Toddlers and fussy eating (merged)

Gingham_Ribbon

I'm sorry I haven't read the whole thread, Happysad, so sorry if I've repeated anything.

I'm glad to hear he's trying more things. My 19 month old on the surface seems to be a picky eater. He is a fruitaholic too. And anything bready (pittas, sliced bread, taco shells, pancakes, tattie scones) but is a grazer and is not interested in sitting down to a whole meal.

Here's my opinion. Fair enough! In time he'll understand that it's the done thing to have 3 meals a day but for now providing nutritious snacks is keeping fhim fit, healthy and very active. I bet your son is the same!

Things he turns down, I offer again next time I'm cooking it and again and again. No fuss if he rejects it. Big whoop if he has a go. Although he eats his food cut up into chunks, I do still mash new things and add cheese/yogurt/something else he likes sometimes to get him to taste them.

The advice someone put earlier about eating together is good and also having him sit in his chair to eat regularly. It's something I didn't do because of my back. I couldn't lift him into the seat and we got used to eating on the sofa during the day and at the table when daddy's home. He still thinks that's the way although he can climb up on a chair by himself.

There's a big worry about kids' nutrition in general it seems. Organic? Salt? Added sugar? Processed food? Sweets? Juice? How much? How often? I worry when he's stuffing his face all day and worry when he's not interested in food. I worry when he wants to eat fruit all day and worry when he loses interest. There's a lot of pressure, child obesity, child eating disorders, atheroma... Everyone's got an opinion. I made the mistake of reading loads of weaning books. They all gave conflicting advice.

I'm finally chilling out and realising that food ISN'T an issue. We have it in abundance in this country. If he's hungry he'll eat. If he's not he won't. Stickers would have no effect on my son. I think that'll come in the next few months but there's a big difference between 19 months and a 2 year old. They change so quickly.

From reading this and other threads, you sound like you're doing a fantastic job with him. Congratulations! It's rewarding but it's hard work!

Oh and have fun with the baby sign. My son signs too and it's given me such an insight into his little whirlwind of a mind! :j

frostyspice

Hi Happysad and all the other helpful contributors to this thread which I have read with great interest as my 20-month-old second son sounds exactly like Happysad's little boy. I'm going to try out the advice given and try to keep cool. I just don't know what to do about his throwing the food off the plate and on to the floor! Usually i just clean it up and make no fuss, I've tried getting him down from the table to let him know this is not acceptable but i'm not sure it works as he screams for his yogurt then and i end up putting him back. When we visit other people's houses i have to keep a close eye on him as he would do it there too. Should i be ignoring this or letting him know in some way that he shouldn't do it?

He gets really upset when i offer him food he doesn't like, turns his face away and looks very sad (Does he know exactly how to make mummy feel guilty???!!!!). Then his older brother (3) gets upset and tells him to eat his dinner up.

The other thing i worry about is that he's very funny about touching certain foods and hates to have eg pasta sauce on his fingers.

kids eh - i know he'll grow up and eat me out of house and home one day but it doesn't feel like it at the moment!

Gingham_Ribbon

Hi frostyspice! They're funny at this age aren't they! My son throws food on the floor. BUT, it's not a food thing. He throws everything on the floor. He's just experimenting, not just with what our reaction will be, but with how it feels, where it goes, if it'll stay there, bounce etc etc. It's a trying time when they do the same thing over and over but it's a great way to learn! I bet your son's spoon and cup go overboard too!

Obviously there have to be boundaries. I'm picking my battles though and I'm turning a blind eye to throwing food in favour of dealing with his danger lust! I don't want to be on his case too much!

Instead, when we eat at other people's houses etc, I only give him small amounts at a time and keep the rest out of reach. Mostly finger food and I try to avoid anything he can send flying off the spoon like yoghurt! OR I feed him rather than let him do it which he likes anyway. It'll pass, I'm sure as long as we keep rewarding them with praise and cuddles when they eat without throwing.

Also, I know what you mean about him not liking the feel of certain things. Again, it's probably not just about food. My son loves getting filthy in the park but he doesn't like the dirt on his hands. He also doesn't like the feel of sauces drying on his fingers if he's taking his time with food. I just help him wipe his fingers and try to show him that it's not nasty.

So I reckon you should hang in there and praise him like mad when he's doing it right. They'll all be playing a new game soon enough that'll drive us even more crazy! :eek:

Have fun!

frostyspice

Hi Gingham Ribbon!
Thanks for your good advice. You're right, everything goes on the floor with my little one and I expect he'll get bored of it in time, especially if he gets no attention for it.
I'll keep on praising him when he is being good.
Good luck with yours!

Gingham_Ribbon

frostyspice wrote:

Hi Gingham Ribbon!
Thanks for your good advice. You're right, everything goes on the floor with my little one and I expect he'll get bored of it in time, especially if he gets no attention for it.
I'll keep on praising him when he is being good.
Good luck with yours!

Nice one!

After posting my reply about throwing things on the floor, I couldn't believe what I found on the floor of his bedroom this morning. He'd extracted the (solid) contents of his nappy and given it a good hurl. :eek: He thought it was hilarious. I passed him to his dad with a simple 'where's the poo? That was naughty' and he cleaned and changed him while I scrubbed the carpet.

Then this morning I thought, right mister, the minute I hear you stir, I'm going to get you straight out of your cot BEFORE any shinanigans. So I went in as I started to hear him chattering to himself. He was still lying down half asleep. However, he'd taken his whole nappy off through the leg of his vest and he was soaked through, along with the bedding. He must have done it when he was going to sleep. Our baby monitor is broken and we can hear louder noises like talking or crying, but nothing as quiet as that. My husband checked on him at our bedtime and he was fine but he obviously didn't feel to see if his nappy was still on! :rolleyes: (It's too dark to see in there so he just feels to make sure he's not too hot or cold and put his covers back on him.)

I did say they'd have new games soon enough. But oh my! I thought I'd have a bit of a break first. Silly me. :rotfl:

MonkeyGirl

Just want to say how pleased I was to read he's eating now. Well done you guys on sussing out the likes and dislikes and I hope introducing new foods continues to go well for you all.

Roxie

My daughter had an extremely small appetite up to the age of 4, i used to worry constantly that she didn't eat enough. Once she started school her appetite seemed to change overnight and now i have the opposite problem in trying to curb it as she is becoming a little chunky. I would just say don't worry, but I know this is impossible if you're a parent!

atomicangel_2

Hi,

I work with parents who have children under five and work voluntary alongside the health worker at the sure start programme in my area and show them how to make healthy lunch boxes, and meals suitable for all the family. One tip we give parents is that 1 portion of fruit or vegetable will fit into the palm of your hand so for an adult a full apple is a portion but for a 2yr old it will be 3 or 4 slices of a small apple, one small box of raisins is a portion for adult half for child etc.. so long as you give your child variety of finger foods it is easier for them to eat with fingers when there under two once they get to about 2 and a half they strat to use fork and spoon more often. Also yous hould try to eat meals with your child so you are role model for them and they will copy and eat like you. It is best to switch the tv off and eat as a family, breadsticks are good form of carbohydrtes and mini pittas are good as you can fill them with toppings like cheese etc or meat etc.. Try making mash potatoes and mash the vegetales in them to hide the fact they are in there, also using different techniques like small jackets potatoes and sliced in half bakes the chesse on top then put a slice cheese as a sail, smiley faces on muffins with tomaoto paste and cheese melted ij oven or grill and using tomatoe and pepper to make the face, also use different colours of foods so this is more fun. And remeber don't get streesed if the child dosen't wnat to eat it then take it away and they will ask when they are hungry.

XXJULESXX

I'm reading everyone's success stories here and I am so envious!

I have a 32month old boy who MUST be the fussiest ever child. I am constantly looking for new ideas to get him to eat and constantly failing. He will eat only 4 different meals rotated between lunch and dinner 7 days a week. 6 months ago this was 6 different meals, but the longer it goes on, he goes off these foods through boredom of the same tastes, yet he point blank refuses to try anything new!

Breakfast every morning is porridge or cheerios and milk. He used to have a mid-morning snack but I cut it out as he tended not to eat his lunch afterwards. But for lunch/dinner he refuses to eat anything that isn't one of his four meals. So when I try to introduce a new meal, he refuses so then I don't give him anything else for the rest of the afternoon - no icecream, no custard, no yoghurt, no chocolate and no biscuits (and he knows the ONLY time he'll ever get any of them is when he has eaten all his lunch or dinner). And that's him until dinnertime,when I give in and give him one of his four usual meals for dinner, followed by a treat when he eats it all.

He won't eat fruit or veg - he'll ask for fruit then squidge it up in his hand every time without eating any of it. When preparing veg, he likes to touch it then throw it away. Anything new I give him, he won't even put near his mouth - he just won't look twice at it so how can I change this situation? Since birth he's been a very small /reluctant eater and in the last 9months since I gave up work and became a fulltime parent I am far less stressed about it - I don't make a crisis out of it, I'm very calm but I don't give in, I don't get stressed or upset - but I'm begining to lose hope now that this is just a phase.

Ive tried having him in nursery couiple of mornings a week and letting him have lunch with the other kids, but he would come home with his diary saying that he had a piece of toast for lunch - obviously if he wasn't eating what they offered him, they would give him toast - so now I have to pack a tin of spaghetti for him just so he eats something, so it's missing the point. I've tried intoducing new things when he's hungry in the evening through not eating lunch, but still, he'd rather starve than try something new!

Can anybody help?

Gingham_Ribbon

My son is only 19 months so I don't have experience with the will of an older preschooler so it might be worth speaking to your health visitor before implementing any of my ideas.

As you've got lots of time to spend with him, it might be worth getting him interested in food without making a particular point of it. For example, asking him to help choose food at the supermarket. By that I mean things like 'Which 3 carrots do you think mummy should choose?' Which apples look the tastiest?' 'Shall we find some cheese that looks tasty?' etc. Not suggesting that it's for him.

Also, if you're making mash, for example, you could ask him to rinse the potatoes before they go on the cooker, then help you set the timer. He could add butter/milk to the potatoes and help you mash them, again to 'help' you with no pressure that they'd be for him.

Involving him might make it seem more appetising, particularly if you eat at the table with him and tell him how lovely the things 'HE cooked' taste. He may even ask you to taste it.

You could use pieces of root veg cut into shapes to paint with then show him what they look like cooked. You could let him smell and touch different fruit and veg then cover his eyes and ask him to guess what the fruit is, the focus on fun and big praise when he gets it right (which if you start easy should be all the time!) You could do this with other things like sponges, brushes, soap etc so it's not all focused on food.

You could let him add something he likes to a meal he normally eats but wouldn't normally have together, eg raisins in his spagetti hoops, then try a food he doesn't normally have in it, eg grated or diced apple.

A sticker chart might work as he may be old enough to enjoy it. Tell him it's his chart for being a good boy and let him help make it and choose the stickers. Keep the aims of the chart really simple so as not to overwhelm him and to make sure he gets plenty of stars to begin with. You can always raise the bar later. Eg to eat at least 2 spoonfuls of something new every day, to help clear the plates when he's finished and maybe one other thing he can already do. He'll see the 2 stars and want the third to complete it hopefully.

He likes squidging food in his hands. Can you get him involved in making cakes? He can squidge bananas to his heart's content to make banana bread and when he smells it come out of the oven, you may find him wolfing it down.

Again I think it's worth stressing that if he thinks the pressure's on it will put him off even more. If he's still not interested, have another word with your health visitor, but if he's healthy and happy he'll probably get bored of it soon enough.

My neice was 6 before she grew out of her fussy phase so conserve some energy just incase!!!

I hope this helps.