We are being evicted, some advice please...... the date has arrived......

ampersand

Well done bm and v(again!) -
I have felt throughout that the decision makers should have first-hand experience of your daily life but equally felt Ryan should not be 'used' to this end and know you'd never countenance such an interpretation.
I put that clumsily, so forgive me please - but you know what I mean and these people DO NEED TO SEE how Ryan is, even when kept safe with love and consistency in every aspect of his day that gives him such security as he relies on.
Raising someone with Aspergers Syndrome is not just a matter of reading Mark Haddon's novel.

neverdespairgirl

blue_monkey wrote: »

My hubby called after I left the post and I mentioned the road and garden situation to him and he said 'he did not see what I had to deal with daily so if I did not think it was right then we would no go for it'. Which is what I said really, he must of thought on things some more (although still maintains he was not in a strop about it!!)

Sounds very sensible - you are the one who will be dealing with parking away from the house, and the children, so you are better placed to see any issues arising.

blue_monkey wrote: »

So, as you can imagine Pingu is on the TV, it just started raining and the wind is howling.

With my darling DS, it's Spot. In Hebrew. I could throttle the little dog, really I could (-:

neverdespairgirl

blue_monkey wrote: »

I have 2 broken teeth, I've never been able to get them fixed (2 years now) as I cannot get to the dentist,

Can your OH not look after him so that you can go to the dentist? Take a day's holiday?

neverdespairgirl

blue_monkey wrote: »

I hate being wanty, needy and feeling absolutley desperate. It is not me, I can't even bring myself to cry in front of anyone over this as that makes me look weak and stupid.

This is your Good Friday. But it is always followed by Easter Sunday. :A

blue_monkey_2

Thanks NDG, yes I see what you mean. It used to be different as in my husband's last job he used to get quite a lot of time off in the week as some of his shifts were weekends. Because both of us were here we just did what we had to, dealt with Ryan as we had to - it was only as he has gotten older that more and more of his AS has become apparent. The behaviour and other bits I put down to me doing something wrong so I would never admit that there might be a problem. It was the school picking it up that made me see there must be something, otherwise they would have dealt with him in another way. My husband does not get a lot of holiday really, last years he used most of it early on for a big holiday (from his termination pay when he was dismissed, most we used on bills/debts and then we thought s*d it, we need a long holiday so booked one - using our CC vouchers of course and then put some money towards it) and now we are 'saving it' for when we move/get thrown out, he has one for tomorrow and he had one when I had to take the cats to the cat home. Because of the uncertaintwe face it seems a 'waste' to use a days holiday for something I do not *need* (tooth is not hurting - touch wood now). I guess it is hard to explain really. It'll be different when Ryan is at school and then I'll have time to deal with these things that have been put aside, it's not too far away that why it has not been an issue. where my husband works now he is on the road and could be 60 miles away come 'knocking off time' although he gets paid for the travelling so it is overtime it means we can never plan anything as such as he cannot tell where he is going to be from one day to the next. He is probably not going to be here for the Health Visitor today, little things that you cannot really plan for because of the job. but he loves his job and this is important too, you have to have a reason for getting up and going ou to work else you end up resentful (I think, anyway).

A - no no no, I never thought this at all so please do not apologise, it was not interpreted this way and I, nor anyone else I am sure, felt you said something the wrong way so please get that from your mind.

I don't think I am using him at all but I am doing what I am doing to ensure that his life is kept at minimal disruption. If he was in a wheelchair and they offered us a place with stairs and without adaptions then we would fight that too because he is my child and I want to ensure that he does not suffer through all of this. It is nt the kids fault that any of this has happened but at the same time I want to ensure tat they get the best. Such as the original letter from the doc to ensure DD has her own room so she had her 'safe' place from Ryan - the doc agreed to this, but again, another fight to get what is needed because of a health problem. Indeed the council originally said to me (you'll laugh at this now) 'you are not being needy you are getting what you need for your families need'. I bet she had wished this line had not crossed her lips now, LOL!!

PS. Guess what is on the TV.....

nimbo

dopester wrote: »

No disrespect to you but I can't help
but think you do like to wallow in
quite a few minor ancient problems.

I've done volunteer work for the blind
and have never heard any of them moan
so much at the bad hand they've been
dealt.

It also seems you might have a dispensation for
getting into difficult troublesome situations.

I'm only saying this because other than
that you seem to put your points of view
across eloquently and intelligently - (more
paragraphs please) which suggests you could
embark on a happier future if taking a most positive
outlook with a willingness to let go of past problems.

Compared to some, your situations seems
absolutely rosey.... a lot of hard working
people are being ripped apart by debt... and
as the effects of the credit crunch deepen
many will lose jobs, be plunged in to negative
equity, lose their homes... and well.. you've
got a lot to be grateful for as you don't
have half those problems. Nevertheless....
good luck in sorting out suitable accommodation.

this wonderful woman is being evicted by her mother, and has been told that she will not be given emergency accomadation until baliffs are on her doorstep, surely she is allowed to feel more than a bit stressed??

blue_monkey_2

Oh no......

I have had a letter from my MP this afternoon..... remember I had emailed him telling him about the council not calling us back despite us getting 14 days notice and that there was no effort to help us despite them knowing this was coming for 5 months, etc.... it was a bit long winded thinking about it as the council had not called me back.

He has sent me a letter today 'thank you for your email dated 2nd April, I have immediately forwarded a copy of this to x at EHC asking what may be done to resolve this situation.

The letter is dated 7th (monday just gone). :rotfl: :rotfl: :rotfl: :rotfl: :rotfl: :rotfl: :rotfl:

Oops!! Have I set a cat amongst the pigeons I wonder. I guess we will find out tomorrow.
:rolleyes: :T :lipsrseal :idea: :whistle: :think: :dance: :shocked: :laugh: :cool2: :rolleyes2

Mollymop5

H, another lurker here.I've no practical advice unfortunately but just would like to wish you well on Thursday

sasp

Hi BM,

I just hope on the day of the meeting that Ryan gives an all star performance and shows them one tiny hint of the stress you, your little girl, hub (and indeed Ryan himself) have to cope with as a result of his AS. These people who are making the judgements on how you and your family live really have NO CLUE what you go through every minute of the day living with a child with AS.
It makes me soo cross that anyone should need to see for themselves how R is and somehow base a decision on your life about housing.

You have enough to cope with simply trying to help R lead as 'normal' (for want of a better word) as possible.

Most of us find the task of managing finances, debts, employment, relationships etc hard enough but to do this with your child having a disability (including Aspergers/Autism) is one amazing task and takes a very special/strong person.

As for those posters who assume this is in any way an attempt for BM to relish in self-pity, as a sibling growing up and witnessing the hardship that my parents had trying to 'cope' whilst my brother lived in his curious autistic world, I dare you to walk a day in BM's shoes.

Take care BM, and think on there are many people in your corner with large boxing gloves on!!

shar xx

vivatifosi

blue_monkey wrote: »

Oh no......

Oops!! Have I set a cat amongst the pigeons I wonder. I guess we will find out tomorrow.
:rolleyes: :T :lipsrseal :idea: :whistle: :think: :dance: :shocked: :laugh: :cool2: :rolleyes2

Hi hun,

Sorry, but in your situation at some point the cat and the pigeons are going to make each other's acquaintance. Just don't see it as your fault.