Money Moral Dilemma: Should I pay my sister half the money our deceased father gave me?

Maat

If you really need the money and would struggle to give it to her why don't you discuss the situation with her? Morally it would seem the right thing to do to give her the £15,000. She's already approved of you having money which at the time she didn't so she's presumably a fair and reasonable person. She'd probably be seeking to do her best for you as well as herself/her own family. You may find that she really needs money, too, so if you discuss it openly you could agree to a fair distribution.

The law doesn't have a family. You do and I hope you want to be fair to your sister as well as yourself.

Groom

On hindsight it's a pity that your father didn't put in his will that she was to receive £15,000 more than you. Legally you don't have to give her the money but morally you do. It also depends whether you think £15,000 is worth the possibility of losing a sister and her family. 

PennysIntoPounds

Maybe say your solicitor has advised that everything needs to be according to the will and that you can have a conversation about this when everything is sorted as is required legally.
People lash out in grief, probably neither of you are thinking in the way you will be in six months time.
Be kind but firm and wait for the first shockwaves to pass.
I'm sorry for both of you for your loss

retired19

As has already been said,what's more important money or your sister?
Also when you say the gift was a few years ago was it more than 7 years? If not you personally may have to pay some tax on  it as part of your father's estate. 20% of £30,000 could be quite a big lump sum for you to find for the taxman. 

GeoffK

Why is she asking?  She was aware and agreed to the arrangement.  What would she ask for next?
In case you are wondering, I have given money to my children for similar reasons.

Bobz

My father died without leaving a will. Us 3 siblings agreed that one sibling could live in his house, but when our mother died my other sibling and I said that we should bring this property into account as sibling wanted to stay living in it (who wasn't keen as they'd inherit less money) but after some negotiating we settled it amicably. We shouldn't have been put into this situation, and wouldn't have been if our father had actually left a will.

Definitely use this opportunity to 'settle up' otherwise it is likely to re-emerge sometime in future. It's the fairest thing all round. it's clear what your parent's intention was.

Hammer56

Yes, absolutely you should give her half. That money would otherwise be in the estate to be distributed as per the will/probate outcome (if no will) if you didn’t have it. 

I’m in a similar situation. My mum and dad lent my brother £100k to help him with his mortgage when he was made redundant.  I agreed to it, we did a document to clarify it as a loan. Dad has since passed away, mum is nearly 95 now. We will be equal beneficiaries when mum passes.  The outstanding loan will be an asset of mum’s estate and will count towards her IHT calculation. My brother won’t actually have to pay it to the estate, but his inherited half will have the £100k deducted. All sorted out and planned in advance without using solicitors. 

It was slightly short sighted for you and your sister not to think ahead, but nevertheless it would be a bit of a disgrace if you don’t do the right thing by her UNLESS IT WAS UNEQUIVOCALLY AGREED AT THE TIME THAT IT WAS A ONE OFF NON-REPAYABLE GIFT AND YOU HAVE EVIDENCE OF THAT. Don’t risk ending up in court. You’ll lose a sister and lose whatever you end up paying solicitors and lawyers. 

keithyno.1

You say, "A few years ago, my father gave me £30,000 to help pay off my mortgage." A clue is in the word 'gave,' in other words it was a GIFT, and one which your sister was aware of. 

This is completely separate to your father's will - assuming his estate has been left jointly to you and your sister then your solicitor is quite when he or she says your sister has no legal right to the extra £15,000 she wants from the estate. 

You say your sister doesn't need the money but you yourself do. So if the £15,000 is the most important thing to you in your life right now then don't give her anything (you're legally not obliged to). BUT be prepared to face possible bitterness, resentment and family disharmony for the rest of your life where your sister is concerned. Only you can make this judgement call, whatever anyone else says on here. 

RSD7a

retired19 said:

As has already been said,what's more important money or your sister?
Also when you say the gift was a few years ago was it more than 7 years? If not you personally may have to pay some tax on  it as part of your father's estate. 20% of £30,000 could be quite a big lump sum for you to find for the taxman. 

I think that's incorrect. If his estate is over the threshold and the gift within 7 years, then the IHT comes out of the estate. It's not payable by the daughter. (as I understand it)

cj-mcg

Please ask your solicitor about the "hotch-potch rule" to satisfy yourself it has been taken into account in their advice before you make any decisions.