YNAB robber needs help to execute the plan

Wanna_Bee_Free

None of thise things happened in the end. Well I did a little thinking/panicking about Christmas. 

Spikeygran

Dont panic about xmas, none of it is compulsory. Sorry to hear you are still having a stressful time with family.

I stopped posting xmas cards years back when I refused to take money away from the kids to pay for the stamps, I may have been struck of a few card lists, but otherwise nothing horrid has happened. I think people feel pressured to give a certain value, but a real friend or loving relative is just going to be happy to have been remembered.  If they get snippy they are off my xmas list for good.

Theres some lovely stuff in charity shops, xmas games are often not played and sealed, its the thought that counts.  Otherwise just work out how much you want to spend and divide it up between all beneficieries in vouchers they can put towards something costlier.  I find 2nd hand books, cds dvds in good condition are acceptable especially if they are hard to find now.

OH and I had one xmas where we set a limit of £20 with the rule that it was all to be useful, it was fun finding it all.  I included a jemmy and a pair of giant monkey wrenches from a £ shop, which hes still using 20 years on  I stealth wrap mostly in odd shaped (free packaging) boxes so its impossible to tell whats inside, could be something tiny in a big box. It looks good under the tree.  I just get the big cheap rolls of wrapping paper to cover the boxes.

joedenise

I think our best Christmas was when we limited the amount to £5 per person and everything had to come from a charity shop.  

Now that the DDs and grandchildren are grown up we don't do presents at all.  They all earn more than we get in pension!

Blackcats

Try not to panic about Christmas - there's time for you to agree some arrangements with family/friends.  Myself and my DD's do Secret Santa even though there's only 3 of us so it's not very secret,  we buy bits and bobs up to a value of £20 and it's ok to buy from charity shops/vinted etc. myself and my OH have a nice Christmas card we use every year and a £10 present challenge.  It's fun and imaginative.

if you are doing the cooking then split the costs with your guests and remember there are great veg bargains in the supermarkets in the run up to Christmas.  The supermarket adverts for Christmas portray some mythical family and imply that unless you are drinking champagne all day whilst eating fancy food in matching jumpers that you are somehow missing out.  It's spending time together that's important and Christmas dinner is really just a roast lunch.

joedenise

100% agree @Blackcats.  The cheap present challenge is great fun!

Wanna_Bee_Free

Thanks for all your thoughtful posts everyone! I think everything you say is so true. I think I am only too aware it is really just a roast lunch and am trying to work out how to make it more special and turn my family into the TV perfect version. I reread a note I wrote to myself the last time we hosted at our place which was all about getting it done earlier and getting the housework done or not doing it at all. Apparently I decided to clean the windows at the last minute that year. Past self wanted future me to know that was a bad idea, totally unecessary. 

So I have 3 people to buy for, OH, littlesis & Dad. It's slso my Dad's birthday on XMas day so double for him. So the list is clear and small. I often get caught out with last minute itis so just need to get things bought calmly and wrapped early as I don't have the energy for last minute stress any more. I also have birthday gifts for little sis next month and OH after Christmas to sort. 

I pulled my shoulder so couldn't do our planned job so I spent a bit of yesterday scrolling for ideas. Lots for me, some great ones that suit nobody on my list but a few ideas there and started a list. 

I'd like to have everything sorted early enough. I'd like to get my relatively short Christmas card list written early too. No last posting date scramble. Oh and the neighbours, not forgetting the stealth cards from neighbours. 

Wanna_Bee_Free

There is a friend I buy for too. I need to post his gifts to him too.

Blackcats

Diane in Denmark is a nice blog to follow and she is doing a gentle weekly countdown for Christmas preparation.  It only started this week so you aren't behind.  I'm following along and enjoying it

Wanna_Bee_Free

Thanks Blackcats, will check her out. 

Yesterday was another NSD. Lost track this month but pleased about that. I didn't get much sleep the last two nights but trying not to think about it. I will have use of my father's car for the full 4 weeks I bought the emergency short-term insurance for so at least I don't have to buy train fares too yet, just petrol. 

Today is back to hospital; a routine trip for my father. My little sis still hasn't had the promised post hospital follow up. She's been back at her home a week and seems slightly better overall. 

Wanna_Bee_Free

@Blackcats thanks for recommending Diane of Denmark, her video style is totally different to flylady but the system is very familiar and I'm looking at her week 1 and week 2 printables to make a start on Christmas. Or my father's birthday roast lunch as I'm going to try and think of it.
 
I woke far too early so feeling sleep-deprived today but I am determined to crack on regardless. Yesterday I did my end of month review and hid some of my YNAB categories for now (Saving for a passport I don't need for a while and my August bank holiday festival) while I focus on climbing back up to zero. I've rolled with the punches and trimmed anything spare in my categories so almost all the balances are sad and empty. The YNAB robber has well and truly struck. I have allocated it towards the overspend on my unexpected crisis. The end result is I'm in a hole to the tune of £500. I will get £106 of this back later in the year when I request a refund for the 6 month car parking permit when my 4 week short term car insurance runs out and I finally return the car to my father as planned in September.

I plan to try and be patient with myself over the repayments, not try and do scorched Earth (I can't manage a month on a tenner and I've learned that now!) but focus on a realistic budget for November that I can stick to. I do need to watch all my spending just to stick to that especially with my birthday and anything fun I want to do when I'm home in London. In the past I think this is where I would give up on budgetting completely and tell myself I'll just spend as little as possible and then get sick of the whole thing and crash and burn.

In other news I plan to list two things for sale on Vinted today. I will also try and organise my ideas a bit more using my journal. I must remember to ask Father Christmas or the birthday fairies for that fancy pants notebook I didn't buy back in August.