Juggling mum/work life, whilst looking after my future self, both financially & healthily

missymoo81

Hiiiii,

So I thought it was time I started a new diary as my old one got a bit complicated. 

A little about me. I’m a mum in my 40’s, my husband works away a lot, I work full time, and I have 2 children a tween and a teen. Along with 2 noisy cats.

The last few months have been hard financially, and my work is teetering on the brink of redundancies and OH is self employed and work is sporadic.  Because of this I want to get out of my OD and have an emergency fund of £1000 built up asap. Then once we’re on an even keel and I know more about what is happening at work I can then think about what to do next. 

I’m also very aware of my age, dementia scares me terribly as my nan died of it really young and my mum is showing signs. So I desperately want to try and look after my body and mind and keep the children healthy too. So I shall share my research as I learn it! 

I would love for you to join me in my journey. I will update more tomorrow. 

mumtoomany

Hi, @missymoo81. Lovely to "see" you again. Sorry to hear about your mum. Both my grandma's and my mum had dementia, it worries me too that I will get it. 

The trick I've found with savings is to "pay yourself first". When we first moved here we have an extremely low income, not much better now! I put £10 every month into an ISA, before I paid any other bills or bought food etc. Not a lot, but about all we could afford then. That has now added up to around £600. We have other savings now too. Start small, and keep going. I'll be reading and cheering you along, hugs to you and your family, mumtoomany.xxx

missymoo81

Thank you so much @mumtoomany it helps so much to have your support from the sidelines. 

Work is more than a bit stressful at the moment so sleep is alluding me somewhat. So last night in between thinking about work stuff and being grumpy about not sleeping, I was thinking of ways to save money.

Like everyone, my bills have gone up an awful lot, so I have identified things I think I can cut the cost of: mine and the children’s phone bills are £12 a month and I know I can get them for about £8 so I will look into switching. Our gas and electric deal is up and I know I can definitely save there. I have already cancelled Disney+ this year, I’m also going to cancel my delivery saver and see if I can shop more cheaply at Lidl, although I do struggle with this as I get drawn in by things when I physically shop…. But we can trial it. 

I have been very lazy of late and not been turning off switches or lights. Not to mention forgetting to lock the fridge so small cat can’t open it and leave it open all day! My oven useage has gone up, I don’t mind that as the meals I’m making I’m happy with, but I think I could possibly use the slow cooker? I will just need to be a bit more organised. I have turned the heating off though, much to the children’s moans.

I was really bad last week and bought food at work, even when I had brought food in from home, so that has changed this week, and I have a leftover burrito for my lunch! I also have not been food shopping this week. OH is away so I have been using up leftovers, and I was so pleased with what I made! 

I’m going to go off on a tangent here, so buckle up…… I have been doing research into longevity and more healthy living, so I have introduced more veg and beans into our diet, no brainer really, and have cut down on the meat. And it’s actually working and the children and OH are eating it without complaining! Sooo I had lots of carrots and sorry looking celery and mushrooms, lots of tins of various beans and tinned tomatoes, so I decided to make bolognaise. So I filled up my (fake) le crueset pot with the ingredients plus herbs and then whizzed up half with a hand blender and the children loved it. But I made so much, I divided it up and added some kidney beans and spices and turned it into chilli for burritos last night, I’ve got enough bolognaise for a lasagne and I have another huge portion left which I will add gravy and peas to and make it into Shepherds pie! I just can’t believe how much it all stretched and it actually tasted good! 

I am away this weekend to see OH. so I will have lots of time to plan sort everything, which is nice. I  have lots of sorry looking veg in the bottom of the fridge still though, not sure it will last until next week…. I may make it into a big stew. I need to pop to Lidl, as need to get cat food and maybe carrots to go in the stew…. I think I have some change so I will try and keep to that. Oooh I also have a free sweet treat from Lidl…. So that will be nice tomorrow on my journey. 

Anyway just thoughts for now. I will get down to proper money stuff this weekend.

joedenise

Nice to see you back again @missymoo81.  Good to see you are incorporating more veg and beans into your meals.  Another thing you could use to stretch mince meals is red lentils which cook really quickly and more or less disappear especially if you’ve added things like chopped mushrooms, grated carrots and courgettes.

Look forward to seeing posting regularly again.

Four_Seasons

Lovely to see you back, cheering you on xx

sudonum-mum

Great to see you back Missy.
I've not been on for ages and when I just logged on I thought I'd see if you had a new diary.

jwil

Welcome back!

missymoo81

hi,

I’m so sorry, I  appreciate I haven’t been on here in forever. Honestly I can’t even tell you what life has been like the last month or so! So many ups and downs I can’t keep up. 

So there are significant redundancies happening at work, I have managed to keep my job by the skin of my teeth. My boss hasn’t been so lucky. And it also means OH can no longer do contract work where I work. The upshot of this is that boss is being a complete tw@ as he doesn’t understand why I’m staying and he’s going and is being vindictive and childish. He is leaving next week but won’t give me any handover, despite the fact I seem to have inherited all of his work. Apparently I may get a pay rise when all of the redundancies are over but it will be towards the end of the year. I’m working all the hours and am struggling. 

I have paid out hundreds and hundreds on car repairs and down payments for school trips I forgot I’d agreed to. I’ve had May’s birthday which obv cost money, presents and party etc. And with my longevity research, food shopping is costing a fortune. Along with diesel as I now need to be in work 5/6 days a week.

I’m struggling with seemingly never having any money, or anything nice, being surrounded by friends who are paying off their mortgage and have a life plan… It’s so difficult when I feel like I’m barely holding it together. I’m hugely into my overdraft again and OH is on the brink of a mental breakdown again and his therapist is costing a fortune, the only work he can get is away from home and he’s just not in a good place and I have no idea how to help him without bringing myself down too. 

Money wise I have a huge tax bill to pay in July as does OH who was going to use big business sale money to pay it, but it’s hit a stalemate over the lease and nothing is getting done and the money is in limbo. Roo had his wallet stolen, his phone broke so I really need to replace it as has May’s laptop and of course it is very nearly school uniform time which usually costs around £300, so I could do with finding another £700 by September. I just feel a bit sick and I’m not sure how to get a hold on everything. I worked today and have only got tomorrow off. Me and OH have 1 day off together this month, it’s just crazy. 

I’m also being audited by HMRC for child benefit?! I really hope my accountant has done her job properly and that I don’t have to pay anything back!!!!

Sorry I’m not expecting answers or sympathy, I just needed to vent.

In other nicer news, OH is Away and little cat who doesn’t like fuss has just cuddled up close by and is being all cute. It’s the little things. Oh and May made me a pasta salad for dinner because she knew I’d be home late.

Despite all of my whinging above. I am forever grateful for what I do have. 

Thank you for reading and staying by me.

Four_Seasons

Sending you a virtual hug lovely xx

missymoo81

Four_Seasons said:

Sending you a virtual hug lovely xx

Thank you, I really appreciate that.

pink_fluffy_sparkles

Sending you a huge hug! It sounds like a really tough few weeks for you xx