Juggling mum/work life, whilst looking after my future self, both financially & healthily

weenancyinAmerica

Sending hugs from America.

NeverendingDMP

missymoo81 said:

hi,

I’m so sorry, I  appreciate I haven’t been on here in forever. Honestly I can’t even tell you what life has been like the last month or so! So many ups and downs I can’t keep up. 

So there are significant redundancies happening at work, I have managed to keep my job by the skin of my teeth. My boss hasn’t been so lucky. And it also means OH can no longer do contract work where I work. The upshot of this is that boss is being a complete tw@ as he doesn’t understand why I’m staying and he’s going and is being vindictive and childish. He is leaving next week but won’t give me any handover, despite the fact I seem to have inherited all of his work. Apparently I may get a pay rise when all of the redundancies are over but it will be towards the end of the year. I’m working all the hours and am struggling. 

I have paid out hundreds and hundreds on car repairs and down payments for school trips I forgot I’d agreed to. I’ve had May’s birthday which obv cost money, presents and party etc. And with my longevity research, food shopping is costing a fortune. Along with diesel as I now need to be in work 5/6 days a week.

I’m struggling with seemingly never having any money, or anything nice, being surrounded by friends who are paying off their mortgage and have a life plan… It’s so difficult when I feel like I’m barely holding it together. I’m hugely into my overdraft again and OH is on the brink of a mental breakdown again and his therapist is costing a fortune, the only work he can get is away from home and he’s just not in a good place and I have no idea how to help him without bringing myself down too. 

Money wise I have a huge tax bill to pay in July as does OH who was going to use big business sale money to pay it, but it’s hit a stalemate over the lease and nothing is getting done and the money is in limbo. Roo had his wallet stolen, his phone broke so I really need to replace it as has May’s laptop and of course it is very nearly school uniform time which usually costs around £300, so I could do with finding another £700 by September. I just feel a bit sick and I’m not sure how to get a hold on everything. I worked today and have only got tomorrow off. Me and OH have 1 day off together this month, it’s just crazy. 

I’m also being audited by HMRC for child benefit?! I really hope my accountant has done her job properly and that I don’t have to pay anything back!!!!

Sorry I’m not expecting answers or sympathy, I just needed to vent.

In other nicer news, OH is Away and little cat who doesn’t like fuss has just cuddled up close by and is being all cute. It’s the little things. Oh and May made me a pasta salad for dinner because she knew I’d be home late.

Despite all of my whinging above. I am forever grateful for what I do have. 

Thank you for reading and staying by me.

Sounds like. A nightmare few weeks. Hoping it eased off and gets better for you 

missymoo81

pink_fluffy_sparkles said:

Sending you a huge hug! It sounds like a really tough few weeks for you xx

Thank you so much, I’m a firm believer of hugs make everything better. X

missymoo81

weenancyinAmerica said:

Sending hugs from America.

Thank you so much for your kind thoughts.

missymoo81

Thank you @NeverendingDMP I know it wil get easier it’s just a difficult at the moment. It’s trying to keep OH positive which is the real problem.

So I have a rare day on my own. So far I’ve done 2 loads of washing and am on my second cuppa. Trying to see if I can get the shopping budget down. And change the bills I’ve been meaning to change, need to claim my expenses from work too, as that’s £200. OH is Back tonight so I really need to clean and Tidy everything too. 

jwil

Try and get a bit of time for yourself today as well, especially if you are having to try and keep everything going, it's not easy!

Glad you managed to keep your job. I hope you get the pay rise eventually.  We've just been through the redundancies and it's really hard whether you are the one staying or going.  There was so much bitterness with the people who were forced out, and I don't blame some of them for sticking two fingers up at the employer.  It's no fairer on those who are left though who have to pick up the pieces of the work that still needs to be done without a decent handover.

missymoo81

jwil said:

Try and get a bit of time for yourself today as well, especially if you are having to try and keep everything going, it's not easy!

Glad you managed to keep your job. I hope you get the pay rise eventually.  We've just been through the redundancies and it's really hard whether you are the one staying or going.  There was so much bitterness with the people who were forced out, and I don't blame some of them for sticking two fingers up at the employer.  It's no fairer on those who are left though who have to pick up the pieces of the work that still needs to be done without a decent handover.

Hey! Oh @j@jwil I’m so sorry for you, and that you’re suffering at work too.  I haven’t caught up with your thread, I will try and catch up later. You completely hit the nail on the head, it’s really hard to lose your job but it’s also hard to be the one left. It is going to be a very different landscape in a month or so with so much work and too few people. It’s so bad even people that haven’t been made redundant are now jumping ship. I guess I’m playing the game of last (wo)man standing, and very much trying to be as adaptable, resilient and versatile as possible so I can slot into whatever role. I’m not going to lie it is going to be a hard few months.

My OD last month was £1500, I’m trying for it to only be £500 by the end of this month. And back level by the end of July. This is my goal and unlike my normal goals which are more based on shoot for the moon and see how far you get. I think this is actually more doable.

jwil

It's exactly the same where I am. I was originally going to be made redundant but then got reinstated. So I went through all that bitterness!  But now being one of those left, it's not easy.  I need the wage certainty for now, and the other benefits of being able to work around the kids, so whilst it's hard I'll be staying where I am in the short term.

Good luck with the OD.  Any reduction is a success!

mumtoomany

Hi, @missymoo81, keep on battling that storm, rainbows are on the way, hugs, mumtoomany.xx

missymoo81

Thanks all, work is still very dire, and car needs yet more repairs. OH is away again. Am trying desperately to make it so my overdraft is ‘only’ at £500 by the end of the month. It’s not looking amazing. Things keep cropping up. Like school trip money and then yet another school trip. Clothes for said trip etc. now we have camp this weekend and I need to buy insect repellent! No idea how much it is or where is cheapest! I’ve managed to budget my grocery shopping and had a sauna delivery yesterday for £40 for the rest of the month will need to find around £5 for top up shop for fresh bits. 

I was going ok until DS bought a game online, from his pocket money but still comes out of my bank account. So now only have £15 for fuel…. Which with all the will in the world is not going to be enough. Ah actually need to get bug spray out of that too…, so maybe £5 for fuel….. erm…. will endeavour to change the leftover euros from DS’s school trip. Which should give me another £20 maybe. Hmmm not sure £25 will be enough but we shall see how we go!