The giving up/cutting down alcohol support thread!

graemecarter

SiannieLaz wrote: »

With regard to your comment above, of all the people that attend AA, only 5% of them are dry 1-5 years later. I agree AA does help some people, but it's only really helpful if you want to be a victim for the rest of your life, spending all your time NOT taking responsibilities for your own actions - "I give myself over to a higher power, etc". AA does not work for everyone, and if you look at the associated research, people who do it through other methods, including on their own, are more successful. And by research I don't mean AA statistics. Do you seriously think that everyone that attends AA doesn't miss alcohol? The whole time they are attending AA, the only thing they are focusing on is alcohol, instead of getting over it and moving on.

AA aside, I don't think anyone on this site suffers from 'personality defects'.

Hi to all :T and sorry for the rant, I just don't like being preached to as I found AA to be totally depressing and offering absolutely no light at the end of the tunnel.

WB - so so sorry to hear about your Dad, keep your chin up chick, we're all hear when ever you need us xxx

I don't agree with your views on AA , especially the victim mentality. I am not a victim, neither is anyone else I know in the program. You may have got the wrong idea about it, which is quite common as no-one goes to AA for the fist time when they are having a good day.
I think you will find that people in AA take full responsibility for their actions, but they realise that they cannot control other people, and thus accept that.

But your method of controlling your drinking seems to be working for you, so well done.
As long as people get better, that's the main thing, AA or not.

I just knew I couldn't do it by myself:j

shopaholictiedtheknot

Hi all,

AFD No. 2 again for me today, determined to make it again today, picking DD up from drama at seven again so should help! Did a half hour workout last night so am well pleased with myself - I WILL shift the flab before Christmas!!!

Good luck today everyone xxx

SiannieLaz

Afternoon All,
AFD 4. for me today, going to follow others example and starting sticking my money in a jar, I thought £4 a day to start, that's the cost of 4 cans from my local corner shop (cheaper in Tesco!). Submitted an essay today which signals the end of one course, and as I didn't drink over the weekend, I'm much more hopeful that it's pretty good!!!
Got up super early this morning and went for a jog (more stagger) using a podcast i got off another thread, my legs are starting to stiffen already, but I haven't felt this positive in ages.

Well done on the workout Shoppie, it's the hardest bit for me.

Have a great evening all xxx

115K

Eselt - that was very sad to read but now you have really changed your life and that is great. Well done on being sober for nearly a year!:A

Someone gave us a bottle of white wine yesterday (:rolleyes:) but I didn't give in and so have had two AFD's so far.

I might have a glass of wine tonight in the bath (if I have any Weightwatchers points left over by tonight that is!) so it might not be an AFD for me today.

I think giving up or cutting down with alcohol is like giving up smoking or dieting, some people need regular outside support and some prefer to have control over it themselves, both ways can work but I think you have to try to see which way works better for you.:)

Saying that I haven't ever tried AA because I was paranoid that someone I know would be there which I know is silly.

Good luck everyone anyway.
x

Wanna_Bee_Free

Like others feel better for getting AFD1 out of the way - definitely on for AFD2 today.

I decided to diet this week and next as moral support with my Mum. And was initially more worried about two weeks not drinking than I was about the food thing! But now the food is being harder than the booze - as someone else said their stomach rumbling is distracting from the booze cravings - know exactly what you mean!

eselt

Hi all- thanks for the posts- you are such a sweet bunch of people you know. It doesn't seem like nearly a year since I gave up (or to put it more honestly alcohol gave me up!)- its like looking back at another world and another person- when people ask me where I've been for 2 yrs I just say 'abroad', they don't know that I've been over on the dark side!!! Gradually the shame, regret, guilt, stigma, hopelessness has diminished and over time I hope I can get my alcoholism in perspective- there was a time when thats all I was, a hopeless alcoholic, I didn't really think there was more to me than that, I was just consumed by it every minute of the day- but now the brain fog is starting to lift and for the first time in years I am starting to believe I deserve more than that label, and there are some things about me which I can like, and I can make changes which mean I could be known for something far more positive- I never set out to become an alcoholic, who would? It just started off with being shy and self conscious and alcohol gave me a bit of courage in social situations and helped with the nerves-seems such a feeble excuse now.

Loads of AFD's being clocked up at the moment- well done everybody.

Just about the AA debate, I just think whatever helps must be a good thing, and we all have our own strategies and our preferred way of tackling this, but if it makes a positive difference to peoples motivation then that can only be a good thing.

Bismarck

graemecarter wrote: »

I don't agree with your views on AA , especially the victim mentality. I am not a victim, neither is anyone else I know in the program. You may have got the wrong idea about it, which is quite common as no-one goes to AA for the fist time when they are having a good day.
I think you will find that people in AA take full responsibility for their actions, but they realise that they cannot control other people, and thus accept that.

But your method of controlling your drinking seems to be working for you, so well done.
As long as people get better, that's the main thing, AA or not.

I just knew I couldn't do it by myself:j

meant to say after your first post ,that I agreed with a lot of what you said......bit rushed at the moment but will hopefully get more chance later.


take care everyone....and don't beat yourself up about the past.....it's done....

make the most of the future....you survived for a reason!

Pippilongstocking

HIya
AFD 3 today (if that is right) sun, mon tues - hope eveyrone is ok, some heartfelt reading - have avoided the supermarket for over a week now, went to butchers for my weekly shop. I (very sadly) have the reciept for the last bottle of wine i drank a glass of in my purse (that I bought). Anything else I am ashamed to say has been thurst upon me - and when its put in my hand I am a bit crap, but have only had a couple of glasses lately when it has happenned.

I feel like a complete plonker for how much of this past year I have screwed up - reviewing my work files, and so much of it is - oh I will finihs that later - trying to undo the mess at the moment, what was I thinking. Onwards and upwards - waving to you all =- take care.

biscotte

Evening folks,

thanks everyone for posting - this thread is so good for me. Eselt, I can only imagine how much your life has changed over the past year and how different you must feel and probably how thankful that you got out. Your posts really make me think about alcohol and my attitude to it and where it takes me - thank you. The way alcohol as social disinhibitor and makes us more outgoing is a fundamental part of my relationship with alcohol- I do feel far more competent socially with a glass inside me and love the lift that I feel when slightly squiffy. But that will not compensate for the feelings of shame and pain when I don't stop and go on to get sloshed and out of control and then hungover. it also doesn't work when I just tipple at home with DH and end up feeling carp and tired at 6 the next morning when getting everyone up and out of the house.

I am not going out much at the moment so I feel quite in control. I'm sure that a night out would test me too much if i had even that first one I'd end up guttered.

Where's Jo tonight - no muskateers?

Pippilongstocking

muskateer no ? checkng in - working and on the coffee - x will take time to read through, you are right Biscotte - one drink on a night out then I am generally guttered too cos it dont stop, thread good for me too - x