Toddlers and fussy eating (merged)

Careful_girl

I would suggest along with all the others to keep feeding as calm as possible. Try to work out what he likes and what he doesn't. Perhaps off er the stuff he likes on both a spoon and as finger foods.When he refuses try to be interested in something else (the dog?). Walk off and leave him for a second. then come back and offer something else. When he acceps give him attention and or the food he likes. When the time comes when you have had enough or he is having a paddy, stop. Try again later. I wouldn't worry about the meal times if he doesn't eat much he needs a snack. Make it fun. Make it very laid back with attention for what you want.
I found banana mashed up with natural yoghurt an easy one when I was nannying.
I think my meal times were laid back because I was always so busy wandering around getting things for all the children!! Perhaps you could eat at the same time and focus on your food when the feeding isn't happening.
You need to protect yourself from as much stress as poss. Children learn stuff at their own rate and at their own pace. I know that it is easy to write!
Take care and be cool. Talk to the health visitor as people have suggested.
All the best,
CG.:j

bobsa1

This may be no help at all but dd1 who is now 12 and will eat anything and everything was a nightmare for years. I used to take her to the doctors regularly as I could not see how a child could live on such little food.

I suggest plenty of snacks that can be eaten on the go, raisins, bits of cheese and apple, small finger sandwiches, rice cakes and plenty of milk.

This will pass although I know it won't seem like it at the momnet. I know have a dd aged 2 and she has breakfast, midmorning snack (rasins & rice cakes) tiny lunch, afternoon snack of sandwiches, cereal bar and virtually no dinner (often just picks) she is lively so she is getting enough to eat, just not at the time of our choosing (lol)

I do know what it is like but try to keep calm!

busymumof3

MY immediate thought was teeth when you said he was clamping his mouth shut and not letting you feed him. Perhaps he is cutting more than one. Mine always seemed to have 2 to 4 on the way in at the same time. If his gums are sore chewing the rice cakes may be helping ease them.

Quackers

Awwwww, hope you've enjoyed your glass of wine and bath xx

I haven't got much to add as everyone has given you fab advice.

Hopefully you will not feel so alone now. Try not to let it stress you out. Have you considered the weather - even me and my big hungry tum are not eating as much at mealtimes because its so hot and sticky. I seem to be snacking more throughout the day. Its not going to do him any harm & it'll be really easy to cut back on snacks through the day as he gets older.

My little niece who is 2 soon loves her food but is the messiest eater i've ever seen. She wont let anyone feed her and will not use a spoon. She even eats baked beans with her hands :rolleyes: My sis has a 3.5yr old too and is pregnant with no3 and has finally stopped worrying (she hasn't got the time!) and just lets her get on with it - much to the disgust of anyone who watches her eat :rotfl:

Take care & keep smiling. Come on here for a rant whilst hubby is away xx

Careful_girl

That is another thing IMO teething causes problems with EVERYTHING. Multicoloured nappy filling, angels turning into monsters the lot!!!:eek:
CG.:beer:

cookiesncream

Hi Lillibet! I'm sorry you've been having this stressing, I say there's nothing worse than a child being stubborn!! (I have no children of my own but I'm a nanny who specializes in children under 2)

Can I ask how much milk he's getting now and what he was getting before and the times? I agree with you feeding him the milk to give him more nourishment but I'm wondering if it's being given at the wrong time so it puts him off his next feed.

chivers1977

Hi Lilibet, My son is now 13 months and I had a thought re this. How much milk are you giving him? It could be that he is getting too much milk which means that he is not hungry. when they hit one they should be on about 350mls per day and 6-12 months about 600mls.

As an example, I give jacob 6 oz morning 6am and night 6pm. He has cereal and toast for breakfast at 8, i do cereal, he feeds the toast, snack of raisans or a couple of rice cakes or somefruit about 10.30 a sandwich and yoghurt, and fruit for lunch at about 12-12.30, snack again at 2.30 or 3 and dinner at 5-5.30. could the mealtimes need shifting a bit, ie are you trying to make him eat when he is tired. You will both work it out together and believe me I know about the nights. Jacob and I have been up since 4.30am!!

Churchmouse

Lillibet, just to say when I was looking after my grandson two days a week a year ago, we had exactly the problems you describe!! But although like you he was showing no outward signs/distress at teething once the tooth was fully through he went back to eating again until the next one. Could be the same for your little one maybe? We (that's his mum and me) didn't make the connection until at least the third tooth!:rotfl:

finc

Lillibet you have my sympathies. My son is now 28 months and is still a terrible fuss at mealtimes. He has always been a faddy eater and from about 12 months onwards refused to be fed, wanting to do it himself. He is now the opposite and wants me to feed him everything...even hold his toast while he takes a bite :mad:. Some peole may say I'm indulging him but he eats so little I'm just grateful he's having something.

He was a big boy born (9lb 15!) but now can still fit in 12-18 mths clothing. The HV's aren't interested saying he looks healthy and I agree it can be very frustrating.

The best advice I can give from my experience is to close your eyes to the mess, it can be cleared up later and walk away for a minute or so if you feel really stressed.

I've just about given up on conventional mealtimes with my son. Myself, hubby and daughter sit the table and my son doesn't bother. At tea time his food stays at the table and he has to sit with us if he wants some. When we're finished we clear his plate as well even if he's not finished.
Breakfast is usually on the floor in front of the TV :eek: as this is the only way he'll eat and he hasn't eaten lunch in over a year!

Your son may get over this soon but rest assured that he will survive even if it's more long winded . Carry on offering him new foods and his favourites as well. Some days he'll have them and others he won't. Don't focus on the waste as it'll drive you mad. Oh, and my son still has a large cup of milk in the morning and the evening as like you I feel better knowing he's at least had something.

Sorry this has been sooo long but it's a subject I've been dealing with for ages

Lillibet_2

Thanks everyone, I am feeling much calmer about things this morning, even if I did give up on his usual breakfast & give him bits of my toast:rolleyes: At least he ate a bit:p

I must admit to being totally confused about how much milk he should be having at the mo, he is still on about 24 ozs a day plus any extra at night. He doesn't really drink much weater although I offer it often, I haven't cut down on the milk yet beacuse I am worred about him dehydrating in this weather. I will give the HV a call now & see what she has to say, she is usually quite good (at least knows one end of a baby form another, unlike some of them!) I have been offering him his milk abotu an hour after a meal. So far I have only been offering him a snack mid morning & before evening bath if he hasn't eaten much dinner, but I will add a mid afternoon one too.

He loves banana, cheese, toast, crossiants (!), cooked carrots & cold chicken, it just seems a very limited, allbeit healthy, diet? Someone has suggested fish fingers so will get some of them too. Ihave foudn it much easier to feed him if I don't put him in his highchair, just pop food in his mouth whilst playing, I don't know if this is such a good thing?