Complete candour here. The experience of selling a house has made me suicidal.

tenzin_2

Not stressed, depressed, frustrated, angry, but suicidal. I am suicidal. 

On Tuesday when the house auction ended with one bid, which was then pulled by the buyer. When I received the message from the well known auctioneer, I was on a train. I rang my brother, who burst out into laughter. I hung up on him, and I was like my body went into autopilot. I just got off the train, and waited for the next train to pull in with every intention of stepping in front of it. 

I have been treated like a stupid c*nt by each and every EA, members of the converancing team, and the staff at this auction site. 

This is all I think about about every second of every day. I have spent thousands getting the house prepared. New electrical everything.  Asked my wealthy brother to  help with the costs, he refused, he said, wait till the house is sold, then we can divide it up. I am on benefits, my savings are gone, I am now in in £8000 of debt.
 The auction company dropped the price after being told explicitly not to. I had 40 viewings of the house. It’s a huge house with a detached garage. It is worth at least £360,000. They dropped it to £275000. One bid. And they pulled out.  The EA explicitly told me the system was no win no fee. What he didn’t tell me was what happens if you try to leave the contract. I have given them the 21 days written withdrawal. But guess what? Anyone the EA has introduced to the house, and their relatives or associates cannot buy the house for 12 months. Not that I met any of them. I was never present during any viewings.  So they have advertised the house again, dropped the price again.  Spoke to the auction guy, empty promises. I know I’m going to get screwed again on Friday. 
I was the sole carer for my dad until he died in 2024. My brother and daughter did nothing. The last weeks of his life were terrible. I was awake sometimes for 26 hours straight until the DN gave him sleeping meds. I did the Bereavement tax and Probate with help on the pages of this forum, and I so grateful for that. We could not afford a solicitor or their bs. And of course my family left it for me to get on with. But this selling of a house has broken me. It has truly broken me. 

After my brother mocked me like that I just did not want to live anymore. I have truly had enough. My dream of getting away from this sh*thole of a town I live in is gone. I knew I would never have enough to buy a flat. But I just want to spend the last few years of my life alone, away from here in this death house. 

Yesterday my brother walked into the house like nothing had happened and I screamed hysterically at him. When he refused to leave I called 999. That scared him, and he left. I can’t remember what I said to him but it was along the lines of I am absolutely done with you. I have never had an outburst like that with anyone ever. I will NEVER speak to him again. He’s always been nasty. 

I just want this house gone. I just want it gone. 

RAS

Please, please start by calling Samaritans 116 123. Their chat service seems not to be functional.

Will respond more in a bit

HampshireH

I would recommend a visit to your GP around your mental health.

A property will always sell if the price is right. Assume from your post this is an inherited property so costs will come from the estate?

If you just need it gone price it to sell. Recoup your costs and allow yourself to move forward.

Your brother probably isn't aware of the current state of your mental health and if he genuinely just walked into the house and got screamed at he probably wondered what on earth was going on.

Be careful not to alienate loved ones. And if they aren't loved ones walk away. 

Is there a reason you took the house sale one other than also just doing nothing? May have forced the hand of your siblings

RAS

Hi tenzin, looking back it's clear that your brother provided little or no help when your father was unwell or since he died?

And you've just "got on with it." It's quite possible it has never even occurred to your brother that you would appreciate it? Or that he's lived with the old chestnut which assumes that since single people have "no other responsibilities", they can somehow pick up all the slack? Just running a household takes as much work whether you are a couple or single, so the singleton has twice as much work to do, before caring for elderly relatives etc. So I understand why you were stressed before dealing with this house sale situation.

Added to which some "professionals" manage to speak to women like they do not know what they doing, or have the right to be treated with respect if they are doing something for the first time?

Do you have anyone with whom you can speak now? Who can offer a cuppa, a shoulder to cry on or the ability to listen whilst you rant, whatever it is that you need to feel a bit better? 

Smalltownhypocrite

First off, talk to a doctor about your emotional state.

Secondly, you do not have to talk to your brother. If he is bad for your mental health then step back, you can not be forced to have people in your life.

Thirdly, what is your situation with the house? like does it have a mortgage on it? are the debts on the estate that need to be paid with the house sale?

If you don't rely on the cost to cover debts then it might be best to just lower the price and get out. A house is only worth what someone will pay for it and anything you get after debt settlement is profit. You can then clean the slate and go anywhere you choose for a fresh start. 

You say it was on for £275k but thats a lot of money, there is many places you could outright buy a house for half of that (assuming you and your brother get 50/50). Where I live in the north east average house price in my area is £65k (2/3 bed terraces). You still have a lot of options even if you don't get what you originally wanted for it.

tenzin_2

I’m paying for the house I am currently rentlng, as well as the costs of insurance, water utilities for the empty house that will not sell. 

I would happily accept £150,000 for it, as long as I don’t have to pay any solicitor or other fees, I simply want it gone how. It’s been 1 year and 2 months. That’s why I capitulated and did the auction route. They got me where they want me, I am beaten down. 
This is a beautiful big house. Structurally sound, big rooms. Front and back garden, drive, huge detatched garage.

The house next door which is smaller went for £400,000. And someone died horribly in it, and it had a noise abatement order on it. I just don’t understand. When I looked up the people on LinkedIn who were viewing the house, one of them went 5 times.  I feel like some kind of scam is being set up, it makes no sense. 40 people? 

I have considered selling it to a housing association, if they actually buy them. 

Part of this is my fault. I knew these Estate Agents were lying when they made these promises. Most of them were kids. They smelt my desperation. 

As for my brother. He had that coming for years. He’s got a nasty streak, always had. Hated me for being on benefits. And I’m in a mixed race marriage, going on 30 years, he wouldn’t come to the wedding. Only my dad kept me cordial around him. 

I just want to know how to sell this house fast and get the money quickly so I can pay him, and get away. I’m dreading Friday. On Wednesday I have a meeting with the owner of the place I was planning to move to. I really thought the house would sell. I feel like a spider caught under a glass..
These f*cking people. How do they sleep at night? 

As for mental health services. I’m on three, Venlafaxine, Mirtrazapine and diazapam daily. I can’t go near mental health services or they would probably have me sectioned.  Can’t risk that. 

BridgetTheCat

Not sure how reputable they are, but if you just want rid of it there are companies who buy houses similar to we buy any car

silvercar

BridgetTheCat said:

Not sure how reputable they are, but if you just want rid of it there are companies who buy houses similar to we buy any car

They have a reputation for knocking the price just before exchange. Not to be trusted.

Was this a modern auction method? Otherwise, why wasn’t the winning bid binding on the purchaser?

could you put this in the hands of a solicitor who could take their payment from the sale proceeds?

housebuyer143

tenzin_2 said:

I’m paying for the house I am currently rentlng, as well as the costs of insurance, water utilities for the empty house that will not sell. 

I would happily accept £150,000 for it, as long as I don’t have to pay any solicitor or other fees, I simply want it gone how. It’s been 1 year and 2 months. That’s why I capitulated and did the auction route. They got me where they want me, I am beaten down. 
This is a beautiful big house. Structurally sound, big rooms. Front and back garden, drive, huge detatched garage.

The house next door which is smaller went for £400,000. And someone died horribly in it, and it had a noise abatement order on it. I just don’t understand. When I looked up the people on LinkedIn who were viewing the house, one of them went 5 times.  I feel like some kind of scam is being set up, it makes no sense. 40 people? 

I have considered selling it to a housing association, if they actually buy them. 

Part of this is my fault. I knew these Estate Agents were lying when they made these promises. Most of them were kids. They smelt my desperation. 

As for my brother. He had that coming for years. He’s got a nasty streak, always had. Hated me for being on benefits. And I’m in a mixed race marriage, going on 30 years, he wouldn’t come to the wedding. Only my dad kept me cordial around him. 

I just want to know how to sell this house fast and get the money quickly so I can pay him, and get away. I’m dreading Friday. On Wednesday I have a meeting with the owner of the place I was planning to move to. I really thought the house would sell. I feel like a spider caught under a glass..
These f*cking people. How do they sleep at night? 

As for mental health services. I’m on three, Venlafaxine, Mirtrazapine and diazapam daily. I can’t go near mental health services or they would probably have me sectioned.  Can’t risk that. 

Just to add, if the house is not in your name then the utility bills should be in the deceased name as they are the estates debt and you shouldn't be paying them out of your own money.  They can recoup the money when the property sells - it's not for you to pay them in the interim. 

Any house will sell low enough - if you really want rid of it, go to auction with a very low reserve and someone will buy it. You might not get what you want but you should then be able to cut ties with the place. 

tenzin_2

Solicitors cost money. If you go on Trustpilot look up house auction companies, but, click on the 1% rating of the page, because they spam the site with fake good reviews on top of the bad ones. The good reviews are semantically identical, same narrative structure, some pop the name of the agent in there. I was able to find the name of mine on their accident ly. It’s almost impossible to email them directly, they make you fill in a enquiry form You will see just how frustrated people are, and some are suing them. 

As for the buy your house now money tomorrow companies, they are worse than the mafia. As James Caan famously said, “ fuhgeddaboudit‘

sheramber

What feedback have you been given from the 40 viewers as to why they didn’t put an offer in?

Especialky someone who viewed it 5 times.