Teetering on the brink

EatingBeans

https://forums.moneysavingexpert.com/discussion/comment/82172955#Comment_82172955

Thank you so much for this nudge! I’m not sure there was anything in it this week that is going to change what I am currently going to do with the debt, but your suggestion was enough for me to listen to the podcast for the first time and I am sure I will continue to listen in future. 😁

Not only was the podcast another way to get up to date info from Martin Lewis, but as I lay there in the dark, (feeling dreadful but listening anyway), I realised it was actually making me smile and in places I even let out a little chuckle to myself (particularly the woman hiding the horse and the suggestion that Martin can beat an Olympic athlete! 😂). Given my current situation has so drastically limited what I can physically do, it has become a challenge to find things that I am still able to do that makes me happy like that and it got me thinking. If a podcast about debt can make me smile, then just think of how many other podcasts that are probably out there that can entertain me and make me feel better?! And what about audiobooks?! Somewhere over the years I stopped even considering listening to audio stuff, always only thinking in terms of things I could watch. I guess I always felt like I never had the time to stop and just listen to something as my to-do list was always so long. Clearly that doesn’t apply now (well the list is long but I am doing none of it), but it just never entered my head to go back to audio until now! I can’t tell you how grateful I am to you @daisy_1571 for your suggestion because you have opened up a whole new world to me! I know it is probably difficult to imagine but even laying down watching TV and scrolling on my phone can sometimes take more energy than I have, but with a podcast, the radio or an audiobook, I don’t even have to look at something! I can just shut my eyes and get whisked away to another world, and if that turns out to be too much, I can just tune it out and sleep. Honestly, game changer! ❤️

So, if anyone has any more podcast recommendations, please feel free to recommend them! I think Martin Lewis probably has the debt side covered, but comedy or some other lightweight options would be great. I have an unused free subscription the Amazon music floating around and that apparently includes audible so maybe there are some interesting biographies or novels on there that I could get into? 🤔 I am genuinely really excited because it is something I can finally enjoy but at the same time give my body its much needed chance to rest! 😁🎉 Thank you!

daisy_1571

Oh I'm so glad you listened and enjoyed. I've always listened to something at night to get me off to sleep. Back in my teens it was a record, then tapes then cds and the radio. Listening is like being read a story, very comforting and if you drop off you can listen again multiple times through the night. It also gives you something to focus on in the dark meaning you can lie all comfy and warm without getting fidgety if sleep isn't coming.

Now its 'bbc sounds' on my pad. Lots of comedy stuff on radio4 extra. Go into schedules and you can scroll through each day to find something you like the look of. Click on it and go into 'more episodes' to see if you can get back to the first episode if its a story or continuing serial. Comedy shows obviously you can just listen to individual episodes. Sometimes a Saturday or Sunday will have an omnibus version of somethingthat's been on during the week in 15 or 30 minute slots if you want a longer programme. .

You can scroll through types of shows or search for names of shows.

When you start listening, tap the tiny little cog and there's a red or black dot. If its red it means it will automatically go onto the next programme. I always turn it off as the subsequent programme doesn't play properly but that just might be my pad.

There's loads of the Martin podcasts, although eventually they obviously repeat and the specific products in the old ones are probably not available now there can still be snippets of helpful plus just interesting things even if its just confirming you are happy with your plan.

If you like words Unspeakable is good, can be amusing and also interesting. I've just found More or less - fact checking some of the numerical stats bandied about. Here for the history is also full of fascinating info that I almost immediately forget 😄. Curious cases has a huge number of episodes you can pick things that sound interesting. John Finnemores Souvenir Programme is consistently witty. The Secret World is ludicrous and amusing.

Audible has great stuff i would imagine. The classic agatha christie stuff will be on there. I have cds of a lot of her stuff, sometimes just the book being read, sometimes the play so even listening to the same story is different. Sometimes I think I want the play, other times I want to hear the book so I enjoy the multiples 😆. I think the first series of Alone is on there which has never been repeated as far as I can see on bbc sounds. I've heard the subsequent series several times each but ive never heard the first series.

I'm so so pleased you got so much from this, I'm sure you'll get other suggestions or even tootling about yourself you will find things 😊

Dxx

northAthenian

• oooh podcasts were my discovery in 2020, i was late to the game. I am a reader by nature, but i cant listen to fiction on audio - i seem to tune out. Non fiction though I can, I have had a ball with audiobooks the last few years. ( will refrain from listing as i'd be here all day!!) However- podcasts…. I'm a bit of a creative type, so listening seems to work for me when sewing or knitting and for me i had a few sewing ones i liked already - one sewing person put me on to
• 'Darknet Diaries' (fascinating internet/ computer crimes, not my world but great stories) which led me to 'The Red Line' ( geo political, deep dive explanations, interesting things I'd not really have exposure to in my day to day)
• in turn led me to Conflicted' ( historical background and current affairs analysis for a lot of middle eastern countries, again nothing I knew much about previously) and
• 'The rest is Classified' lots of spy stories/current ffairs with an ex CIA analyst & bbc journalist.
• Seperately we both got absorbed in 2 true crime stories, by an amateur sleuth..'Fred the head' was one & the Gentleman of Heligoland was the other…..ok, after this essay i'll waddle off. I hope you have great fun finding things to listen to & distract you when exhaustion is ruling the day :)

ellenvan

Team Beanz supporter, just checking in to see how you are?

EatingBeans

Hiya, thanks for checking in, that’s very kind.

It’s been an exhausting few days. I had an appointment at the CAB on Tuesday to go through the Mandatory Reconsideration form for PIP. I was shocked when he told me he didn’t want to help me! He said that because I didn’t fill out the original form then I didn’t have a valid claim and that there was no way they just called me and made a decision based on that call. Honestly, despite having the rejection letter in my hand he seemed absolutely convinced I was lying! I couldn’t believe I had to fight so hard for help from the very people that are supposed to be there to help. 😞 Eventually he ran it past his supervisor and still came back with advice that I should just start again with a fresh claim but if I insisted he begrudgingly said he would fill in the MR for me. Apparently his argument was they would be looking for additional evidence and to me I thought well that is is because they haven’t had any evidence yet so I have lots I can add, he seemed to disagree and said I would have none. It was very confusing and I still don’t understand his logic. Needless to say, over an hour later he finished scribbling his 3 pages of notes, didn’t even read it out to me and refused to write anywhere on the form that the CAB had helped at all. He asked me to sign it so he could keep a copy and by this point I was too exhausted to argue anymore so I signed it and left.

Once I was home and rested dd2 very kindly read me what had been wrote and in parts he very clearly just made stuff up! I now have to some how write notes around it to explain the inaccuracies! I really don’t have the energy for all of this. 😢

Yesterday I tried desperately hard to spend recovering but the engineer came to fit the new full fibre broadband and he was here hours. It’s in and thankfully the transition to the new broadband seems to be going well but I have to say I was pretty annoyed to go outside to discover that instead of drilling through the bricks like every other sane person would do, he instead decided to drill through the middle of the stone windowsill! The sill already needs to be repaired and now whenever that happens it is going to be a much bigger job as it now has a cable running straight through it! 🤦‍♀️ I decided it wasn’t worth my energy to kick up a fuss (which I am certain he was relying on), and I figured that it is a future me problem should I even still own the house at the point that the sill gets fixed.

Today’s task was to gather the evidence to go with the PIP MR and go for a blood test. The blood test I did even though I am sure they will all come back normal again and resented the need to use up the precious energy I have on something just to tick a box, but i did it.

The evidence gathering for PIP was semi successful. I have printed off all my medical records since I had covid in 2024 and frankly even I was shocked at the number of fit notes! My plan is to go through and highlight any references to how it relates to the PIP criteria and maybe add a list of what I am sending and why. I’ve taken photos of my aids and a couple of the house generally to show the distances I actually walk, and hopefully get them to understand where I am coming from. Without the picture I would guess that most people would think someone was walking room to room when they said they can sometimes get off the sofa and microwave a meal, the reality is the sofa butts up against the fridge freezer and the microwave is against the fridge-freezer on the other side. So, when I say on a good day I can take a ready meal out of the freezer and microwave it so long as I sit back on the sofa when it cooks, I really am only upright for a couple of steps. The fact that most days I can’t even do that should hopefully tell them something! 🤞

EatingBeans

Oh, and I have now completed two of the 4 balance transfers I’ve planned to help reduce the interest on the credit cards. Just got to let that clear and I can sort the two remaining. It will still leave me with some at standard rate but the majority will be back at 0% or 5.9% over 30 months.

I’ve also decided that given the circumstances I don’t have the luxury of keeping the car for dd1. As soon as we have the next nice weather day the plan is to go and get it valeted, take it to a nearby car park and take lots of photos so I can get it sold. Anything I get for it will go in the bank for paying the bills.

EatingBeans

Yesterday I requested two more balance transfers and finally managed to scrabble everything together for PIP and get it posted. Absolutely exhausting to do and it wiped me out for the remainder of the day but I did at least get to watch Traitors! 🎉😱

Today should really be a complete rest day but my best buddy from my old work invited me to lunch so sod pacing for today, I am going to go out and enjoy myself (and almost certainly pay for it for days afterwards 😬). ‘All’ I need to do is have a shower, get dressed and turn up. My friend is going to pick me up and drive me back, plus she has offered to pay bless her. I know it is going to probably flatten me but I’m sure it will be worth it.

Cherryfudge

Enjoy your time with your friend! We all need treats from time to time and you've surely earned this x

ellenvan

Hope you have a lovely lunch.

You can rest on the sofa later.

EatingBeans

As expected, absolutely paying for going out with my friend. 😬 Still worth it but the pain in my legs and almost complete inability to stand drove me to buy a 2 in 1 rollator/wheelchair at 3am this morning (got to love the insomnia!). I probably spent more than I should but I did get it used off ebay. It’s another one of those ‘buy it while I still have access to credit purchases’ because I know I wont have the option in future and if I am debating it now then if I get worse the chances are that I will defo need it but by that point I probably wont have the funds/credit to get one. Let’s be honest, I am very unlikely to get it on the NHS even if I did manage to wait the three months for the needs assessment. I can always resell it if I make a miraculous recovery. 🤞

Hopefully the new set of wheels will mean I can get up and do a bit more around the house and I wont look at the few metres distance from the sofa and think ‘but that is so far from a chair’! Yes, it feels absolutely ridiculous to think that way but honestly my legs feel so weak and in so much pain at the moment even walking across the room is now something I find myself debating.

And on that note, time to try and get up and let the dogs out. All I can say is thank god for my wonderful brother and dd2 for sorting all the furniture out as it meant I was able to ‘sleep’ downstairs last night. No stairs to contend with! 🎉