head off to the shops in desperation but at least I'm forced to think about it. I know I'm "postponing the grief" (though hopefully it won't be grief life will get better) but I have a long weekend away coming up, but NEXT WEEK I have one golden rule - not to drink on my own. That's 4 or 5 nights a week sorted. Start now you say - well there are 2 bottles in the house shouting at me so tell you what, will try as of NOW not to buy any more for lonely consumption. Sorry to drone on. The other great thing about this thread is just that - to know I'm not alone with the issue. As an aside, I have put on 20lbs over last 18 months need to get that shifted!:eek:

Winebox, I can relate to your points - when I was drinking every night I used to fall asleep regularly much to the disgust of my OH and the amusement of my dd (she is 14 and I was setting her such a bad example!) and I have gained 2 stone over the past 3 years :eek: 8 pounds of which I have shed in the last two weeks purely from not drinking - I have been eating more than normal too!:eek: good luck on your quest and you are most definitely NOT alone I am comforted by that fact!!

shopaholictiedtheknot

Yellowmonkey - you most certainly can do it!!:beer: